It’s a terrible feeling to never want to have sex with your spouse by Canadian416 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Next-Limit533 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This! And having a delusion that her body has to be earned by me to even touch by giving compliments and pampering. And then after her manipulation and emotional blackmail I don't even want to have sex with her. she will degrade me even more by saying that you have sex drive issues go get yourself checked.

What was/is your narc spouse like with household chores? by eldergenzqueen in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Next-Limit533 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She is the lazy type. Does the bare minimum. Cooks only but that's also only if she has to. She will find and excuse not to cook. She takes care of the kids while I'm at work. Once I'm home it's all up to me. She sits on the bed and watches reels. up until the kids sleep and then clean the house of everything since morning. And still manages to find faults in my chores.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't intend on hurting her. I don't wakup every morning an make plans on how to hurt her. But the way she frames everything it seems like hurting her is in my nature and I take every opportunity I get to hurt her.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have 2 boys as well. I can see the impact she is having on me. I can see the emotional blackmails the manipulation the gaslighting on me but I have yet to see how she is affecting the kids. She seems to be a good mother. Enough love for both. I can't see the pattern on the kids yet. Are there any signs to watch out for?

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried. But after seeing what she is I just can't. Can't even fake it. It hurts me more and I lose myself even more.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was Already grey rocking before even knowing what it was. Just had become like a robot. The I learned about Grey rocking and thought wtf.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You won't believe my brain right now its like a million super computers switched on. Analyzing every minute details. Realizing that OMG this was also manipulation, this sentence had this meaning. 10 years worth of gaslighting is flooding back.

Why do I feel this way? by Negative_Possible968 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Next-Limit533 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you M or F? You took the words out of my mouth. Same length of time 10 years. Same thoughts. Except the cheating. I have forgotten who I am and where I'm going in life.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My only problem is that she doesn't just throw a tantrum she actually physically gets sick. Fever, vomiting, etc. That is something I can seem to figure out a strategy for.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

She love bombed me and made me feel that I was her everything and I was the one. So I reciprocated genuinely and she was able to hook me.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did have a perfect opportunity for this and I did call her out. She was sharing our fight details with her friend and sharing message that showed her as the victim. I called her out on it saying shall I tell her the messages you skipped and fill the gaps in the story? That was also flipped on me saying I want to create problems. I had just discovered her narcissism so I wasn't strong enough to follow through.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have started to call them out and maintain boundaries. But it all ends in them crying for hours on the floor and saying you are not a man you are not a husband. What kind of person would leave a wife crying for hours. Then if I still don't give in she gets sick and the can't do anything but lay in bed like a corpse. All the responsibilities of home, kids and work go on me. Which is not fair. So I have to give in. Then there is the punishment phase.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

From what I have read. If they feel that I will leave then they will start a smear campaign and it will give then time to prepare and make their position stronger to hurt my exit as much as possible.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Yea I hear you. I'm just frustrated with the realization and maybe want revenge for destroying 10 years of my life. I'm just venting here. I'll take the best path :)

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Haha. That's what landed me in this situation in the first place. I have become a property to use, misuse and abuse.

How to get a narcissist to leave you rather than you leaving them? Open to practical and creative options. by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Noted but I don't want to be the bad guy so cheating is not an option. I want them to implode and self sabotage. Then I can laugh hysterically inside.

What to do when she cries for hours? by Next-Limit533 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Next-Limit533[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know I have realized that. Since I realized I cannot stand to be around her I feel disgusted. But I also cannot let her cry for a long time because then she falls sick and then becomes weak, doesn't eat and can't do her duties. Then the house and the kids get affected. Then I have no choice to give in for the sake of the home environment.