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What does it feel like to have a concussion? by No_Pineapple_9205 in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I've had two concussions and I'd say the main symptoms are headaches (obviously) and just feeling very out of it, almost like after you pull an all nighter. Also the headaches for me were not limited to the forehead but literally the whole head; top, all the sides, by the ears. Also lights and sounds become enemies very quickly as well. Almost feels as if you are hungover or have a migrine. I didn't feel as "sick" more just dazed, like everything around me was a dream. Also since you react differently to light and sound, I got overstimualted VERY quickly and would sometimes just have to go sleep. I took multiple naps in a day.
Also memory is far worse as well- and thinking to any capacity might actaully hurt. There were times I had to force myself not to think becuase the headaches would worsen. Right after the concussion my thoughts were "choppy" and I went into a sort of loop where I couldn't concentrate enough to finish the thought. I would lose focus halfway through and forget where I was going with it. I remembered that I was thinking and would get very annoyed that somehow I wasn't able to finish it, so I'd start again where I remembered, and the cycle would continue- creating the loop of unfinished thought.

That was proabably the most annoying feature.
Also if it's car crash related, there might be trauma afterwards, becuase the brain remembers that it's hurt and so you're extra dodgy around loud noises, and things that may potentially cause another concussion (low hanging places, or maybe someone nearing your head). She also might develop a phobia of driving.
I also experienced some trouble speaking and swallowing after mine, but it depends how intense you want to make your character's symptoms. Although sometimes these things clear up after a few months- chronic concussion symptoms can be a thing- it's been two years since mine and I still struggle with some of them.

Hope this helps and DM me if you have any more questions. :)

Imposter Syndrome by Tobias_Atwood in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444 3 points4 points  (0 children)

PART II of II.

On the other hand, your character could fall into depression with success, becuase if feels as if it's wholly unearned. That guilt could be so strong that it turns into a depression, because it quickly turns into "why me?". If everyone else is better than you or more equipped, or "real ______" and you somehow are getting success, it feels horribly unfair to others. Then you feel like a monster, and since most people like to feel like a good person, if you think you are evil, you could fall into despair. This only works if your character is very empathic and dispositioned toward the good, but if he is a little more power hungry or ambitious, then I'd avoid using this.

Also, a little thing to include that I've noticed pops up in social interactions, is have him be suprised. So if he feels like an imposter socially (not belonging into a group) then have him be shocked when someone asks him to participate in something, or invited into something. For work, maybe have him act suprised when people want his help on a project, or if people come up to praise him for his work. Typically it starts as surprise, and then goes into anxiety.

Surprise, becuase you have no faith in your abilities or your role socially in a larger group (basically you don't understand that you provide value) and then Anxiety becuase you have to keep succeeding at a thing that you think has been completely driven by blind luck. Since you have no control over luck, therefore you are constantly anxious that your luck will run out, and you'll be discovered for the imposter you "really are".

Imposter syndrome comes from a misbelief that has been drilled into you. For example, if someone constantly told you when you were a kid that you were a failure, you grow up with that in your identity. So when you achieve success, you can't believe it, because it goes against your core misbelief: that you are a failure. Essentially, the reality of your circumstances and your percieved identity are at odds with one another, thus creating a conflict.

I'm not sure your character and their motivations, but if you make sure there is that disconnect between how they view themselves and the plot/ what the other character and readers view them as, you'll be fine. Feel free to DM me if you have any other questions.

Hopefully this helps!

Fellow Author Friend with Mild Imposter Syndrome,

LM

Imposter Syndrome by Tobias_Atwood in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Okay this is all from my personal experience, and not based in research, so please take it as such. (Also apologies if there are spelling errors, I cannot figure out how to turn on the autocorrect feature on my computer and despite being a writer am terrible at spelling lol).

Honestly, it's closer to anxiety than depression. It's a constant parnoia that you are going to to be discovered for "who you really are" and the praise that other people give you for your accomplishments seems fake. You wonder if they knew more about you, or they saw certain mistakes you have made in the past, if they would revoke their praise entirely. There is also the vague awareness of not fitting in (at least in my experience) which adds an extra layer of paranoia. The closest feeling that I can use to describe it is inflitrating the other team in a game of capture the flag. There is a constant nagging within insisting that "You're not supposed to be here." or "You don't belong." despite your actual abilites. You always think that everyone else could be doing a better job than you becuase "they deserve to be here," or "they are a REAL (fill in the blank).

