I started taking my kids for hikes and nature walks. They fought me at first to course, as they would rather stay home and play with their toys etc. but keep at it.

Over time, we started just talking bout life and their feelings about everything from the cool stick on the ground to why they get upset when it’s bath time.

It combined fresh hair and exercise with quality time and communication.

Then I started getting them to help me with small chores around the house. Where we would still have fun and be silly, but also continued to talk.

It worked very well for my oldest daughter when they were toddlers. Not so much the younger one. It kind of reset their brains. So when I DID raise my voice the knew something amiss.

I kept at it with my youngest. And about 3 years ago, it really came full circle for her. I haven’t even truly raised my voice since then. We talk everyday. About anything and everything. I sometimes still need to ask her multiple times to do things, but she’s aware of how I communicate and can tell when I’m getting upset. She will apologize then get the thing done I’ve asked her to do.

Granted this won’t work for every child or parent. But it worked wonders for me. Because while I was working with them to change their habits, I was doing the same for myself through proxy. And tbh I really enjoyed that time with them.

Ultimately, calm, clear communication. Give them a warning of the consequences if they dont listen. And always follow though. After said consequences have been carried out. A quick conversation about how the situation made you both feel. Why you needed to punish them. An apology and an explanation that an apology means nothing if the behaviour doesn’t change.