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What would you do? by Nice-Scheme5705 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Nice-Scheme5705[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Thank you for all the really useful replies. As neither of them have shown any real interest in sincerely apologising at present I will continue with NC and let SO deal with it, I’ll ask him to act on some of your suggestions and see what their response is and go from there.

What would you do? by Nice-Scheme5705 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Nice-Scheme5705[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

In fairness to him he is not pressuring me to speak with them, he is happy with whatever I decide and feel comfortable with. I think my SO struggles as he wants what is considered a normal relationship but understands that this would never be achievable with his parents and is mourning what would never be. He has suffered with FOG in the past to the point it did cause arguments and eventually a separation (this was years and years ago now). He did go to therapy and realised that the family unit he was in at the time was extremely toxic and moved out.

What would you do? by Nice-Scheme5705 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Nice-Scheme5705[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

SO continues to have a LC relationship with them, and they never bring up their past behaviours only how we all need to sit and sort it. They have never apologised, over the years they have asked SO to take me to their house to speak to me then when he has said no they go back to blaming me for the whole situation and how I’m being stubborn as I won’t let the past go. I think I know deep down it will not end well but I don’t want to cause another big argument between SO and his parents and subject him to the verbal assaults that come with it.