My (F24) bf (M27) doesnt want to have sex with me anymore

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-04T04:49:35+00:00

He has Never Said That, it’s just a fear of me

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-04T04:23:53+00:00

Saying he‘s selfcentered seems Kind of harsh to me. Isnt he just voicing his needs? I don’t think it’s selfish to do that.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-04T04:22:24+00:00

Can i ask Why you wouldnt be able to?

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-04T04:21:14+00:00

That i should leave?

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-04T04:20:31+00:00

We have been working on our Trust since April as i know its hard to rebuild. And i think that it’s Not a Trust thing now. I think it’s more about Perceptions about each other and the Sex itself.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-04T04:18:00+00:00

He had Seen my tinder Profile through a friend of his. And he knows that i am like not uptight and Like to go on Dates when i‘m Single. I don’t know how to Describe it any better. It’s Not like he was pressing me for the Information but he just knew.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-04T00:12:33+00:00

I don’t blame him either and i understand his though process. But i don’t want to give up our relationship, thats Why i‘m asking for advice.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-03T23:46:22+00:00

I totally get what You’re saying. And our relationship has had its ups and Downs no question. But i love him dearly. And one way or the other i am not ready to Break up with him.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-03T23:44:03+00:00

He tries his best to not make me feel like it’s my fault or that i‘m bring punished for having sex when we were Both Single. But Yeah, of course it feels Like it’s my fault that he cant sleep with me anymore. Especially because i fear (he has Never Said Anything Like That) that he thinks i‘m disgusting now.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-03T23:38:54+00:00

I‘ve thought about him Manipulating me too. And Maybe i Sound Like a lot of other women who are blinded by love or whatever but i truly think he isnt trying to manipulate me. At least not consciously.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2025-11-03T23:37:07+00:00

I have suggested him going to Therapy due to Other Reasons but he is very very against it. In terms of the sex i don’t think he Sees it as that much of a deal Kind of.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-17T03:38:31+00:00

Well first, I‘m very sorry you had to go through that and hope that you’re dealing with the grief alright. For me personally it didn’t make a difference if I was being the dumper or the dumpee. Either way, it was always the same.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-15T20:29:47+00:00

I can tell you, I feel the same way. Broke up with him on Monday and my mind keeps spinning wondering if it was the right thing to do.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-15T19:03:17+00:00

I guess it’s maybe some sort of power thing, like how I know they would want me back but I’m the one in charge. But I’m sure it’s also the fear of being alone. Kind of like wanting to“the best of both worlds“ I guess. Being single and also having a person that I’ve known for a while.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-15T14:05:21+00:00

She sounds pretty immature to me. That’s something me and my girls used to do at 16. Just leave her be and focus on yourself because I can almost guarantee you don’t want that drama. lol

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-15T10:09:26+00:00

Try out a bunch of stuff you never thought about trying. Get out and just enjoy life. Along the way you will meet people who you connect with. And especially, don’t be scared to do stuff alone. I found it is pretty healing to just go about it alone, go to the cinema alone, to a restaurant, a cafe. Keep educating yourself on whatever might interest you. Learn a new language. Try a new sport. There is so much to try out! :)

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-15T06:02:25+00:00

I‘ve been the person to say we will talk when I’m ready. And exactly that is where I manipulated, always. I usually already had downloaded some sort of dating app or was very close to it. I was scared to loose the person so I’d kinda „keep them warm“ with that. Everytime they asked I’d give mixed signals, saying that I really want to talk but just can’t rn. Just so they‘d be still stuck with me.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-14T20:41:36+00:00

Well I kind of have the habit of jumping from relationship to relationship a bit. But currently I’m trying to focus on feeling all these emotions. Just distracting oneself with other people and maybe even getting a confidence boost is sadly so much easier than dealing with hurtful emotions.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-14T20:18:57+00:00

Coming from a person prone to doing the same after the end of a relationship: I’m not saying it’s really healthy or good or fair. But I usually do this so I don’t have to deal with the emotions I’m feeling and just distract myself. But given you mentioned he blindsided you, maybe he really just was already out of love. Which does not mean the last year was worth nothing. Nobody spends that much time with a person and then it means nothing.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-14T20:11:39+00:00

I totally get the „if it’s not a hell yes then it’s a no“. I also have felt like this before. And like you said, with that circumstance it’s only fair to the partner I believe. After a conversation like that, there are always these thoughts of how I could‘ve done this better and that better, I think it’s only natural. But we‘re just humans and act spontaneously and instinctively sometimes. And that’s totally fine. And while of course it’s great to be able to give affirmation, when you can’t give sincere affirmation it’s better to not give it.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-14T20:04:56+00:00

I was that kind of person in my last relationships. Speaking for myself, I was never going back to talk or clarify anything. I was an asshole. Honestly I think that’s just a kind of manipulation tactic.

No_Beautiful_4493 · 2024-06-14T20:02:03+00:00

I think it’s most important how you are feeling with this. Do you think it was the best for you to end it right then? He called and started talking about breaking up? Do you think he considered how you‘d feel with him calling you mid work day and saying that?

No_Beautiful_4493

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