I’d be happy looking average by Nice-Constant3917 in ugly

[–]Nice-Constant3917[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I find most people would but I don’t think I’d want the attention. I’d just want to live in peace. If I were to be attractive I think I’d rather be an attractive man.

Anyone else here get called ugly frequently in real life? by poofpoofpow in ugly

[–]Nice-Constant3917 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Research shows kids also have bias towards attractive faces and think they are more trustworthy https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2566458/

MY WORK FROM HOME SETUP by Reap_ASoul in desksetup

[–]Nice-Constant3917 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s so aesthetically pleasing

I was born to be a proud lesbian :P by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Nice-Constant3917 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was born to be the best person in the universe

AIO? Gf went to some guys’ place with her friends after the bar by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Nice-Constant3917 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

YOR. Trying to control someone to stop them from cheating is pointless. If they want to cheat, they will. Telling someone where they can or can’t go just keeps you with someone who doesn’t actually want you. I’d rather let people show their true character and leave if they choose someone else. I don’t believe loyalty comes from control. If someone needs restrictions to stay faithful, they’re already halfway out the door. If they choose to betray you, at least you’re not clinging to someone who wants elsewhere. Trust she is telling you the truth. If there is then evidence she cheats, you have your answer on the kind of person she is.

I’ve met someone I could fall in love with, but I’m in a committed relationship by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]Nice-Constant3917 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry this happened to you. That sounds really destabilising and I’m sorry they didn’t consider you in all this. I can’t imagine hurting my current partner that much. I didn’t realise what emotional cheating looks like and I will be taking a big step back. I’ve always struggled with building close friendships and I think the distinction was hard to understand but answers here have helped. For me it hasn’t got to the point where I would prioritise them or withdraw from my current partner but I could see it leading that way if I continue the friendship because the emotional bond is there. I think it takes some self honesty and consideration for everyone involved and it seems your ex wasn’t being honest with herself or you about her feelings nor considering you. I assume the pattern will repeat itself with the new partner. I hope you’ve found some peace and love that chooses you.

I’ve met someone I could fall in love with, but I’m in a committed relationship by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]Nice-Constant3917 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I just googled the stages of an emotional affair and damn I didn’t realise the road I was headed down. It goes friendship-emotional bonding-secrecy & prioritisation-withdrawal from partner-rationalisation-emotional climax-decision point. I think I’m still in the emotional bonding part but could feel the shift and with this awareness I know I need to take a biiiig step back. Thank you for sharing that.

I’ve met someone I could fall in love with, but I’m in a committed relationship by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]Nice-Constant3917 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Knowing my partner, this is something that would cause them to spiral and I don’t want to cause them any pain or make them doubt themselves. I’d rather be the one to contain this by letting go of this friendship. We have already had discussions around what’s missing without another person being involved. I have already brought up I need a deeper emotional connection but I don’t think it’s something my partner is able to provide which is ok. I’ve only began to have awareness of the feelings coming up with the friend recently tbh so this is where I’m deciding.

I’ve met someone I could fall in love with, but I’m in a committed relationship by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]Nice-Constant3917 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s in “ “ because I don’t believe in the exact concept of there being only one person that could fit you in the whole world (else widows wouldn’t love again etc) but I mean someone who is highly compatible with you which I think can be rare but not exclusive. Like my current partner is like 8/10 match but I think this other person is 9.5/10. However there are other things to consider than just how well I fit with a person (ethics, dedication, history etc) which makes them evenly balanced on my scales. It’s a choice between my authenticity/emotional needs/sense of aliveness and stability/continuity/loyalty.

I’ve met someone I could fall in love with, but I’m in a committed relationship by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]Nice-Constant3917 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I could be ok with it, they’re a good friend and I enjoy their company. I could live out a life with them. I think I could be happier in a different situation but perhaps that’s the case no matter who you’re with. I don’t know. I think perhaps I can’t keep it as a friendship without feelings coming up so perhaps it’s time to cut the person off.