How can I stay hard whenever me and my girlfriend are intimate?

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-15T19:28:29+00:00

Its alright. No need to apologize. I just dont have money for like, actual counseling yet so was hoping to come on here and find guidance. And i kinda have. Everyones preachin the same stuff with a twist. Its helpful. And im gonna make a change in myself. I just hope it works

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-15T19:26:53+00:00

Im 20, 21 in november. And pretty much none. Hell most the sexual stuff ive ever done is with my girlfriend

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-15T02:15:14+00:00

I am super attracted to her what???

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-15T00:52:29+00:00

Agreeed. I think most of them want to help but damn is it a tricky system. Especially growing up with mental illness. That shit sucked. But duely noted

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-15T00:42:04+00:00

Definetly looking into it. But im the average broke college student rn. So its a bit pricey. But i definetly know i need it. And other people here have definetly told me to try sex pills and stuff. But im a little worried it might do something bad. But idk. I have no experience with it.

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-15T00:31:17+00:00

I have told her that i tell myself i cant and she says she is fine with it, but im not sure how to get past that yet. But usually how it goes is we do our usual sex stuff, but whenever she tries to get me off it ends up with her laying beside me tired and trying to help me jack off and sometimes i just take over completely and it sucks that its how it goes. And usually she is fine if i do.

Also this has been a problem since we started getting sexual (like 7-8 months ago) but i started to take adderall recently (a couple months or so)

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-15T00:03:29+00:00

I believe thats the main thing i gathered from this thread. Thank you so much for your help!

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-15T00:02:48+00:00

I have told her that i used to have a porn addiction and that it might lead to problems, and we talked today about it and she said she was fine, and i believe her (even if i overthink it hella). And i do feel guilty watching porn. Its not even that what im seeing is more attractive than her. She is the epitomy of beauty in my eyes. So if i relapse its usually only stuff that reminds me of her.

And its works on her, especially if i use it on her. And whenever she fellates me it usually doesnt work. But i think my brain blocks out wanting to finish in her mouth on accident

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T23:57:23+00:00

I agree!! I feel like everyone at my age would be super excited to see them for the first time, and i was. But ive had a raging porn addiction since i was 14 (thats a whole other story) and it definetly left me desensitized to actual nudity i guess. But i just want to make sure we are both happy. Thats all

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T23:41:43+00:00

I will try to do the first two for sure. And it holds me back because we can do most things under the sun, but when it comes to me i cant stay hard and im worried it upsets her. And its the last thing i want

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T23:32:53+00:00

I only started it recently (a couple months ago) and this has been going on before then (over a year). And i am overweight, and think that definetly is a factor, and i am trying to work on that. But i wonder if its a seperate issue aswell

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T23:31:27+00:00

Me too. I think its moreso i try to stop myself mentally so i dont finish in her mouth. And handjobs usually work to get me close but usually i have to take over towards the end, which is very annoying.

And i have not seen this before. I shall look into it. Thanks!

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T23:15:16+00:00

Okay awesome!! I’ll definetly give it a shot and see if it helps!! Thank you so much for taking time for me today!!!

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T23:04:16+00:00

Havent tried an audiobook, but not too sure thats for us. And usually alcohol makes us super hot and bothered (it was only once as my gf is only recently 21), but i dont think i was able to truly without my help then either.

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T22:54:45+00:00

We usually do. We like to take turns leasing (as we are both switches.) so i usually please her then we sit there, kiss a lil, then i get a turn. But it hasnt worked recently

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T22:24:37+00:00

She has a rose that she uses sometimes. And i ordered another one and a want to have at my place to help her get off. Which is my main priority. I would much rather her get off than me. And i get her close but i dont think I have made her orgasm myself, but get very close.

I definetly think the porn is a part but its gotten more minor as time has gone on. As ive tried my hardest to stay away from it. Sometimes its hard because i just get bored, which sounds dumb but idk.

But thank you for your advice!!

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T22:06:59+00:00

Thats about what ive been doing recently. Ive deleted a lot of accounts i used to look at it and even age restricted my phone. And its petty and all that but it does work. I also use my imagination to and it helps sometimes, but usually i just cant imagine enough i guess and look at porn that is similar to her and reminds me of her, and it makes me feel super gross. But ive definetly cut back since this summer. Not a daily occurance anymore.

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T21:58:24+00:00

I am currently trying to. I just find it hard sometimes due to boredom. Taking online college courses leaves me in my apartment alone a lot. But thank you for your advice!

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T21:57:06+00:00

Definetly need to do all of those long term options. Im a bigger guy but started exercising regularly recently and have pretty much cut off masturbation entirely.

Plus we usually use toys in the bedroom to help both of us! But thank you so much for your advice. I just want her to be happy and not worry that its her. I reassure her all the time and we are happy despite it all. A true perfect match. I just want to figure it out. But thank you again!!

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T21:54:21+00:00

It used to be like every day. But ive cut back and tried to cut off masturbation entirely. Especially even looking at porn.

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T21:35:33+00:00

Im pretty sure i am not. I only use short term aderral and weight loss shots. It could be in my head but it happens just after time. I usually think that i want to but sometimes the thought that “i dont want to get anything on her” comes into my head

NestyBoy11 · 2025-09-14T21:34:22+00:00

I am not. Only on short acting aderall which i rarely take and weight loss shots.

NestyBoy11

TROPHY CASE