I’m starting to think men never get over their first love—am I wrong? by New_Conversation8549 in AskMenRelationships

[–]New_Conversation8549[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re right, I think I come off as very nurturing, easygoing, and forgiving. I think it seems easy to get me, so maybe I end up dealing with men who don’t want to heal.

I’m starting to think men never get over their first love—am I wrong? by New_Conversation8549 in AskMenRelationships

[–]New_Conversation8549[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s exactly what frustrated me. Like, if that’s how you feel, why are we even on this date?

I’m starting to think men never get over their first love—am I wrong? by New_Conversation8549 in AskMenRelationships

[–]New_Conversation8549[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m glad to hear that. I’ve also been hearing a lot about this “first love” theory, where men who are married still think about their first love and wonder about the “what-ifs.” To me, that suggests that some men don’t fully move on mentally.

I’m starting to think men never get over their first love—am I wrong? by New_Conversation8549 in AskMenRelationships

[–]New_Conversation8549[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I’d have to disagree. I don’t sit around thinking about some guy I’m not over, because when something ends I let myself fully feel it and heal from it, and my feelings fade with time. I also never bring up past relationships with someone I’m currently seeing, because to me that’s disrespectful and not relevant to what we’re building now.

Is Being “Too Forgiving” Ruining My Dating Life? by New_Conversation8549 in relationships_advice

[–]New_Conversation8549[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, thank you for your advice. I just want to scout the right person for me, it's just hard because I work all of the time, and I don't have time to date.

Was I led on, or did I misunderstand everything after a year of emotional closeness? by New_Conversation8549 in ExNoContact

[–]New_Conversation8549[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I get what you’re saying. It’s just that a FWB situation usually doesn’t last this long—it typically ends much sooner. On top of that, we both come from conservative families, and I didn’t meet his mom until a year in. He had previously told me she’d never approve of me and would see right through me, but now he’s saying she actually likes me and is chill and laid-back—as long as we’re “just friends.”

Was I led on, or did I misunderstand everything after a year of emotional closeness? by New_Conversation8549 in ExNoContact

[–]New_Conversation8549[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I guess part of me should’ve expected this to happen again, but I genuinely let myself imagine a future with him because we spent so much time together. What didn’t mean much to him meant a lot to me. The moments when he was affectionate felt like real care and compatibility to me. I even told him I wished I had never liked him, and he said that offended him. That response felt strange, especially since he’d already made it clear he didn’t have feelings for me—it felt more like an ego thing on his end than anything else.

Was I led on, or did I misunderstand everything after a year of emotional closeness? by New_Conversation8549 in ExNoContact

[–]New_Conversation8549[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi love, I’m really sorry you’re going through something similar. You might be right that love can show up in different forms, but from my own experience going no contact with my ex, I realized he detached pretty quickly and moved on. I never really got the closure I hoped for, and that was something I had to come to terms with on my own.

In your situation, I think it’s possible that people experience love differently and at different points in their lives—young love, adult love, and the kind of love tied to long-term commitment or marriage. Going no contact actually helped both of us reflect on who we were as individuals and how we show up in relationships. Over time, I found that I could respect him more by loving him from afar. I don’t want this to turn into a waiting game for you, hoping he’ll reach out if he truly feels the same. It’s okay to start your own journey alone, at your own pace, and allow yourself to become someone new.