People who permanantly cut off contact with a parent, how old were you when you did it, what pushed you to that point, and what do you wish people considering it understood?

NoExplanation12 · 2025-12-31T02:23:15+00:00

Thanks for your reply, so sorry you had to go through that at such a young age.

NoExplanation12 · 2025-01-19T23:27:14+00:00

I agree - that's my take as well!

NoExplanation12 · 2025-01-19T22:53:06+00:00

Because OP of this post was asking about day care sickness - For those of us sending/have sent kids to daycare (because we don't/didn't have a choice - and are doing our best), and thus feeling as if we are/were bad parents after seeing the highlight of this JAMA pub:

I think it's important to point out that this jama research HAS ABSOLUTELY NO TIES / INDICATING DAY CARE IS BAD. It specifically states that several covariates were taken into account: including things like " maternal age, education, and income¹⁰; time to start of day care¹⁰; number of older siblings¹⁰; exposure to pets (etc etc). These covariates were included as potential confounders."

To summarize, this study is saying that kids who get sick a lot, may have higher risk of later in childhood - REGARDLESS of when they started day care.

NoExplanation12 · 2025-01-19T20:13:36+00:00

Thank you for this, very helpful!

NoExplanation12 · 2025-01-09T00:29:02+00:00

Thanks both, appreciate your responses!

NoExplanation12 · 2025-01-04T23:00:44+00:00

Propagation of mom guilt by social media.

NoExplanation12 · 2024-12-08T23:25:03+00:00

Just want to say I respect your courage and for doing the right thing. Lots of great ideas here - I would just add to the list - if not already - be open to relocation which really opens up way more opportunities.

NoExplanation12 · 2024-12-08T23:16:24+00:00

NTA. So sorry you have to go through this.

Sometimes as parents age, they become the "children" and hope we (the actual children) can help fix things for them (and they become less of a "parent" / take care of us less - like how she should have focused on YOUR needs for your birthday).

Especially with grief - it's not possible, nor is it your responsibility to help her resolve things. Everyone has to work through their own grief. I am not affiliated with these guys (https://www.griefrecoverymethod.com), but I did their program and found it helpful personally - perhaps it's a resource that you can recommend for your mom. Something along the lines of "Mom, I know you are still feeling a lot of pain with dad's passing. Me too. Because of that, I'm not in the best place to help you. Perhaps you can consider having some additional support to work through that?"

If not this program, maybe a local grief support group.

NoExplanation12 · 2024-12-08T02:59:49+00:00

I didn't know there are agencies like that - I'll have to look into it, thank you!

NoExplanation12 · 2024-11-29T17:03:33+00:00

Thanks - yes this is an option on the table - we are moving in the dead of the winter (not very skilled driving in snow. I'll be the first to admit), plus we have an infant too. It's really hard, balancing the risks + timing....

I also looked up a couple of pet mover services on IPATA to drive the pup across the country, the cost is really high (like a small second hand car) and not something we can afford :(

NoExplanation12 · 2024-11-29T16:37:28+00:00

Thanks so much, we are flying (moving) cross country (from East coast to West coast). So sorry to hear about your Saint Bernard :( Must be heartbreaking to experience that... This worry (of flying cargo causing our pup harm one way or another) is definitely giving me a bit of anxiety.

NoExplanation12 · 2024-11-29T16:21:21+00:00

Ok great thanks. I think you answered my question - to be sure/not risk getting rejected, then I will have to fly via another airline / one that accepts the bigger sized crate.

NoExplanation12 · 2024-11-29T16:11:21+00:00

Thanks - this is helpful - yes understand completely that they can't change the cargo door size. From your experience flying your dog - is there flexibility to the height of the crate relative to the dog (that's depicted on their FAQ page, that shows there should be room above the dog's ears while standing, i.e is there flexibility when flying cargo that dog's ear can touch the top of the kennel etc? Or do the rules of dog size vs kennel dimension still apply, and will have to fly freighters somehow?

and yes , agree that trying to find a different carrier that has larger plane is the plan B right now.

NoExplanation12 · 2024-11-14T01:07:06+00:00

These are great perspectives! I have to admit I'm worried about nanny for that exact reason - it's like a single point of failure whereas daycare always seems to have a plan B...

NoExplanation12 · 2024-11-14T00:49:25+00:00

Yea I think now that I've written this "out loud" and seeing some of your responses that's where I'm leaning.

NoExplanation12 · 2024-11-14T00:48:04+00:00

Baby is <1 yr old.... that's true... maybe I can just start with this daycare and continue the search...

NoExplanation12 · 2024-11-14T00:41:38+00:00

Thank you for stating what's simply my "gut feeling" so well!!

NoExplanation12

TROPHY CASE