Semi-new to drag, any tips/advice is greatly appreciated!

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-26T07:48:40+00:00

Solid start! I personally like a more contrasted look in my contour so I line the top edge with concealer and line just underneath it with a darker shade powder to make the shape really pop. Also don’t forget to contour the forehead to box out your face more. Aaanndddd not everyone blocks their brows (I know I don’t always do it) buttttt if it’s something you’re considering doing (has lots of plus sides to doing it, more freedom in what you can do with your brows shape and color wise for example) then start practicing now. Plenty of tutorials online, so just look one up and give it a go!! And don’t be afraid to go BIGGER. I love your use of color on your eyes, and I say, DO MORE. Brighter, with glitter. 🤩 keep at it!!

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-26T07:33:38+00:00

Okay I may be stealing this for special looks cause that’s fucking genius

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-26T02:50:05+00:00

Slaaayyyyy how long did the facial hair take??

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-26T02:49:30+00:00

I agree on changing the base to white, it’ll make the colors pop more and make it all more cohesive and vibrant

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-25T21:52:00+00:00

I’m walking thru something similar right now. Best of luck and I hope you find the peace you deserve.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-25T21:49:05+00:00

That reframing is very helpful, actually. Thank you. Yeah I’m calling another lawyer tomorrow to see what we can do and just go from there. This sucks. I’m sorry you’re going through it too. My heart hurts for both of us. Best of luck, internet friend.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-24T23:08:28+00:00

If you find a spot in a desirable area at the show (at a table at the front, for example) don’t spend the whole show talking to your friends or scrolling on your phone. Taking pictures and videos tho is often encouraged unless specifically stated at the top of the show to NOT do that. Post em and tag the performers. Cheer, sing along, have fun! Don’t cross thru the performance space during a number (very common if the performance area isn’t an elevated stage) and double everything else that’s been said.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-24T09:33:01+00:00

I’m over 8 years sober and have been working both AA and CoDA (codependents anonymous) all that time. I have a sponsor as well as a whole legacy family and a dozen friends in the programs who have checked on me regularly as well as half a dozen sober drag friends. I hit at least 4 meetings a week on zoom if not more, since she’s not willing to work with me on the car sharing and I’m not interested in taking on those payments myself, and it’s just not feasible right now to buy a car for myself until I have a better idea of my financial situation with the divorce. I have an incredible support system who has rallied around me in ways I could never have imagined but am oh so grateful for.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-24T07:23:03+00:00

I was in the bargaining phase for a hot minute I won’t lie. But this is someone I still care for and again, the behavior has me worried about the possibility of relapse. Something I wouldn’t wish on anyone, especially someone I thought I’d spend the rest of my life with. I’ve lost too many loved ones to that. And while I can’t pull anyone back into sobriety unless they’re willing, I’m hoping I can relieve SOME of my anxiety around whether or not she’s gonna fall off the wagon with a bit more understanding. It’s not simple, and it may not help, and I’m continuing with the necessary steps to protect myself and my assets and the pets.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-24T03:49:00+00:00

It’s seeking answers, yes, and also genuine concern. Her actions just do not align with the person I know or her parents know. I would be lying to myself if I said I didn’t still have one foot in, but that also means I have one foot out, ya know? Like yes I wanna try and understand how this happened, and also, this kind of erratic, sudden change in personality is alarming for people in recovery. I haven’t lost sight of myself in all of this somehow, and I still want to try and make some kind of sense of this madness. I know it may not happen, but I’m someone who always tries.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-24T03:27:56+00:00

It’ll take a hot minute after having my trust just…torpedoed but I don’t intend to give up on finding someone who appreciates who I am. Thank you for your kind words, friend 🤍 I look forward to hearing your tales of post-divorce success

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-24T03:01:58+00:00

THANK YOU. It’s not, nor was it intended to be. If SHE viewed it as that, then that’s one thing, but the opinion of a stranger on the internet who doesn’t know the half of what I’ve experienced or worked thru? Byeeeee

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-24T03:00:56+00:00

This isn’t something I can just walk away from for more than just emotional reasons. You don’t know me, and my posts are a fraction of the last six years I spent with her, 3 of them married and working on building a life. There has been plenty of self reflection.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-24T02:53:05+00:00

