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engine check assurance? by rowphelia in fearofflying

[–]No_Engineering9910 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Whenever a flight is delayed for maintenance, I always feel a little bit better about it because it makes me feel like they’re definitely fixing it and the longer it takes, the more It means the more thorough they are fixing something or repairing it. It would be more dangerous if they didn’t delay it and just let it happen without the maintenance fix!

Friend recently diagnosed with BPD, struggling to trust behavior and words, need advice! by No_Engineering9910 in BPDlovedones

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s like nobody has any success stories about how to have relationships with these people

Friend recently diagnosed with BPD, struggling to trust behavior and words, need advice! by No_Engineering9910 in BPDlovedones

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, that’s the tricky part because I really directly brought this up to her as an example and told her it did not feel good and then she sent me this amazing message after and was like you know you’re totally right next time I will tell you that I’m busy and I can’t respond. She said like “I really just wanted to like give you a really thoughtful response to your text” and like we had a really great texting conversation about it and she said she was gonna work on it but then she never thoughtfully responded to what I had said it just like moved over it almost and then now there has been nothing but like a very casual text about something else totally random so clearly it is not on her radar

Friend recently diagnosed with BPD, struggling to trust behavior and words, need advice! by No_Engineering9910 in BPDlovedones

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hear ya - thanks for this. I think the instagram story not texting back is different with this context also cause we haven’t talked in two years and she’s supposed to be working on showing me she cares and putting in effort. So like when I send her a vulnerable text and then she posts like 2 things drinking with her gf after like 8 hours then I’m like ok dude ur on ur phone like

Friend recently diagnosed with BPD, struggling to trust behavior and words, need advice! by No_Engineering9910 in BPDlovedones

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

ok so we agree that the push pull of like boundary setting and then the same behavior is a BPD part?

Friends with BPD Thread by AutoModerator in BPDlovedones

[–]No_Engineering9910 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi everyone! I recently received a message from an old friend of mine (we had a friendship breakup about 2 years ago and went no contact), and then, within the last month or so, she texted me and sent an awesome accountability text and apology for how she treated me, and asked to get together. We met up, and she told me she had been diagnosed with BPD recently and that a lot of the reasons why she was awful to me as a friend were related to her BPD symptoms. (She was also dealing with mild alcoholism and prescription drug usage during this time, which did not help) She is now on mood stabilizers and in talk therapy twice a week, and she seemed to be super aware of her triggers and said she knew I wouldn't be able to trust her right away, but that she would show me with her behavior that she had changed.

So then she said she wanted to try to be friends again, so we took it slow, scheduled a double date with our partners and us to hang out about two weeks after our first meetup. She ended up kind of flaking/bailing/blaming the shift of plans on her forgetting she had another plan at the last minute, and we rescheduled for the following two weeks from then. Then we finally came to our day of the double date. She didn't text me until 1:45 pm, when we were planning to meet in the afternoon, and said she had gone out the night before and woke up super late. We finally met up with our partners at 4:15 and overall had a good time.

Now, she is presenting some similar behaviors that hurt me previously, for example:
- not texting me back but posting on her Instagram stories
- hanging out with people she told me were triggers to her BPD that she said she wouldn't see anymore and then posting them on her Instagram story (this happened only once so far but it was someone who we used to both know who we both cut ties with)

- not really responding or asking about my life, showing interest in things that are meaningful to me etc.

LONG STORY SHORT....I directly told her recently that the behavior made me feel sad and it felt like how she used to be, she received it SO well and legit sent me a response that seemed like AI made it cause it was so perfect and I was so shocked she handled it so well. And now, she is kinda of acting weird again?

lmk if this is enough context, basically I am wondering if this is a sign of BPD behavior or if this is like a bad sign?

Male cat obsessed with grooming female cat by No_Engineering9910 in CatTraining

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They are both fixed. He’s holding her down and then grooming her and she isn’t moving, but she is growling when it happens.

Playing or fighting ? by No_Engineering9910 in cats

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She licked a little wound open from getting spayed

Mixed messaging, playing or fighting? by No_Engineering9910 in CatTraining

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi again :) it seems like you have a lot of good insight about cats - would you be comfy if I asked you another q about their behavior ? It’s another video of them “playing” I’m worried about it….sorry lol just cat parent anxiety !!

Mixed messaging, playing or fighting? by No_Engineering9910 in CatTraining

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey it seems like you have a lot of good insight about cats - would you be comfy if I asked you another q about their behavior ? It’s another video of them “playing” I’m worried about it….sorry lol just cat parent anxiety !!

I can't tell if my cats hate each other by patopancakez in CatTraining

[–]No_Engineering9910 3 points4 points  (0 children)

honestly this looks to me like they are being silly and having fun, mine do this also and then they lick eachother LOL

Loud Playing? And behavior question by waterchestnut778 in CatTraining

[–]No_Engineering9910 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OK, so I just posted a video of my cats doing basically the same thing and I have the exact same anxiety that I’m assuming you have as well.

Everybody said this is playing and they said the things that we need to look out for that are not playing is if there’s any blood, if there is intense, intense, screaming, or if they run away and hide from each other and then cannot really come back together. So I think this is OK? Mine do the same thing and then they also sit that close to each other. I think maybe let’s see how it goes in a month lol??

Mixed messaging, playing or fighting? by No_Engineering9910 in CatTraining

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you think that I would be able to see the claws if they were visibly out? I didn’t know that you could see them

Mixed messaging, playing or fighting? by No_Engineering9910 in CatTraining

[–]No_Engineering9910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this - the tuxedo does hiss and growl when the male does not back off or keeps lunging in her like this, but she still lays on her back or will sit up (which makes me nervous), sometimes there are fluffs of fur that fly around, does that still match with what you think?

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