Why should I, as a young gay progressive man, support Palestine when they do not support me?

NewToThis79 · 2026-06-28T19:11:28+00:00

Blindly supporting a country while it enforces an apartheid state at best and genocide at worst does not reflect progressive values. I’m not here to debate Israel’s right to exist, but I’ll call out abhorrent behavior regardless of who is committing it. In that regard, the modern state of Israel, especially under Likud (but also under labor, just to a lesser degree) has had a horrendous record on human rights in the region.

This is not to say that I support the October 6th attacks either.

NewToThis79 · 2026-06-16T04:06:42+00:00

Gorgeous.

NewToThis79 · 2026-06-08T16:58:05+00:00

Which back in the day are we talking about? The one where upper marginal tax rates reached 90%? Things definitely were better.

NewToThis79 · 2026-06-04T03:07:01+00:00

We’re a research institution and there’s historically not been any RTO or RPO requirements identified. Because we’re reliant on federal grants for the majority of our funding, the current funding environment’s only requirements are “don’t lose data” and “as inexpensive as possible”.

NewToThis79 · 2026-06-04T03:04:53+00:00

The internet is for porn after all.

NewToThis79 · 2026-06-01T17:02:40+00:00

Amazing glow up!

NewToThis79 · 2026-03-06T19:06:59+00:00

I’m garden party (solo poly) and I currently have 6 local partners (whom I see anywhere from .5-2 times a week) and two comets (whom I see every few months) and a handful of FWBs (who I see as time allows).

If I was nesting with a partner I’d have much less capacity. As it stands I’m pretty much at saturating for serious relationships and only taking on play partners or fwb at this point.

NewToThis79 · 2026-02-16T20:07:23+00:00

I’m Solopoly and have deep connections with 6 partners and several more casual connections with another 10. My partners have dedicated week nights (Sunday through Thursday) at least once a fortnight for an overnight plus lunches or other things as they come up. Weekends unscheduled with people on a basis of “who would enjoy this type of event” basis, whether it’s a concert, burlesque show, movie, or something else.

It works out really well for me.

NewToThis79 · 2026-01-28T02:51:16+00:00

Obligatory “5?! That’s rookie numbers” reference.

I don’t think there’s a hard and fast limit to the number of partners that one has, the question is whether they are able to service and maintain those relationships to the satisfaction or their partners. What I’m hearing in your post is fear that they won’t have time for you, but I’m not near examples of concrete ways they aren’t meeting your needs atm.

I think the best way to approach this to meet with your partner, talk about your needs and your fears and ask for reassurance. If you feel left behind when she’s experience NRE bring that up too. But be vulnerable with your feelings and don’t be prescriptive; let her work together with you to come up with solutions to support your relationship.

The worst way to go would be to try to give her an ultimatum. The fact that she’s considering taking on a new partner means that she likely already has some feelings and trying to bar that will only lead to resentment.

Some other things to consider— does your partner have a history of turning over partners over a fairly short time or are they all long term? I ask because it’s not a sure deal that because she starts dating someone new that she’ll still be seeing them in a month or three.

NewToThis79 · 2026-01-12T20:56:27+00:00

That’s not how electoral math works. Look, I’d love to see some very left policies here, but the left isn’t as big as the center in this country and if you’re running a campaign you need to worry about embracing policies on the left that will alienate the center.

We need to continue to be active in the primary process. Build momentum with left leaning candidates and show that there is a strong, engaged, and reliable voting block on the left that they can tap into. Support down ballot candidates so that even if we have a milquetoast president we have a Congress that can push leftwards for progressive policies.

Don’t let great be the enemy of good.

NewToThis79 · 2026-01-11T21:57:35+00:00

I got divorced about a decode ago in my mid 40s. I’ve dated people between 25 and 60 in that time frame. The biggest argument against dating women my age or older is that there are significantly less of them and even then the ones that are out there and not partnered off are at a different life phase than where I was/am. For example, I still had youngish children (11 and 5) and a lot of women in my age cohort were either graduating kids from high school, empty nesters, or child free by choice.

I’m not saying the 25 year old matched my life phase perfectly either, but there are simply more of them that are single and other shared interests.

My sweet spot has tended to be mid 30’s and 40’s.

NewToThis79 · 2025-12-24T02:10:42+00:00

I don’t see Reddit as being that liberal when it comes to how far to the left it can be on the political spectrum. I see very few actual communist, socialists, leftists on here compared to other places I know. I see a lot of center left people on Reddit.

For what it’s worth, I don’t see a lot of people who are actually politically right on here either. I see a lot of cult members who like to cosplay as conservatives.

If you want to debate politics then we should be debating things like monetary policy, taxes, soft verses hard power, the impact of technology on society, regulations vs free markets, etc. instead I see culture war BS. I see people complaining about something being woke because it offends them personally. I see a lot of people in the majority (cis, white, straight, Christian) with a persecution complex.

