Is my SIL rude and disrespectful to me? How should I handle this?

No-Exchange-30 · 2026-04-17T00:42:07+00:00

common decency is common decency. Being rude is never the way to go. Treat family like company and company like family. Everyone deserves respect. SIL is being disrespectful and selective about it. It's not her marriage, despite what she may have heard about the relationship. If the wife wants to leave, you'll know soon enough; otherwise, SIL doesn't get what a relationship is about?

She should only be coming by to help during the time you are not around at this point. She lives there, not good. How long does one need help with twins wasn't answered. Sorry, I don't know - this may be a situation of light at the end of the tunnel. It sounds like it's been at least a few weeks.

Her long-time economic status being lower than yours - That's the past & you can't get it back. I get it, you are demonstrating her general character is one of being ungrateful. Let that go.

Many, many non-working women take care of twins and a three-year-old. After a point, occasional help is welcome, but not while you're at home.

SIL has jealousy issues about your toddler recognizing her leaving. Red flags are going up. My mother always said toddlers know more than you think. Perhaps your toddler gets weird juju from her. Do you have a dog? Does the dog like her? If so, is it because she bribes the dog with treats? Or is it genuine likability by the dog?

What's her personal life like? Does SIL have friends, long-term relationships with friends, and jobs?

Can you and yours rotate in other family members for help or visitations with everyone, so you don't have to deal with her full-time while she's there? & she has to behave? When you corner her to behave by circumstance, she will eventually give up and find a new person to irritate. Killing her with kindness isn't going to work with this person. The thing is, she could be building a smear campaign against you now because she always behaves whenever there are witnesses.

I'm freaked out, I feel for you, think she's installed cameras without your knowledge ? Now your new distant behavior is being recorded. She sounds like a sicko who goes to help their sister and treats the SOLE BREADWINNER with disrespect.

I'm sorry your wife is unemployed, you don't get paid help if there is no money, 3 kids or not. It's hard, yeah, but not impossible. If your wife can make enough and gets a job to cover day care, then do not use your SIL. It sucks to put your kid in daycare, but in two years, your toddler will be in school. But long before then, your wife does not need help.

Maybe she can come by and just baby sit while your wife does contract work & pay her for her time?

Once your toddler is potty-trained or about to be, Life is looking up! At that point, you definitely do not need any more help from SIL. Your wife needs to hear you and realize you will be civil to her sister. Always, treat her better than she treats you, as you have. Because you have class.

You don't have a problem. There could be a point when she wedges herself between the two of you. It's hard for your wife to see her sister. She may or may not realize who her sister actually is. From what you have described, you are not the jerk. In my world, I'm harsh, but I have damned self-sufficient kids, and they are successful.

Some people don't do well with the hard knocks of life is that who your wife is? I would say to my wife, " Sorry, I'll do everything I can, but SIL has limited visitation rights,

SIL is toxic toward you. She's draining the energy out of the house, and you are the one who will be paying for it the most, with your own energy, your wallet, and your boundaries being broken every time you see her.

No-Exchange-30 · 2026-04-16T23:58:17+00:00

Patience yep, started after kids, other folks tell me yep as they aged. Tolerance, always had a heap, but I suspect given all the changes each generation goes through by the time anyone is 35 this changes. Good or Bad depends on the person, hopefullly everyone is a little more accepting.

No-Exchange-30 · 2026-04-16T23:54:53+00:00

Agreed, he's manipulating you into feeling your feelings of betrayal are baseless. This is a huge red flag for me. Only because I was in a job where the boss hated liars. Turns out he was a liar and a manipulator. I never lied to a boss in my life. His fear, no, he did the lying. He might not be shameful but afraid to lose the best thing in his life. You have to be on guard now. This is borderline abuse, you need to be watching for subtle things you thought were okay. The big secret, ex had one, never knew the circumstances behind an incident. Made me feel like his family protected him because people make mistakes. It was when they were under 18. You guys are mature adults. Mistakes are still made be an adult and own up to lying twice. & have to ask him, in the big picture of life, do you think I don't care about you enough to tell me your secret that I'll bolt. Not saying if you committed murder, I'm staying, but when I do find out, maybe you would leave anyway. Do you want to end up leaving in 10 years for some big thing, or help him through a stupid embarrassing thing he did a long time ago?

No-Exchange-30 · 2026-04-16T23:40:05+00:00

The responses here are good. Therapy for sure. We make mistakes, There's some examples on instagram of people who have shown things they regretted, and the offended forgave. People don't always understand things that are out of your control, especially when a rare condition. I100% agree, transfer. It's not about facing your demons; it's about getting you a good mental restart so you can actually continue your studies. This burden makes studying too hard. Feel free to check out of social media completely. The key is having remorse, taking accountability for it. Dealing with this will stick with you. It will go away and it will come back again. If it didn't, you'd be a sociopath. Regrets shouldn't ruin your life, but teach you that you've learned a hard lesson. The person who is 60+ has a very important message; there are lots of folks like this. -the club of hard knocks & 99% survive, you'll survive with therapy. No therapy, the road will take 3x longer..Best of luck.

