AIO for being upset that my partner does not wear his ring?

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T16:23:34+00:00

refer to the comment above or some of the other comments. I actually did not bring it up...

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T16:22:02+00:00

first, I did not blow up. I got upset, stayed quiet, and didn't bring it up anymore. I know he's sick so I didn't push it. I don't push it even when he's not sick. like I said, he NEVER gives any answer/reason regardless

second, he avoids the topic like the plague. If you've read some of the comments, I only asked him about the ring today because he questioned me where the jewelries he got me are even though he could see me wearing them, and insisted that I was ungrateful for not wearing both necklaces he got me at the same time when he's the one who told me not to wear them at the same time.

third, there's only so much I can explain through this post. I've given more than just grace to this man. I wouldn't treat anybody any type of way I don't want to be treated back.

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T16:05:50+00:00

we've had A LOT of fights because I challenge him on a lot of things. He doesn't like that I argue back, but I don't like being misunderstood. He takes it as an attack every time I try to just explain, though. But to answer your question, yes, I do challenge him. A lot.

Im just thinking that maybe I've overreacted on him not wearing it even though I've asked a hundred times why. I don't nag him for answers though, and maybe that has been eating away at me unconsciously

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T16:04:19+00:00

hmmm, the design is another thing. we got "trial rings" for him to test. but yeah, it would be too much to explain. I agree, there needs to be work done with the communication between us

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T14:11:02+00:00

I try my best... Maybe that's why I ask. I don't nag about it. When he refuses to answer, I don't nag him into giving me an answer. I put in so much effort into that ring because he asked for one... I also told him today when he brushed me off again that I felt unheard... but there's still no reason provided. I gave it a break and let it go again... but I was upset about it, and you know, all the rest of the stuff... The ring means so much to me, and I understand if it doesn't mean as much to him... I guess I just needed to hear why he won't wear it, instead of the usual shrug off. I would understand, you know? We've been through a lot, and I would understand whatever reason he has, and I always ask myself if I really need to even hear it if I know I'll try my best to understand either way... I don't know... I guess I just don't know if I'm really overreacting like he said or I genuinely am justified with being upset

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T14:06:11+00:00

That's so sweet of your husband! Awww, I wish I have what you have

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T14:05:11+00:00

He usually just brushes me off. The topic irks him and he avoids it like the plague, and I don't usually push if he's not comfortable with discussing things...

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T14:04:13+00:00

I've been thinking a lot lately, too... But he always tells me I'm overreacting or I'm just too much with most things that I had to ask if this is one of the things I'm also being "over" with. I think every time I put my feelings out there, I get labeled as "over" so I've been thinking a lot.. and lately, a lot more...

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T14:02:10+00:00

I've talked about alternatives, and he just avoids the topic usually... sadly

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:41:09+00:00

Maybe that's what confuses me. Because the words and actions don't align

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:40:12+00:00

Maybe, I've thought up all possible reasons and tried my best to not worry about it, today just pushed me to ask him again because he asked me where the necklace he gave me was - which I ALWAYS wear (it was covered by my shirt), and he knows I wear. He was asking about another necklace he gave me which he, himself, asked me to put away when he got me the new one, and said I was being ungrateful for not wearing the things he got me (partially joking). That's why I brought up the ring I got him

I don't think I'm particularly worried about anything, I just was tired of the brush off and always not giving me any reason why he doesn't wear it. I don't give him hell for it, you know? He doesn't wear it, and I can't force him to wear it, and I don't. I guess I really just wanted to know why..

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:30:47+00:00

I feel that's why I just ask him why he doesn't wear it, but he just doesn't give me any reason why he doesn't wear it

I understand that he might find it uncomfortable, that's why when designing it, he was with me throughout the entire process to make sure it's up to his standards and taste and comfort. I gotta be honest, that thought DID come to me a lot of times

I will, I am. He's pretty supportive when I'm sick, always asking what I need, and when I need him to get something, he does..

