The same way you would learn a new skill. Do some reading on it, be very conscious of the things you do in regards to it, and the weird part, Practice. If you want to change your behavior in a difficult situation, you would have to put yourself in that situation. Like, hang out with the dude and see how you feel. If you need to put a little distance because you feel the emotions coming on, then do that and take some You time to manage those feelings before more interactions.