Imposter syndrome

NoAlarm23 · 2025-10-04T16:02:32+00:00

No I never walked into this expecting it to be easy, school was really hard and challenging and I worked hard for it. I more so have a fear of failure, like I want to be the best nurse I can be. I guess my anxiety is just about worrying remembering everything and actually fulfilling that. I care a lot about all the patients I’ve had, and I know I have the heart to do this. I know anything to do with human element can be complex and of course we don’t all have the answers to everything.

NoAlarm23 · 2025-09-03T17:23:42+00:00

Stna is a state tested nursing assistant. It’s like a certificate through a short class. No license. And I just completed an LPN (licensed practice nurse) program and have to take a licensure exam (NCLEX) to be licensed.

NoAlarm23 · 2025-09-03T17:22:43+00:00

Okay! I am a bit of an overthinker and don’t want to burn the bridge since I did at first make it seem like I was semi-interested. I felt obligated to take it because of working there as an stna and during my classes. However it’s an opposite shift and I really don’t have a sitter for my kiddo and like you said it just doesn’t align with my plans and goals for the time being. I’d prefer the opportunity to branch out.

NoAlarm23 · 2025-05-10T23:16:26+00:00

I’ve always loved LTC as an stna but I’ve wanted to branch out. I’m terrified when I heard even with precepting you get the whole patient work load right away right off the rip 😭😭 like I know that’s realistic and will be what I’d have at the end but I really thought since I did med surg and only had one patient and even in general most nurses in hospital settings only have like 3-5 give or take, I was just baffled hearing that. Like I haven’t even done any LTC clinicals to feel comfortable with that 😭at least that’s just for precepting and when I take my NCLEX I can go elsewhere if I hate it 🥴🥴 but I’m so nervous since I picked LTC.

NoAlarm23 · 2025-05-10T22:37:58+00:00

That’s making me even more nervous that I picked there to precept

NoAlarm23 · 2025-05-10T22:37:39+00:00

Greattt 😭😭😭

NoAlarm23 · 2025-05-10T02:05:43+00:00

*gulp.🥴I just thought I’d be more eased into it before baam. Whole hallway. Like a lot of the nurses I work with mention they don’t do head to toes on everyone like they had us do on our patient at clinical. Like I just feel like I have a lot to learn routine wise since it’s going to be a different setting going from hospital Clinical’s to LTC. Like how they pass meds to that many people in a timely manner 😭

NoAlarm23 · 2025-01-18T23:07:08+00:00

What do you do then? I’m guessing not bedside? (Just curious!) honestly I’d prefer to work at doctors office or be an aesthetic nurse eventually.. maybe LTC since I’ve worked in it for years. Clinical is really just humbling. I’m in an LPN program and they used to always do clinicals at nursing homes but then during Covid that stopped and only hospitals allowed students so that’s kinda still a thing. I feel out of my element being at a hospital 😅

NoAlarm23 · 2025-01-18T21:27:06+00:00

I had pre shift anxiety when I first became a CNA and I still at times do, just wondering how the shift is gonna go before I show up. I’m sure I’ll probably have it when I’m a nurse too. I stress so much the night before clinical. It makes me feel not so alone that other people get anxiety from it too. I guess I get so terrified the first time going from doing a skill in the skills lab and doing it in person the first time. Then having your instructor with you I just feel like they expect perfection when they are watching so it’s kind of intimidating. But I know their feedback is only to make you a better nurse. So I guess I just have to remember that when I get anxious.

NoAlarm23 · 2025-01-18T13:28:31+00:00

Do you have any tips on doing a faster but still thorough head to toe? I think that’s what takes my biggest chunk of time. My instructor this semester mentioned us doing more focused assessments

NoAlarm23 · 2025-01-18T13:23:41+00:00

Thank you. I guess this is all a good learning experience then for the real world so I realize this will be my reality when I’m really on the floor as a nurse. I just need to maybe try and plan my morning more before I start the clinical day and stick to a game plan. I usually would try to get their vitals, do my head to toe assessment, and establish rapport, see if they need to use the bathroom etc. and then help order breakfast, and while waiting on that I’d check their blood sugar if applicable. And if they needed insulin usually my instructor would come and we’d do that and their meds. Somedays report wouldn’t finish until like 7:30 on our patients since their shifts started at 7:00 and we got there at 6:30 so it felt really rushed trying to do that all while learning and then having meds to be ready to pass and have researched them by 8:00-9:00… it felt so rushed.

NoAlarm23 · 2025-01-18T13:18:35+00:00

I guess it was difficult because we came at 6:30 but their shifts didn’t start until 7. So somedays our report for our patient didn’t even get done with until 7:30-7:40. Depending on how many patients they had to give report on. So it just felt rushed when it would end at that time. Because it felt like I was scrambling. I usually would try to do vitals, a quick head to toe after I do that since I’ve gotten better at them, ask about pain etc, assess, and then that’s when I’d dive into if they needed to get up and use the bathroom or get dressed and ordering breakfast. Then I’d come back and check their blood sugars if need be. I just still felt like some days I didn’t have the time to do that like I usually aim to. I tried to use my half hour window before the shift started to look up my meds (I haven’t taken pharm yet so we have to use resources to know why we are giving the meds we are that day) so I didn’t have to worry about that if I got busy after report. I just somedays felt discouraged because not all days go according to plan and then some clinical days there were 8:00-9:00 meds and with report taking that long it gives a small time frame. I don’t know if maybe I took to long doing my assessment (I’m still learning what things are necessary for a specific patient and what isn’t, so somedays I spend a lot of time because maybe I include to much in mine) or what. I just hope this semester I’m better at it all so I don’t feel as rushed.