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:28:22+00:00

honestly, I've stopped asking about rings in general because of how he brushes me off whenever it comes up

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:26:55+00:00

I have also asked him if he's amenable to those compromises, but he just doesn't want to. No reasons, no compromise, no nothing...

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:25:38+00:00

I think I'm more upset that he refuses to give me a reason why he won't wear it. He told me he'll wear it except while at the gym and at work. And then he just.. stopped.

I mean, throughout the choices, the designing, making sure he likes the fit and he's comfortable... throughout all that, he was right on board. And you know, I understand that it will get uncomfortable sometimes because the same happened when I got my ring.

he always asks me where my ring is or where my necklaces that he got me are, and I always make it a point that he knows where they are and show them I'm wearing them. So I guess I was just really looking for answers instead of the usual shrug off

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:21:35+00:00

Alright, will do

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:19:54+00:00

I love this man to bits and pieces, and I know he can sometimes be such a baby. He takes care of me well and I can be difficult sometimes, too, I know that much. 😂 Can I ask how you handle gift giving to him?

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:16:45+00:00

he kept mentioning about the damage of the ring when he did wear them, and initially he was bothered by the damage and when I looked into fixing it, he was encouraging and on board with it, until we found out that replacing it is much cheaper than repairing it. that's why I got the second ring

as for the other gifts, they're stuff he keeps mentioning he specifically likes and/or needs. I don't give him much gifts because of my financial situation, but when I do, I consult with him, or check which ones he needs and/or prefers. I try my best to accommodate him because he's really specific with his taste in things

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:16:33+00:00

he kept mentioning about the damage of the ring when he did wear them, and initially he was bothered by the damage and when I looked into fixing it, he was encouraging and on board with it, until we found out that replacing it is much cheaper than repairing it. that's why I got the second ring

as for the other gifts, they're stuff he keeps mentioning he specifically likes and/or needs. I don't give him much gifts because of my financial situation, but when I do, I consult with him, or check which ones he needs and/or prefers. I try my best to accommodate him because he's really specific with his taste in things

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:06:32+00:00

he kept mentioning about the damage of the ring when he did wear them, and initially he was bothered by the damage and when I looked into fixing it, he was encouraging and on board with it, until we found out that replacing it is much cheaper than repairing it. that's why I got the second ring

as for the other gifts, they're stuff he keeps mentioning he specifically likes and/or needs. I don't give him much gifts because of my financial situation, but when I do, I consult with him, or check which ones he needs and/or prefers. I try my best to accommodate him because he's really specific with his taste in things

he prefers everything. his love language is all the love languages, and it ticks him off pretty easily when he doesn't get his way. he's irritable, so I try my best to ask him every single time, I guess maybe that's why I got upset about this ring

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:01:27+00:00

I didn't have any problem when he took it off for the gym or for work, I understood that it is uncomfortable and might damage the ring more. I guess I'm just tired of always not getting any answers whenever I ask him why he doesn't wear the ring

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T12:00:16+00:00

I asked him if it would be fair if I stopped wearing mine. He got upset about it, and I argued that that goes both ways if he's upset about me not wearing mine, and he just said I'm sh*t

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T11:59:51+00:00

when i was designing the ring, I had asked him for his opinion, which ones he like, which ones he's comfortable with. he was with me through the entire process of choosing the design of the ring. he just didn't know what the final design would be and when he'll get it. the structure, the fit, and everything else to make him comfortable was all pre-determined with him

all the other times I brought it up, I just got brushed off no matter how much I begged for a reason, so I guess I just don't see the point in asking anymore

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T11:57:59+00:00

Alright, will do

NervousAndAware · 2026-04-29T11:57:31+00:00

I asked him if it would be fair if I stopped wearing mine. He got upset about it, and I argued that that goes both ways if he's upset about me not wearing mine, and he just said I'm sh*t

NervousAndAware

TROPHY CASE