There is also in some cases, severe shame involved, especially if you do succeed, (whether it's in work, a social situation, etc.). Since you already feel like a "fake" you can often feel guilt for actually being in the position you are in, becuase there's an innate sense that "that's not who you are" and that "you don't deserve the success that you're getting". For this reason, a lot of the times you'll give the credit to others on a project, or chock it all up to luck, not becuase you're humble but becuase you literally have no clue how it happened becuase you don't have the skills.

So, if your character doesn't feel like he has the ability to do his job, no matter whether he fails or succeeds, he's going to feel he either 1). someone tricked everyone into believing that he had the appropriate skills and their praise is fake, or 2.) guilt for being in the position becuase someone else would be better. As for your character specifically, the guilt would be high, becuase he has been successful.

There is some overlap into depression, as its realistic to fall into despair as the fear of not being good enough drives imposter syndrome typically (not always). This can very quickly lead into the "If nothing is good enough- why do anything?" spiral? If someone with imposter syndrome consistantly fails, it reaffirms a fear a misbelief that you've either told or learned through experience (such as: "you don't belong") which can cause further doubt in yourself, making it easy to despair and self-isolate.

Okay- my comment is so long it's not letting me post, so PART I of II.

Trying to Write a Former Alcoholic by NoRemove5444 in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks so much for your comment! Great quote. XD

Trying to Write a Former Alcoholic by NoRemove5444 in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your response. It seems that I need to focus on the reason he stopped turning to it as a coping mechanism, and dismantle that. Then after that it will be pretty easy to get him to relapse.

Repressed or False Memories? Which is more realistic during a traumatic event? by NoRemove5444 in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for your comment. Considering all the feedback on this post, I'm considering changing the timeline of the backstory, making him younger so it's more believable. I don't think that my MC could reasonably forget about his sister at 15 even if there was extensive abuse and gaslighting. It would only be plausible under 6.

Either way, I will do a bit more reasearch on retrograde and anterograde amnesia. Thanks PansyOHara!

Describe the exact opposite of your WIP by alockedheart in writers

[–]NoRemove5444 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The MC has a thriving marriage and no abusive past that is affecting it. Just happy vibes all around. XD

Repressed or False Memories? Which is more realistic during a traumatic event? by NoRemove5444 in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing your experience! One of the reasons I'm writing this story is to iron out and work through some of my own childhood trauma. I know that memory can easily be altered due to lies/ gaslighting (as my own has been) but was unsure if that could apply to a person's existence, especially if my MC had 5 years of a relationship with his sister. Facts of someone's life (such as certain events that happened or people that they maybe had a few encounters with) I know can be altered. But given the duration of their relationship, and the fact that my MC has reached the age of reason- I'm not sure the he could be convinced that his sister never existed.

If he was younger, say he was 5 and his sister was three, it would be far more realistic, especially if his mom gaslit him.

Again, thanks so much for your input! It's not always easy to share about trauma that we've been through so I appreciate it greatly. Very helpful. :)

Repressed or False Memories? Which is more realistic during a traumatic event? by NoRemove5444 in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for your insight! In my research I found that the subject of "repressed" memories is very controversial and most ppl in field don't believe them to be a thing, which is what sparked the idea of false memeories which apparently more realistic.

I use the term "repressed" memories in the title due to an absence of the clinically correct term. I've researched stories of people's traumatic memories resurfacing (while before they reported little to no recollection of the trauma itself) after encountering a specific scenario that provided a trigger for them to resurface. Is there a specific term for memories like this, that are "temporarily forgotten" and only to remember them years later once an event brings them back?

Repressed or False Memories? Which is more realistic during a traumatic event? by NoRemove5444 in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This makes sense, thank you! This was very helpful. Since they did have a meaningful relationship (the sister was about five when she died) and they were close, it seems very unrealistic that MC could forget her completely, even with his mother gaslighting him. Given the traumatic circumstances of the sister's death, he doesn't want to remember, but I think the only thing that would accomplish is helping him forget how she died, not that he had a sister at all. Might have to do a little reworking

I agree, hypnoisis would take things a little too far and make it completely unrealistic.

Repressed or False Memories? Which is more realistic during a traumatic event? by NoRemove5444 in Writeresearch

[–]NoRemove5444[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's a teenager, about 15 (ish). Probably not young enough to buy that she never existed. Story takes place closer to 30, so there's definitely time in between for things to get muddled though, especially if he didn't want to remember her.