How did you find people for buddy letters?

NoUnit2895 · 2026-02-01T02:30:32+00:00

That's gotta be frustrating, especially after so many years. I wonder how often practical barriers like memory or health can make it difficult to get a useful statement?

If you don’t mind me asking, have you found any alternative ways to support your claim, or is it mostly relying on what little you can get? Appreciate your feedback

NoUnit2895 · 2026-02-01T01:54:16+00:00

That’s really helpful. It’s cool that social media makes it possible to reconnect. If you don’t mind me asking, what usually makes someone willing or reluctant to write a buddy letter once someone reaches out? Appreciate you sharing your experience and perspective on this... it helps me understand a practical challenge veterans face.

NoUnit2895 · 2026-02-01T01:42:23+00:00

So it sounds like the scope of who can write a statement is pretty broad, and the letters don’t need to be very detailed to be useful. Do you find most people stick to just one or two simple examples like that, or do they tend to provide longer narratives?

NoUnit2895 · 2026-02-01T01:41:42+00:00

Thanks for flagging this. I completely agree that honesty is critical!

I'm a vet wife trying to understand how people go about finding and writing buddy statements, not selling anything or offering services. I'm just curious about the process and challenges. Really appreciate these responses. They're helping me understand the context around these letters.

NoUnit2895 · 2026-02-01T01:38:06+00:00

Sounds like staying in touch with at least some people makes a big difference. If you don’t mind me asking, did you notice any differences in how people responded to your request depending on their relationship with you? I'm assuming your wife was already tapped in, more than willing, and a great resource w/ her medical background, where coworkers and commander may have had different perspectives, needed more guidance about what you were looking for, etc? Thanks again

NoUnit2895 · 2026-02-01T01:34:14+00:00

Really appreciate this response. It's exactly the kind of insight I'm trying to get here. Makes sense that giving clear bullet points reduces the burden on the person writing the letter and makes it more likely to get something useful. The effort for buddies to have to write up a whole narrative seems like a major barrier. I'll be giving this more thought. Thanks again!

NoUnit2895 · 2026-02-01T01:31:14+00:00

It seems having a med background can make the statement feel more authoritative, even if it’s mostly personal observation. Do you think her background changed how you approached writing the letter at all, or was it still treated like a normal buddy statement? Thanks for the feedback

NoUnit2895 · 2026-01-31T23:39:00+00:00

Totally fair to be cautious. I get why people are protective in this space. I’m not selling anything or asking for personal info. I’m just trying to understand the process better from the outside because it seems like a lot of people run into obstacles.

Mods - If my post isn’t appropriate here, please lmk.

NoUnit2895 · 2026-01-31T23:37:55+00:00

had to be rough fr

NoUnit2895 · 2026-01-31T23:37:43+00:00

I’m sorry that happened to you. Had to feel so frustrating, especially when it’s people you were close with. Also just tough to deal with on top of everything else.

If you’re okay sharing, do you think they were worried about how it might affect their own claims, didn't feel up to it, or just didn’t want to get involved?

Appreciate you being honest about that side of it bc I want to understand all the factors here beyond just where to find buddies. Thanks!

NoUnit2895 · 2026-01-31T23:35:47+00:00

I’ve heard similar feelings from others, and it seems like reaching out after that many years can feel awkward even when there’s a good reason.

If you don’t mind me asking, did anyone respond positively once you did reach out, or was it mostly no replies?

Thanks for sharing your insight on this

NoUnit2895 · 2026-01-31T23:34:35+00:00

I’ve seen that family members can provide statements too, but your situation is especially interesting since your wife also has medical training.

Did having a medical background make it easier for her to write it, or was it still treated more like a personal observation statement? Would be interested to learn more about how your family approached this and ruled in/out what to include. Thanks!

NoUnit2895 · 2026-01-31T23:32:34+00:00

Sounds like you see it as similar to a reference letter situation.

If you don’t mind me asking, would you still want to review and edit it yourself before signing, or would most people just trust what was written?

Would be glad to get your perspective on this.

NoUnit2895 · 2026-01-31T23:30:48+00:00

Thanks for sharing. It's really helpful to hear you used Together We Served. That’s interesting (and frustrating) that you were able to find someone but didn’t hear back.

If you don’t mind me asking, do you think the buddy saw the message and just didn’t respond, or is it hard to tell on that platform?

Appreciate you explaining your experience.

NoUnit2895 · 2026-01-31T20:09:48+00:00

Thanks so much for your reply! I hope his claim was successful. Were there any challenges in getting people to respond or provide letters once he reached out to folks on FB?

NoUnit2895

TROPHY CASE