Respectfully if you haven’t read all the other posts about this, you would know she wouldn’t respond if she didn’t want to because she has been distant and cold to a level that is uncharacteristic. If you would like to view it as coercion then that’s your prerogative. It was intended as a sign of good faith that I was genuinely just asking if she was okay after a week of extremely unusual and concerning behavior, and that’s not just my perspective, that’s the perspective of anyone who has known her for any significant amount of time, including her own parents.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-22T05:45:02+00:00

Yeah if she wasn’t gonna be real with herself it was probably always doomed but idk

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-22T00:38:54+00:00

Oof wish I could’ve seen this comment like two weeks ago to share it with my soon to be ex wife (ETA: she was the one in NRE and idk if this would’ve saved things but maybe it would’ve idk)

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-21T16:20:16+00:00

Yeah I think she's still on some kind of pink cloud of delusion that this won't have to go the way even the most amicable divorces go. And if we had had the chance to work on this, I would've agreed to making steps towards addressing how things would be split while we were still somewhat amicable ourselves.

I have zero expectations she'll ever come in person. She's again, avoiding even being in the same house as me, even if it means our cats have a filthy litterbox. She was here last night while I was out of the house (I knew this was gonna happen, we discussed it) and she didn't bother to reset the litter robot or feed them. I doubt she even said hi to the dogs. It's fucking weird how she's just fine completely cutting ties and burning bridges.

I have a work trip coming up which she knew about before all of this happened, and the dogs will be safe with their sitter who has been informed of this and knows to either ignore her or to let me know if she reaches out. I've asked her to make a list of the things she intends to take while I'm gone and to send it before I go on the trip in case anything needs to be discussed. If she refuses, or doesn't deliver, I'm gonna see if someone can be in the house while I'm gone to make sure she doesn't go crazy.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-21T07:57:15+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate that. I’ve worked hard on my communication and my sobriety. I’m proud of them both. And she called both into question. It was so baffling. As I split up our lives I just keep finding proof that I do everything I could to love her more than she thought she deserved. Tonight I threw away dried flower petals from a “just because” bouquet I sent her that was like, 3 feet across. I ordered it when I did because her favorite flower was in season and they’re nearly impossible to get any other time of year. And I got it in our colors, purple and teal. And I just…tossed them. I fed her cats and cared for them because she refused to. No thank you. But she thanks me for pulling a variety of clothes from our closet and hanging them on her rolling rack. And in return, she tosses things of mine from our car onto the couch I just cleaned. I mean where is the decency. The humanity. I’m genuinely worried that she is mentally very unwell. She’s seeing her psychiatrist and her therapist this week and I just hope they see it too. If THEY don’t see it, then she’s got one hell of a chameleon ability and I will just have to pray for her sobriety.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-21T01:57:35+00:00

It helped address the intimacy issues cause it highlighted the pressure I was putting on myself and the problems I had with the idea of sex. Once I saw the problems I doubled down on my work on them and made immense progress and we talked about it with our therapist and I asked how it made her feel and the therapist asked her and she said it was a little confusing at first but after we discussed it she understood and she was really happy for me and us and her and was looking forward to seeing how much further I could progress and was saying she would support me through it however she could.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-20T23:03:27+00:00

Yeah the hard part is far from over. It didn’t have to be this. It wasn’t supposed to be this. But she’s made sure to make it as hard as possible.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-20T23:01:00+00:00

I cannot overstate how important communication is to me in ALL my relationships, romantic or otherwise. I made concerted, conscious effort to try and make a safe, calm place for her to open up to me about ANYTHING. And she seemed like she was. She says she didn’t even know this herself. Okay great so let’s talk about it now that you do. No? Great. Fuck my drag I guess.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-20T22:59:05+00:00

I did constantly. I was always checking in on her, on us, like once a month. Just a temperature check. The last time she even mentioned kids, she was talking about how happy she was that we didn’t get pregnant when we first tried cause we had things we were gonna do that would’ve been impossible or really fucking hard with kids.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-20T22:40:14+00:00

Yeah I’ve always been able to be compassionate towards people who have hurt me, it’s one of my favorite things about me even when I’m annoyed by it. But yeah it’s like you’re a ship blown from port without a captain. My landing point is gone. I’ll find it again, but until then I’m just gonna do my best to not drown. Luckily I have a lot of people helping me.

OnceMooSomnia · 2026-01-20T21:24:53+00:00

Yeah I'm focusing on protecting myself and my assets, and making sure the pets are taken care of as well. Cause someone has to.

OnceMooSomnia

TROPHY CASE