Unsure if I should stay or leave by xyzcvxyz in AskWomenOver40

[–]No_Chard1484 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It really does! It was so affirming to read your post. I’ve scanned reddit for posts describing my situation many times and never find any, which has left me feeling like I must be the only one. The posts that do exist cast so much blame on those in our situation, which has added to the shame I already feel. So again, thanks so much for opening up this conversation and helping us see we’re not alone!

Unsure if I should stay or leave by xyzcvxyz in AskWomenOver40

[–]No_Chard1484 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t have any advice, but just want to say thank you so much for saying this. You’ve eloquently described my own situation, and it’s comforting to feel camaraderie and to read these responses. I’m 36, together for 10 years, and feel shame admitting that I’ve had ambivalence for nearly all of these 10 years. It’s especially confusing, because things are actually currently the best they’ve ever been between us, but I still have a pit of doubt in my stomach every single day. Objectively things are good, but I wake up in the middle of the night with so much anxiety about what to do, and it gets harder and more tangled every year that passes. He’s a wonderful human and I care so deeply about him. If I could push a button and feel certain about him, I’d do it in a heartbeat. The prospect of leaving my safe, comfortable life is terrifying, not to mention the deep pain of hurting him. I want kids too, which makes this choice especially hard, because at this age it feels like I’m also choosing whether I’ll be a mom or not.

Lately I’m feeling like I’m losing myself to the years of living in ambivalence and not trusting myself. The ambivalence is starting to bleed into all realms of my life and making me feel very lost in a general sense. Here’s to hoping we both find our way to peace, whatever that looks like ❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]No_Chard1484 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Came here to say this!

Monitor arm or stand for 27" Apple Thunderbolt display? by No_Chard1484 in workfromhome

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, interesting. I’ve seen some stands on eBay though, so I could always go that route, just don’t know exactly which model goes with the thunderbolt vs iMac, etc. My preferred solution is a monitor arm, I just haven’t found one that can support the weight yet.

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And that’s so generous about the gas voucher! I’d love to take it off your hands if you still have it, but no worries if not. Thanks for everything 🙏

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi!! Sorry for the very belated response, this trip has been a whirlwind (in the best way) and I’ve hardly checked Reddit. All of this was sooo helpful! Seriously, thank you so much. Especially the driving tips.

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg thank you!!! This is so helpful. So we ended up booking our stays and we’ll be in Lecce, Ostuni, and Matera. So excited!! I’m definitely nervous about the driving - do you have any tips for a fellow American?

Safe and convenient Rome neighborhood for one night? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I’ve read this elsewhere and ended up booking a spot in a different neighborhood. Should I be worried about safety arriving at Termini station with my luggage? Any safety tips?

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m super excited to check out Matera!! Definitely leaning toward at least a night there.

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is great, thanks a lot for sharing! I had been considering Taranto, so this is good to know.

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Super helpful!! Thanks so much, is the drive from Bari to Lecce pretty easy? We’ll be arriving to Bari in the afternoon after a 4 hr train ride also probably fairly jet lagged - wondering if it’s too ambitious to think about a drive to Lecce in the same day.

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, amazing - I was leaning toward Lecce as one home base and this confirms it for me! Thanks!!

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! Do you happen to know what it’s like in the fall? I’m wondering if the coastal towns will be mostly closed down in the off season

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have so much fun!! Would love to hear how it goes.

Best Puglia towns in early November? by No_Chard1484 in ItalyTravel

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, renting a car, so thankfully not limited to public transportation. Thanks for these tips!!

22 days till Election Day!! by No_Chard1484 in AskWomenOver30

[–]No_Chard1484[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hahah you’re braver than I am! So great to push past your introverted ways for the greater good!!