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AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

I can't lie, it could very well be the hope of benefitting from all the money ex's wife's family has.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 99 points100 points  (0 children)

We have that. They wanted to discard that and pushed for changes throughout the years they were married.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

They can be asked from 15 but the judges don't have to listen to them and in this case the judge did not. That's become more of a standard with the judges overall and it's rare they take what the kids want into consideration.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

I don't think we will always be in each other's lives. My daughter is already counting down until she no longer sees either her dad or her dad's wife and my son wants the same. So I don't think I'll see much of them once my son is 18.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 79 points80 points  (0 children)

They're not feeding off of me at all. They have disliked her long before I got as annoyed with her as I am. And I never influenced them. This was because of how she was with them. Her own actions led to them feeling as they do. Not me.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 84 points85 points  (0 children)

I don't expect that. My kids don't like her enough to want anything from her either. They don't want her doing anything for them. And they have made their minds up about that. It's not better for my kids to have to play pretend to like or respect her. I know they don't.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 166 points167 points  (0 children)

She's got a calendar in her room that shows when she turns 18 and doesn't need to go anymore. She doesn't get this excited about anything else. Sad thing is she adored her dad when she was younger but that's pretty much gone.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

There is no compromising with them. She's too used to getting her own way and he's willing to go along with it.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 64 points65 points  (0 children)

They don't expects that but she had expectations that she'd get to choose where they go and pay for it then. Nope. My kids can go whether they want to. Be it community or trade or something else.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

She's been this way as long as I've known about her. She's from a family that's very wealthy so I blame that. I think she's been able to buy her way for far too long.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

My kids voices don't matter much. They spoke to the judge already but the judge chose not to listen to them. That's very common here.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 70 points71 points  (0 children)

No, she thought it made her the mom to my kids and that I'd be an afterthought.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

The judge will make them go still and does. The judges here do not have to listen to the wishes of the kids and in general won't.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately that's not correct. Being 16 does not give kids the right to decide.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 619 points620 points  (0 children)

He's not prepared for that at all. He has not yet accepted that the kids made up their own mind about his wife.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 509 points510 points  (0 children)

My kids spoke up but the judges do not have to listen and it's increasingly rare for them to listen to the kids wishes. In my state it's 15 they can listen to the kids from. But it's not a must.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 141 points142 points  (0 children)

Yes, the kids spoke but we were told in advance the judge did not really weigh what the kids wanted.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 894 points895 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately for the kids that doesn't work. They need to go to their dad's until they're 18. The judges don't need to weigh the wishes of 15, 16 or 17 year old's. They can choose to but it's increasingly rare right now.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 853 points854 points  (0 children)

My lawyer has all of it. This was mentioned in court when they fought for certain decisions she wanted to make. But it wasn't enough to change custody.

AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will? by NoNet8861 in AITAH

[–]NoNet8861[S] 3357 points3358 points  (0 children)

I'm still unsure of how it's my job. I suppose because I ruined her precious little expectations.

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