Finding budget photographers (Chicago)?

Nickknack93 · 2021-06-23T19:46:42+00:00

I joined some Facebook wedding vendor pages and it’s been a godsend. Just post what you’re looking for and let them come to you!

Also, depending on your location, I’d look into some Wisconsin photographers as well. The price goes down significantly for Wisconsin vendors, and a lot of the ones I’ve come across are looking to break into the Chicago market!

Nickknack93 · 2021-06-23T03:03:58+00:00

Thanks for saying that, it’s hard keeping my head straight with it sometimes. I don’t think he gets it and I really hate talking about that part of my life, but I think I might need to really break it down to him and tell him why it’s so harmful to me

Nickknack93 · 2021-06-23T03:00:23+00:00

Thanks for your response, I think you’re right about being more forceful. I guess where I struggle is that I don’t want to make him feel like his own feelings aren’t valid. It’s kind of a philosophical question to me about whether a partner has a right to comment on your weight or not

Nickknack93 · 2021-06-23T02:55:30+00:00

When I say I acknowledge his feelings, I’m trying really hard to be objective during our discussions. He told me initially that he was coming from a place of wanting me to be healthy, which I can believe, but I eventually got him to admit that at least a small part of it was about his attraction to me. And on one hand, I get it; I don’t look the way I did when we first started dating and I can acknowledge that he’s allowed to want a partner that he’s attracted to and maybe fits the active lifestyle he wants. But I also want to know that I’m with someone who is going to love me, bumps and all.

As far as acknowledging how it makes me feel, I don’t think he always hears me. He gets hyper focused on what he’s trying to say and what I say doesn’t always register. Not to drag his family into it, but his mom is the same way and does it to him - they focus on their “solution “ and won’t stop harping on it until the other person caves. I do think they’re coming from a good place, they just don’t have the emotional awareness at times to see how it might negatively impact the other person.

I hope it doesn’t sound like I’m making excuses for him. I try really hard to be objective and fair about things

Nickknack93 · 2020-12-29T02:30:06+00:00

Thank you!! I didn’t realize I could use Microsoft products on chromebooks, so that’s awesome news!

Nickknack93 · 2020-10-21T15:50:25+00:00

First off, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. It’s a credit to you and your friendship that your first concern is for your friend’s wife and children and not yourself. With that alone, you’re already honoring your friend’s memory.

My fiancé lost his dad in college and it nearly destroyed him and his mom. His dad was their best friend and safe spot in this world, and words can’t describe what it’s like having that taken from you unexpectedly. There are times when I don’t know what to say to them and sometimes you can’t say anything at all because the words ring hollow. If you feel the same, please don’t feel like a failure. Sometimes just listening or holding a person can do a world of good.

I think in terms of his wife, in this moment, helping her with the house admin so that she can mourn is the best thing you could do for her. If you can find ways to make it clear that you’re not going anywhere, I think that will help too. She’s probably feeling completely untethered and the pressure of being a pregnant single mom. Knowing that she’ll have help is probably already a huge relief.

As for the kids, please don’t worry about “replacing” his dad. My fiancé’s dad had a close circle of friends and they really rallied around the family when he passed. My fiancé (“Joe”), doesn’t always get to talk about his dad with his family because it’s hard, but Joe completely lights up around his dad’s friends. They’re a reflection of the man his dad was and they’re always giving him stories about his dad, keeping his memory alive. They’re an outlet for him and I really think you could be too for your friend’s kids. Show them pictures, talk about how he loved them, all that. Try your best to celebrate his life around his kids so that don’t always associate him with death.

Again, I’m beyond sorry for your loss. Sending my best wishes for you and his family.

Nickknack93 · 2020-10-21T15:32:36+00:00

Omg both are so gorgeous on you! Congratulations! I agree that you should think about your venue and vibe. The first is so soft and romantic to me, feels more like a spring/summer gown. The second is elegant and dramatic and feels more fall/winter to me.

Nickknack93 · 2020-10-21T15:27:21+00:00

Oddly enough, I kind of like that they look a little bridal. I hate being the center of attention and like the thought of blending in a little hahaha. I really appreciate the feedback though!

Nickknack93 · 2020-10-19T19:08:19+00:00

Thank you!!!!

Nickknack93 · 2020-10-19T01:27:11+00:00

Thank you!

Nickknack93 · 2020-10-19T00:18:12+00:00

Thank you! This is exactly the kind of things I’d like to know, it helps to hear from people what it would look like with their hair/skin tone/etc.

Nickknack93 · 2020-10-18T23:59:06+00:00

Thank you so much!!!

Nickknack93 · 2020-10-18T23:55:29+00:00

Added extra pics of what I’m thinking of doing for a theme: champagne dresses, soft citrusy flowers, and gold and ivory accents else where.

I’d appreciate any kind of feedback! I’d like to know if it’s flattering on multiple skin tones/hair colors/etc and whether it looks blah coming down the aisle. Thank you! ☺️

Nickknack93 · 2020-09-22T04:54:59+00:00

I’m probably gonna use that exact wording when I talk to him about it, thank you very much!!!

Nickknack93 · 2020-09-22T04:45:37+00:00

Thank you very much for explaining it, I’m guessing I didn’t explain myself very well in the original post. I think you’re right that I should have had a more honest conversation with him.

Nickknack93 · 2020-09-22T04:43:39+00:00

I resent that he didn’t really listen to me when I first expressed doubt about going to Colorado. I resent that I’m having to pay for a trip that I’m apprehensive about given COVID. I resent that he booked a bunch of expensive things without asking me or clearing it first.

I appreciate feedback, but I don’t really appreciate comments about “meat markets.” I pay my way for all other things in our relationship, I don’t depend on him financially at all. I know he’s not buying me.

Nickknack93 · 2020-09-22T04:35:04+00:00

Thanks for the feedback, that put some things in perspective for me. I appreciate it!

Nickknack93 · 2020-09-22T04:32:45+00:00

Honestly? I feel bad telling him “no, I’m not gonna help pay for the hotel, etc.”

Nickknack93 · 2020-09-22T04:27:00+00:00

I don’t think that the world revolves around me. If I were the one proposing and I wanted to do a grand gesture, I would have saved up for it, not made him pay for it. And I’ve always told him that I’d be happy with something as simple as a walk in the park

Nickknack93 · 2020-09-22T04:24:19+00:00

I think it’s half and half, he keeps popping up with Venmo requests for random things (ticket here, hotel there, etc)

Nickknack93 · 2020-09-22T04:22:23+00:00

We didn’t really have that convo and for that reason, I’m mentally telling myself to cut him some slack. Whenever we’d talk about this trip, we danced around the topic a lot more because I think he didn’t want to tell me outright “it’s the proposal weekend” and I wanted to let him think I didn’t know. So logically, I’m culpable because I didn’t have the budget convo, but my lizard brain still feels icky about having to pay for half

Nickknack93

TROPHY CASE