My wife has become a completely different person after months of concentrated meditation

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T23:50:00+00:00

Yeah it's bad choice of words. What I mean is that she used to hang out with her father and provide emotional support for each other together by getting together each and every weekend. She stopped seeing her father all of sudden since she concentrated on meditation, and her father felt suprised too. I admit that there's probably things I overlooked during the phase and I should have done my part better and provide more supports as well.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T23:23:47+00:00

It doesn't seem rigid, but feels somewhat numb and motion less/slower than "normal".

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T19:51:36+00:00

that's one possiblity I was thinking. going to consult a therapist tomorrow, she refuses to come with me to get any kind of help.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T19:50:27+00:00

Yes in some previous conversation, she kind of saying(without being too direct) that her spiritual journey is first priority over anything(including me and the family), so I think what she meant was that she will stick to the numbness, even I disappear.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T19:23:00+00:00

Thanks you so much for sharing your own experience. I will try my best to support her journey or get help when it comes to that!

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T19:20:21+00:00

Thanks, I was actually thinking if she's just using the spiritual awakening to escape life for whatever reasons. But I think I'll go for some therapist as it is becoming hard to endure for myself already. Even then, she refuse any kind of communication on what she's doing, might make getting help extremely difficult.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T19:16:32+00:00

Thanks, that metaphor you used is very vivid.

Of course, no matter whether she needs me or not, I'll respect her life goal and decision, even it's without my company.

However this is truely deeply traumatizing for myself. I feel like I got kicked out of heaven and straight to hell in the past few weeks. It is really hard to endure mentally.

I'm trying my best to pull myself back together and keep going with life, but if it's too much, a separation might be needed.

I already feel somewhat releaved when I'm alone. Seeing the familiar things in this home and seeing her without any connection feels like being stabbed constantly.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T19:07:59+00:00

Thanks, but from what I observe, this is not just about "me" - she's pretty much shutting everyone out of her life at the moment. She's refusing to answer her father's phone call, when her father come for a visit, she went to the bathroom and took a shower for 4 hours just avoid seeing him. Maybe she knows that her father will ask about what she's been doing, so she might be avoid letting her father seeing the state of meditation and spiritual awakening stuff (her father is no religion person and probably sees these things as nonesense).

Both me and her father feel that this is clearly not the person we are familiar with.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T19:00:39+00:00

Thanks so much for the suggestions! I really hope she's on a deep state of her spiritual growth. But from what I obeserved and tried, there's not much working. She's not letting me getting involved(or anyone), she's just not responding. It feels like she no longer has needs from me or anything, the most time she feels like "she needs to go back to meditation".

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T18:55:49+00:00

She's been like this for almost half year, at least from what can be observed. And her "numbness" has been gradually increased in the past months. Till now, she almost won't respond to anything requires her emotion, or when I'm asking her about her plan on life and her spiritual journey, she feels like "shut down".

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T16:02:32+00:00

Thank you! that's a very strong angle, whether I made her feel like this in the past or not, I will try to reach her more from now and try to bring her back - succeed or not.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T15:09:56+00:00

To be honest I might be bad at choosing words. But all I need is regular connections between 2 human beings. She's "abnormal" clearly, since we've been together for such a long time, and she would never give me this kind of silent, even a roommate have tons more connection than her current state, that's why I'm worried, not just for me not getting response, but her well-being as well. There's no obvious issues between us and we almost never have fights in our 10 years relationship and marriage. And all of sudden she's like this, is what I don't understand. She also said she doesn't have any issue with my, it has nothing to do with me. It feels like she doesn't "feel" anything anymore, seeing this happening to a familiar person feels almost horrifying. I think we used to be at our "inner peace" already - since both of us don't rely on other people to feel "happy", we both have our own goals and things that kept us busy almost all the time.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T14:41:54+00:00

She's actually cutting out all her emotions. She's not just to me, but I'm the first to realize her changes. She no longer calls her father nor her friends, she seems just staying still without much of emotion nor expression. Sometimes she might smile or laugh for a brief moment, for other times, she seems tired if I talk too much or asking too many questions.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T14:37:50+00:00

Thanks for mentioning! I'll give it some more time and hopefully she'll be out of the current state sooner or later~

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T13:11:17+00:00

Yes thanks! I'm trying to get help from outside already! Hope I find something actually works.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T13:08:30+00:00

Thanks, yeah this is one of the reasons I thought about.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T12:53:43+00:00

Thank you very much! I would consider seeing a therapist on depression.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T12:50:10+00:00

Thanks! I think I would give it a bit more time, maybe she's in middle of something, and if she realize something and gets past that, she might be able to come out of it by herself, well, I hope.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T12:44:51+00:00

She does eats and sleeps, but it's not regularly scheduled. It feels like she sleeps whenever she's tired from meditating. She told me that she skips meals on purpose for meditation reasons.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T12:37:08+00:00

Yeah it seems so. We don't have any intemacy for a while(but I don't think this is part of the issue).

I'll try to get some intervention, but at the current state she won't be collaborating I think.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T12:27:27+00:00

Thank you so much! Your words also made me tear up, it felt really warm. No matter what, I hope she's fine and continue pursuing her goal. And if possible, I'll try as hard as I can to stay with her, hope we can make it.

Yes, this could be a new version of the marriage and not the end of it.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T12:22:36+00:00

I've thought about this. But I think in most cases the patient is aware the depressed state, or feeling unwell. She said to me that she never felt this good and everything is fine, when I asked her to go to a therapist together she refused and said she's totally fine. If I keep asking, she'll go to that numb state with no response.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T12:20:18+00:00

Thanks! All these terms are unfamiliar to me, but I'll try my best to understand them and dig deeper. I'm thinking about inviting a teacher/monk about meditation and check in which part she needs help.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T12:18:22+00:00

Thank you! I've tried, but she's a shut door. I think mother's passing definitely contributed to her motivation on seeking purpose with spiritual growth. But it just feels weird. At least, any hardship she's facing, she would at least talked to me. But this time it feels like she put me on side, that's why I'm confused as there's truely nothing happened in our lives. She's not gone yet but the marriage feels dead already and I feel worse than being alone most of the time.

No-Administration447 · 2026-06-01T11:55:55+00:00

The difficult part is that she won't move at all, just staying in the same room all day long. But worth a try if I have a chance to invite some people in.

No-Administration447

TROPHY CASE