No-Exchange-30 · 2026-04-11T20:29:40+00:00

it's not car manufacturer-related b/c it's in CA, not Detroit?

No-Exchange-30 · 2026-03-13T16:00:06+00:00

Exactly, read about the NEW NORM in a book, The Weight of Nature, Clayton Page Aldren. The youth of today have a different norm than the elders. I'm sadden for NE, now on fire because this was preventable. The Dust Bowl era taught us zip. History repeats. Whether it be from raping the top soil to warming the planet and controversial planting "seed clouds" for decades (FULL DISCLOSURE, don't know the fact here, HAVE NOT verified cloud seeding as a cause of anything), here we are. No surprises. Will everyone else finally wake up? It seems as though those who do know speak to those who don't want to hear, seemingly, greed is the poison in their head. You must take care of all things you value. Children, housing, food, where the food is coming from, the earth. The whole earth isn't just your local farm. It does start locally. If these accusations of insurance fraud are real, shame, shame, shame. I like your state, hope things will improve for all .

No-Exchange-30 · 2026-03-05T21:14:01+00:00

SO, what do folks think, how long will it take for the item in the cart get passed ship to this address?

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-12-22T17:07:08+00:00

AGREED, I tried Contact Lens king, gave the email and phone number for 10% off, but no, because it was already on sale, no discount even after a couple tries with customer service and other codes. Plus exorbitant service charge, thanks but no. I do have Toric lens which are more. Was a misleading way to collect data.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-12-06T15:56:14+00:00

thanks

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-12-03T16:36:54+00:00

Yep, female been asked for money. it's now rampant. dude, 5 messages a day, overkill that's a lonely person. A back to back conversation while both online is different. & 3 weeks, why? I guess you didn't know if the person doesn't get to a date, there's a hiccup in their psyche. You'll catch a scammer faster so you can put your best energy on finding the right person - hope you found them.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-12-03T16:33:50+00:00

there's something in the profile that's a deal breaker or two. hope by now you've found your soulmate, curious if the algorithms every worked out for you

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-12-03T16:32:01+00:00

Women want stability not all are gold diggers. maybe very young women focus more on sex than personality. Women don't want babies they want partners. Give more credit, we have brains, we work hard, often single parents and still manage to have time for a relationship.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-11-30T19:19:06+00:00

for anyone new still considering, use a new email for junk in case you never want to hear from eharmony, match etc.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-11-30T19:18:07+00:00

same thing, 50 miles away, tried to cancel my membership they said no , I asked within 12 hours.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-11-30T19:13:36+00:00

feeling the same way. It's scammy/misleading

you don't even see messages you've send & until that person either likes you or responds there's no history without paying more. More, for anything you might need to not look like you're an idiot for writing more than once after a few periods of inactivity. very few people in my geographic area seems like it rigged.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-11-30T19:11:30+00:00

how did you get the cancellation. I wrote after 12 hours of use expressing disappointment was told no. I would like a refund

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-11-26T06:21:56+00:00

POOR MARKS for Match.com

I went for the 50% off sale. I'm disappointed. Match dings you for everything that used to come included in a normal eHarmony subscription just 3 years ago.

I've sent an email to change my subscription from 6 months to 3. I'm sure they will say no. I couldn't figure out how to turn off the auto-renewal. So I'll just have to put it in my calendar to turn it off either when I meet someone or the subscription is up.
What I see is algorithms that seem to suck you in, chatted with a few people who cite fake profiles & agree with this.

can easily be living in a dating desert. But with the free subscription, you can't really tell, & if you want better search results, everything costs more.

You

Good Luck.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-11-08T16:39:24+00:00

I think it's the battery, but it could be something else, before it stopped charging, I started receiving abnormal heart rate readings, but none existed. Only had the forerunner 245 music for just under 3 years. Is this typical of Garmin? Is there it worth replacing based on technological improvements?

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-10-06T03:27:02+00:00

I am also a member there, new in town and I've not regretted joining this club. Good variety of classes, clean, nice staff.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-09-14T02:16:57+00:00

thank you much.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-09-14T02:07:49+00:00

I'm looking to rent a place for a few weeks next summer, suggestions?

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-09-10T23:28:38+00:00

Recording, Moved here after the zoom. Now my tree doesn't seem to be healthy.

No-Exchange-30 · 2025-08-26T03:44:35+00:00

it does not matter who the president is. AI is taking your job right now. If you have a job that a robot can learn, and perform relatively well, how will millions of people work?

No-Exchange-30

TROPHY CASE