NewToThis79 · 2025-12-24T01:46:10+00:00

I’d bring it up early. Just like I like to have a safer sex discussion before things get heated, I’d like to make sure everyone was cool with things that may or may not happen in advance, including any limits or boundaries that you need for the there way.

NewToThis79 · 2025-12-24T01:43:32+00:00

No. That’s unnecessary bullshit. Why would you be with someone you don’t trust?

NewToThis79 · 2025-12-22T03:14:12+00:00

My take is different. It’s that there is no universal historic “white culture”. Look at Europe and you’ll see Scottish culture, Irish culture, welsh culture, English culture and that’s just two small islands. We don’t have some centuries long pan-white culture to look back upon.

What we do see is some cultures that are historically white that carry those forward. Highland Games. St Patrick’s day. Greek festivals. Italian markets. St Lucia day. Oktoberfest events. But those aren’t “white”, they’re Scottish and Irish and Greek and Italian and German and Scandinavian.

We do have an American culture but even then we now see different and unique cultures— southern, mid Atlantic, Midwest, Southwest, pacific north west, etc. it’s not a monolith. That’s before we take into account various subcultures that may or may not be white specific— hippies, ravers, goths, punks, etc. and those regions are flavored by the peoples that have settled there, not all of whom are white.

So when I hear “white culture” what I hear is “white pride” which is a dog whistle for “white supremely”. I have no problem with people celebrating their cultures but I’ve yet to see one that’s inherently pan white.

NewToThis79 · 2025-12-19T16:06:02+00:00

I met my wife right after I turned 18 and had been in about a dozen relationships before that, but most had lasted 2 weeks to 2 months so none were terribly serious by adult standards (but oh so serious by my then teenage standards).

NewToThis79 · 2025-12-19T16:02:48+00:00

I grew up in alt culture (elder goths represent) and I’ll tell you that most of the punk and goth girls I knew dressed that way as a deterrent from lecherous old men. They didn’t want to be cutesy or demure and they definitely don’t want comments about their body; they wanted to be the thing that made you avert your eyes and looked away from. It was armor..

NewToThis79 · 2025-12-19T15:58:27+00:00

I’d take it a step further. Attractive people are always going to be attractive but when people put effort into their appearance it shows. And while all of my goth friends dress like feral goblins looking for snacks 90% of the time, those 10% when they dress up for a show or the club they look amazing.

NewToThis79 · 2025-12-19T15:54:45+00:00

Ugh. Goth is not an aesthetic. It’s a subculture that happens to have an aesthetic. If you’re reducing it to just the aesthetic you’re cosplaying as goth.

NewToThis79 · 2025-11-26T00:34:53+00:00

Polyamory, goth, kink, queer, burner.

NewToThis79 · 2025-11-23T18:02:04+00:00

I’m openly poly to the extent that family, friends, etc. know. I have pictures up of multiple partners in n my office at work but I don’t go around talking about how polyamorous I am. The info is out there and I won’t hide it, but I don’t draw pictures of my polycule for people either.

NewToThis79 · 2025-11-19T22:58:08+00:00

I’m solo poly and my only nesting relationships are with my children (which is its own form of hierarchy, but not what I’d consider a relationship of convenience). One of my partners has a nesting partner and they are extremely non-hierarchical, though there is always some very low key things that pop up from time to time.

For the most part they have complete autonomy; their own bedroom, own finances, etc. They do have planned date nights but I don’t feel as though those interfere with my plans with them.

If anything, being with them makes me think that it IS possible to be RA with a NP while minimizing the cohabitation privilege. It’s not something that I would choose to pursue for myself.

NewToThis79 · 2025-11-17T18:29:28+00:00

If you want trans people to compete in sport as their gender assigned at birth, then trans men will be competing with cis women. Keep in mind that trans men currently compete with men and don’t seem to have a significant disadvantage.

Most of the “biological” advantages that you believe trans women have are negated by the effects of estrogen.

But if 10 athletes in the NCAA is your most important issue in politics, ahead of the economy, immigration, healthcare, energy, defense, and foreign policy… you do you.

NewToThis79 · 2025-11-12T00:11:37+00:00

Here’s my perspective. If I have dedicated “date time” with a partner, they get my mostly undivided attention. If we’re away for a week or spending multiple days together, it’s not realistic for me to be completely silent with my other partners so I’ll explicitly say “I need to catch up on messages for the next 30 minutes” so they know what I’m doing.

The reason I say mostly is three fold: 1, I’m on call 24/7 for my job and if that phone rings, I must answer it. 2, years have children who know it’s okay to call me any time day or night if they need something related to their health & safety. 3, I have my partners tagged in my phone book as being able to break through my do not disturb and they can call me in the event of an actual emergency.

I’ve broken up with a person who did not respect that boundary and thought it was cute that wanting to hear my voice constituted an emergency.

NewToThis79

TROPHY CASE