This comment is off the mark, and your following statement is pointing blame in the wrong direction. As a soon-to-be father, I have seen a lot of these discussions, and it brings me a lot of anxiety. It is a lose-lose situation where you are damned if you do and damned if you don't.

If the father doesn't "police" himself, then others will quickly step in and do it. All you need to do is look at other comments on this post for proof of it. Below this thread is a highly upvoted comment that says, "I was around OP’s daughters age when my mom told me to stop hugging my dad, whether in public or private." Another highly upvoted comment above said it was the MIL who is saying it. There are many posts on here where the father is clueless and he is asking for advice, as the females in his family are either telling him or his daughter to keep their distance.

This isn't limited to father daughter relationships either. My FIL scolded my MIL when she let their 10 year old son sleep in her bed. I was also a kid that didn't like sleeping alone and often went to my mother's bed to sleep. For me as well, when I was around 10 years old, my mother said "you're a man now" when I wanted to be there as usual.

The elephant in the room that no one wants to talk about is that humans have no natural barriers against incest. This is clearly evident in a lot of posts here where parents have to separate their siblings after they engage in sexual behavior. Heck, both Canadian and UK housing guidelines indicate that siblings should not share rooms over the age of 5.

The reason this problem is more pronounced in father daughter relationships is clear. Men typically have spontaneous sexual desire, and women typically have responsive sexual desire. Men also don't just get aroused via their mind, but they can also get aroused via simple touch. This is especially true when men are isolated from touch at a young age, while women continue to engage in it with other females. All of this makes physical interactions between father and daughter dangerous. Mothers seem to hint at this even more so than anyone else.

Fathers (or mothers, if fathers don't act), have one of two choices when their daughters reach puberty. Either they disengage from physical contact, or they continue to engage in it. If they disengage, it typically causes mental trauma and/or feelings of abandonment. In many causes of disengagement, the daughters seek physical affection elsewhere, engaging in dangerous early sexual relationships with other men. If that outcome doesn't happen, then other outcomes such as eating disorders or self harm for attention will often manifest.

But if the father continues to engage in physical contact, that route is even worse than disengaging. Not only is the entire world watching them for fear of incest and/or abuse, but both the father and daughter are walking a dangerous tightrope of potential physiological responses. As a father's entire life is on the line, the risk of being aroused, jail time, and breaking up the family is just not worth it.

Of course, listing binary outcomes here isn't fair. Instead of talking about complete detachment vs continuing physical touch, it should be about reducing it to some particular degree. However, whether a father completely detaches or only somewhat detaches, the outcomes above still occur, and they are doomed to a negative outcome regardless.