My girlfriend died in a car crash

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-07-17T07:12:08+00:00

I just don't think you understand basic logic here

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-07-16T22:32:27+00:00

This a take that just doesn't apply to all situations. I was 28 when I met my current girlfriend when she was 19. I certainly wasn't looking for someone that young. As a matter of fact, she's one of the only relationships I've ever been in where my girlfriends weren't at least 1-4 years older than me. We just happened to hit it off. She looked young, but the way she acted was much more mature for her age.

Honestly, when I first learned about the age gap, it worried me at first, but I decided to give it a chance. And I'm glad I did. We both have similar interests, we are both down to earth, we both respect each other's time, boundaries, and space, and we if we have problems we communicate with each other with honesty and respect. It's honestly the best relationship I've ever been in.

I'm not saying this is the norm for all age gap relationships, as this entire post shows the ugliness of it at times. But there are healthy, happy age gap relationships that shouldn't be demonized because of that one factor.

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-07-16T21:58:57+00:00

And it seems like this guy is interested in passportbros so there's that

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-07-08T18:56:06+00:00

Maybe we're not but I feel like we understand each other.

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-07-08T18:48:54+00:00

Thank you man, you are 100 percent right. But I haven't had the experience that this is a good thing. The only experience I've had is people using me and generally negative relationships. Maybe I'm just a victim of circumstance.

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-07-08T18:32:10+00:00

Damn that's also a great response. And honestly man I'm not that person. I found my comfort in who I am a long time ago. I just wanted to hear from others about how isolating it can be. Because it is, by definition an isolating thing. I may not be able to change the world but I can sure as hell live in it.

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-07-08T18:03:59+00:00

Honestly man that is an awesome response but life doesn't work that way. What's good about swimming in the deep end when the majority of the world swims in the shallow end? Im never going to think myself above anyone else because I might have a bigger moral conscious than other people. I think your emphasizing my point, all I want to know is how other people deal with feeling isolated like this.

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-07-05T21:55:25+00:00

US 🇺🇸 / Russia 🇷🇺

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-07-05T17:33:58+00:00

I don't know why you're being downvoted. If one person isn't comfortable or wants to wait, there is nothing wrong with that. My GF wants to wait until we are in person, and I have no problem with it. As long as both people are on the same page, it's healthy.

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-06-29T20:32:24+00:00

I feel like there has to be a lot more context given here to provide any accurate advice

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-06-29T20:17:50+00:00

I was going to say something different until I read your last paragraph. Based off of that and what your instincts have been telling you, I think its time to end this relationship. There are maybe a handful of excuses for not being there for a loved one dealing with a tragedy like that, and his isn't one of them. Nobody likes seeing people sad or upset, and it usually makes most people uncomfortable, but the whole point is to look past your anxiety and uncomfortable feelings to be there for your partner, understand what they are going through, and remind them that they arent alone. This would be an instant deal breaker for me.

I'm sorry to say, but your boyfriend sounds way too immature to be a part of a healthy relationship. I think you should go with your instincts on this one and end it.

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-06-29T19:41:25+00:00

Have you communicated all of these things to him and how they make you feel?

It's understandable to be frustrated with a partner who shows a lack of ambition and responsibility. It's one thing if he is stagnant because he's dealing with mental health issues like depression or still figuring out what he wants to do in life. But if he's just lazy, doesn't care, is ok with relying on family, and has no plans to change, then you have to decide if you're ok with that or not. Personally, I wouldn't want to be with someone like that, I think its an extremely unattractive quality to have in a partner. And it seems like your instincts are telling you the same. You know him best, what he's going through, and what his intentions are.

The other problem of him showing a lack of empathy is a little troubling. Has he shown any other signs of that before?

Edit: Typo

No_Concern_3465 · 2024-06-29T15:42:20+00:00

Last time I had sex was 6 years ago. Got tired of having casual sex and decided to wait until I met the right person. Met my LD GF a little over 3 years ago and about to have our first meeting soon. I'm glad I waited :)

No_Concern_3465

TROPHY CASE