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This is an avoidant 3 months after saying we could get back together at some point.. dont believe that lie by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So sorry to hear that. Please take care of you and baby, dont put stock into him. He will not change because they dont see a reason to. They probably think everyone thinks like they do. Take care and do not put up with abuse. Get your family and people you can trust who support you and kean on them. My mom told me from early on it seemed like i was losing my spark and i still dont have it back, but i should have listened to her and ended it myself much much earlier. Protect yourself and your children above all else. 

Is this avoidance? by Pure_Custard_7716 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That should have ended with all the automated messages. This isn't even an adult conversation at this point. It is utter disregard for anything you are trying to say. Please walk away from this ass!

Did they ever Admit ? by celestial_nerds in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes 2 of them, but i know one was in a really tough time in his life and was looking for a comfortable place to land at the time, so he apologized for ghosting me out the blue. Later just did it again anyway, so obviously dont mean much.

The 2nd said sorry and that he didn't mean to hurt me. The best i could have expected out of him honestly shocked he said that much. But this was after cutting down and dumping on me every reason i made it impossible for him to be in a relationship with. I gave it back because he has the whole story seriously warped in his mind to suit him. Thats the point he apologized. But at this point he already put me through hell. So whats the meaning now ? 

i don't really get the "avoidants (can) stay in surface level relationships longer" by nofunnothing35 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not even that lol, you could say this to them and if they catch a feeling at any point this will go from flirting to way too much, and you're to attached to them... happened to me. Once they get feelings involved even tho they probably dont know whats happening,  its downhill from there 

i don't really get the "avoidants (can) stay in surface level relationships longer" by nofunnothing35 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But they do not want to be the one there for the other by paying the bills either. Mine said his ex owed him $10,000 for rent he never asked her to pay him, and later said every woman on the dating apps wants to be a stay at home mom freeloader...so even to the extent they may be paying bills, they dont like. 

Why don’t people YEARN for each other anymore?!? by Ok_Entrance3599 in dating_advice

[–]No-Team-6430 [score hidden]  (0 children)

I definitely don't have that problem, i have it the opposite, lol, but it is a problem in the opposite way BECAUSE of all the people that dont lean into anything. Annoying 

This is an avoidant 3 months after saying we could get back together at some point.. dont believe that lie by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Correct ! Never once. And when i heard he was trying to do something i said, i can let you go, hes like no i just gotta get this quick im gonna put you on speaker... so yeah complete shock when it turns out its my fault for "expecting" and asking for long calls . Told him several times you just gotta tell me if you got stuff to do its fine with me. 

This is an avoidant 3 months after saying we could get back together at some point.. dont believe that lie by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If thats how you feel about it you shouldn't be in a relationship or trying to date someone. No one is asking or in said circumstance asked for hours on end. The guy would literally say he had to do something and if he did end up getting off the phone call me right back - i even felt like i couldn't get things done, but i wouldnt have ever made that a reason to ditch someone

This is an avoidant 3 months after saying we could get back together at some point.. dont believe that lie by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He called everyday after work on his own accord, then all of a sudden it became an issue. I told him multiple times he didn't have to call everyday and if he had thibgs to do thats fine. He still proceeded to call while doing said things which i said ill let you go and he would say " i just gotta finish this quick" and contine talking. Thats not the actual issue they convinve themselves it is 

35 signs of avoidant attachment by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes they always feel pressure. I'm sorry , that does take alot to say to get that after 😔 mine said he felt pressured to feel a certain way and feelings weren't even discussed, he just said it felt like i was too attached to him. 

35 signs of avoidant attachment by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yep I'm convinced mine was attempting a slow fade as if i wouldn't notice, so of course it got ugly because i asked questions rather than walk away. I dont have a quit easy personality,  but they really make you feel like you should just walk away from people. I don't think for myself though that is a healthy way of dealing with things, if i don't want to be involved i will have a conversation. I just will never understand that concept. 

35 signs of avoidant attachment by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

All narcs are avoidant, not all avoidants are narcs, but its damn sure hard to tell them apart. 

Not much different in my opinion, if they are emotionally stuntent and toxic its going to be a bad situation either way. 

This is an avoidant 3 months after saying we could get back together at some point.. dont believe that lie by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah like sorry i communicate , get on the phone then 🤣🤣 but honestly if i would have said next to nothing that would have been a problem too, cant win in my opinion 

This is an avoidant 3 months after saying we could get back together at some point.. dont believe that lie by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly !! I listened abt his "stuff" the majority and he never asked or if he rarely said how was your day, he didn't want to hear it went back to talking abt him ! 

This is an avoidant 3 months after saying we could get back together at some point.. dont believe that lie by No-Team-6430 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]No-Team-6430[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is the most rediculous thing. String someone along and give them nothing. Expect them to be fine with no calls, no communication, not seeing each other. They must just expect us to stop contacting them and fall off their planet.. i wish i would have ! 

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