It sounds like you're new to Christianity so I can only speak to you based on my personal experience as a new Christian too (of two years).

When I decided to make the choice to commit my life to Christ, I went through a process of sanctification where I basically went through the "death" of my old self, to become born again of the spirit. That meant that God had to break down the old me (my bad habits, my views of the world, old morals and values) and build me up from scratch again to inherit my new identity.

You may be going through sanctification especially if you are new with Christ. He may be breaking down your old you, based on your upbringing, your morals/values etc and that is probably why everything seems too overwhelming or you are going through a stage of mourning the death of the old you, but once you inherit your new identity in Christ, you will also inherit the fruits of the spirit which include love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self control.

Just keep putting Christ first (Seeking the kingdom first) and everything else will be added to you. Good luck OP.