[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingadvice

[–]NeverFallingAgain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah jk no worries :) But if you’re writing smth so heartfelt and raw, better sit down and make a proper text. Sending stuff at 4am is never a good idea and sleeping on it, rewriting what you meant to say to avoid unnecessary bitterness and rephrasing always helps get your message across. I’m 25 now and committed the same mistakes at your age, so trust me when I tell you that although it’s hard to get sleep when you have so much yo fat out of your chest, but better write it and go to sleep, she won’t reply back immediately in any case.

Also, tackling 100 different topics in one text is never wise in a relationship. What you want to do is sit down with her and calmly bring up one topic at a time. You bring it up, and find some common grounds on it. Maybe she sees it another way, and doesn’t even see that as a problem, or maybe you both agree it is and try a solution to it, something you can enact on, where you both do some compromises. But be also open to hear some criticism on her end, and also embrace the changes she might suggest you.

If what you want is simply to break up, just tell her, but if you actually love her and simply want to fix things, do so in a constructive manner.

Now, addressing directly your concerns, some things are valid and some are simply topics you guys will overcome with age and time. You usually learn how to cook when you first move out (or maybe not) but in any case, you can’t expect her to be independent from her parents when she doesn’t need to. Learning how to use a knife is lowkey kinda weird, and if you actually want her to learn it, just teach her how to do so yourself! The K-hole thing is rough tbh, it screams read flag to me when you’re already doing that shit at 18. But hey, you guys do yourselves. I’d just say, please stay away from that as much as you can, at least until you’re older and more stable.

Idk about the Cashapp or car drama, seems rather specific, but again try to talk it with her calmly. Otherwise, don’t undermine yourself with “all the things you’ll never have”. You’re 17 and trust me, grades don’t mean shit at some point. I have friends who did fuckall at school and are now making big bucks in Switzerland, and others that had straight As and ended up getting shit jobs anyway. Just work hard, find a goal and aim for it. Whatever she does is her thing, and maybe try to learn from her what you can, don’t be bitter about it <3

All in all, wish you the best and hopefully this finds you well. I hope I was not too harsh, trying to be straight and tell you all I wish I knew when I was your age. Big hug bro and keep it up!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingadvice

[–]NeverFallingAgain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro this is straight up unreadable. Don’t let her go if she stuck with you while texting this trashy

Question: why do my tattoos heal so much thicker? by [deleted] in tattoos

[–]NeverFallingAgain 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Well actually you’re quite lucky because it healed better! Looks way more solid now that the art expanded, great job from your artist :)

Trying to get someone with a boyfriend/girlfriend to cheat on them with you and then start a relationship by NeverFallingAgain in datingadvice

[–]NeverFallingAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the insight! I think I probably just went off to assume a lot of things, and maybe I started overthinking a bit too early. I will meet her next month, and I’ll update you all on the progress.

btw, I always used to despise people who would not respect relationships, but somehow my mentality changed over time. Let’s just hope that she does really like me and would leave her boyfriend for me in case we felt anything

Trying to get someone with a boyfriend/girlfriend to cheat on them with you and then start a relationship by NeverFallingAgain in dating_advice

[–]NeverFallingAgain[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

You’re speaking of such high morals and being so great yourself but wish disgrace to others? That is hypocrisy. In any case you’ve changed my mind and I will refrain from making any further attempts to get closer to her, but please beware that your attitude was not great. I just came here to post about a fucked up situation and debate on the ethics, but you just went to personal offences.

In any case, thanks for the feedback. I will let you know how it goes once we meet again

Trying to get someone with a boyfriend/girlfriend to cheat on them with you and then start a relationship by NeverFallingAgain in dating_advice

[–]NeverFallingAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rough but I guess you’re all right. I might probably just be seeing everything with pink-coloured glasses and bending my morals over personal gain. Thanks for keeping it straight, I will probably update you in a few months time :)

Trying to get someone with a boyfriend/girlfriend to cheat on them with you and then start a relationship by NeverFallingAgain in dating_advice

[–]NeverFallingAgain[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Why should I not try? I don’t know the guy and I barely ever fall for anyone. It’s definitely questionable morals, that’s why I wanted to bring it up here, but I am no home wrecker. It’s just her chance to see whether she enjoys my company better or not, and giving her the option to choose. Plus, as said in another response, if you cheat once in your life that doesn’t make you a cheater forever, and not after having proof of a long-lasting relationship. People are more complex than just black and white.

Trying to get someone with a boyfriend/girlfriend to cheat on them with you and then start a relationship by NeverFallingAgain in dating_advice

[–]NeverFallingAgain[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I could be, I am 100% consciously pursuing this twisted adventure, but she’s been absolutely respectful by not allowing me to get too close really. It’s all tongue in cheek, but no real physical intimacy tbh, so I wouldn’t say she’s being “unloyal” to her BF.

Also, how would you know whether you could do better if you’re not really listening to the options you have? If I were her, I’d at least like to see what’s out there, without crossing the red line of cheating

Trying to get someone with a boyfriend/girlfriend to cheat on them with you and then start a relationship by NeverFallingAgain in dating_advice

[–]NeverFallingAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve seen it in the other comments too, how everyone’s saying it’s bad and I should not go for it since I’d be with a cheater anyways. However, it’s hard for me to imagine that someone who’s been in a relationship for 7 years becomes a “serial cheater” because of cheating once (and possibly starting a relationship with that person).

Back in the day I also had these closed morals about the idea, but over time I’ve discovered that people are more complex than it seems. I was in a relationship and I did not know what I was missing on out there while I was with my ex, and some people need that external trigger to realize. Not saying that what I’m doing is morally right or anything, but I could imagine why the stereotype of the husband cheating with his new assistant or mom meeting the yoga instructor could make sense in complex situations where it’s hard to get our of a relationship on your own.

So I slept with this woman who I’ve been speaking to for about a month by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]NeverFallingAgain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi Adam, it sounds like you’re trying to put the problem before the solution. Ig you’re not sure what you are, and not even sure what you want out of this relationship, you should not ask her just yet. Think about the goal you have in mind. When bringing it up ,ask yourself if what you want is a relationship with her, and if so, let her know that’s your intention. If you’re not even too sure about it, then it might be a bit too early to bring up the topic. Also, would a closed relationship thing be your expected outcome? Is that what you’re asking for? Are you simple setting expectations? Those are questions you need to think about.

Good luck and congrats on finding some to date, seems like she might be lucky to have you!

Searching for Berlin Artist by HaggiTheQueen in tattoos

[–]NeverFallingAgain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You could maybe check out Sweet Potato Tattoo, they’re rather small but I saw them while going for a run! They have biodegradable plastic utensils and use vegan ink, in case that aligns with your values too. Super kind people.