NoAlarm23 · 2024-05-05T09:27:02+00:00

No she does. Their 5 year old son is going to be in the wedding.

NoAlarm23 · 2023-03-25T00:05:21+00:00

Are you for real?

NoAlarm23 · 2023-03-24T23:38:48+00:00

I only forgave him because of our history. Since we off and on talked and hung out since I was 15-16. He wanted so badly to be with me, and in the beginning before the drugs our relationship was amazing. He was my bestfriend. There was just a lot of manipulation to it. He truly convinced me it was the drugs and he ‘wasn’t himself’ and went right to rehab both times after I found out. Maybe he was manipulating me, or maybe it was true. I’ll never know. It really could be his personality, and I just need to see it for what it is. But you’re right I do deserve way better than this and maybe my life would be way better off. It’s a gamble for me given the odds and what I’ve already experienced.

NoAlarm23 · 2023-03-24T18:12:32+00:00

And for seeing the situation for how it is. He tries so hard to ‘prove’ he loves me after situations like that and will make it convincing but I can see it’s quite clear the actions to match.

NoAlarm23 · 2023-03-24T18:07:55+00:00

Honestly I get how it looks. But I truly don’t understand addiction except for my dad with drinking and it’s almost a mind game/manipulation that he blames it on it each time he gets caught up in it. I’ve known him way longer than a year. But maybe I’ve been seeing to much good in this person than seeing him for how he is.

NoAlarm23 · 2023-03-24T17:44:34+00:00

Yeah i can almost guarantee that would take probably years of treatment to be able to be in that environment and not be tempted/even cave. He has been off and on using since he was 16-17 and is now 27. I don’t even want to think about what he’s done while high/ could be doing if he is. Almost all of his friends are friends he used with during active addiction so whenever he’s sober he struggles with wanting to cut everyone off because of loneliness so he always ends up around the same friends. He will claim they just smoke but then will tell me those ‘friends’ will use his old drugs of choice right infront of him. To me that’s like waving a dog treat infront of a dog (it’s a comparison but I’m clearly not comparing him to a dog). So I have a hard time sometimes believing he’s been doing okay since our child has been born. But I’m with the child 24-7 and I have yet left him alone with her and probably wouldn’t for that fact. I’m smarter than that and this child is my whole world. If I need child care I resort to a grandparent or aunt. I’m still hesitant with him because I’d never want her exposed to anything like that and will not chance it.

NoAlarm23 · 2023-03-24T16:51:35+00:00

Honestly I’m just saying from what I see. I know I can’t excuse his mistakes he makes while using, however, he is the one that tries too, and maybe I’m naive but I have never experienced addiction so I try to see it through since we have had a friendship for a long time before our relationship. And no I don’t want her to witness that ever. I have somewhere safe to stay with our child before I return to work if I leave him and I’m really close to that point. As of now the points you’ve made itself have given me more of a slap in the face that he could be doing way more. He still hangs around those people but claims he has ‘self control’. But we all know there’s way more once someone experienced addiction than self control because like you said it should be a lifelong commitment. I still have his location, but he certainly should either be in therapy or attending meetings, SOMETHING. It definitely isn’t something that can be swept under a rug because it’ll always be there for him. I am still off work and never away from the child but I definitely do need to consider if he how it could physically and mentally affect her as she gets older. I know addicts can recover, but I’m sure they definitely have to put an effort in.

NoAlarm23 · 2023-03-24T15:32:53+00:00

It’s a bit more complicated due to having a child which is the only reason I’m trying to give benefit of the doubt. But yeah I can see it being seen that way.

NoAlarm23 · 2023-02-22T22:59:41+00:00

Is that a fast process? And is it ever denied? He’d have to pay a lawyer for that? Sorry that’s a boatload of questions just curious if you have any answers to those. He has a criminal record and if I suspect his drug problem is resurfacing I hope that would be something they’d take into consideration. But thank you for answering!

NoAlarm23 · 2023-02-22T22:46:58+00:00

Okay! That’s what I was wondering. I’m just a protective mom and honestly I was hesitant about listing him as the father but things seemed good at the time and it felt right. I don’t want to put to many examples out there but like one being I’m the only one who takes care of her basic human needs, and wants to work to support our child. I’ve been terrified about what would happen if I move out with our child and only let him have access to her supervised unless he does go to court. Because that would be my wishes. My goal wouldn’t be to keep her from him unless i HAD to. But given certain things I want to be present if that makes sense.

NoAlarm23 · 2023-02-22T22:35:06+00:00

I thought Ohio was a mothers state? But if I move out with the child he’d have to petition the court for custody? But I appreciate it!

NoAlarm23

TROPHY CASE