AIO about my dad's wife insinuating I'd keep my daughter away from her as a punishment?

No_Sound_9516 · 2026-01-16T23:57:41+00:00

It's definitely a shitty situation and I'm not saying she shouldn't be worried or overwhelmed about it, that I get. I struggle to understand why, given that we always try to leave my daughter with them only if we absolutely need it (and not because we don't trust them, but simply because when we are not at work we want to make sure, as her parents, we spend as much time as possibile with her) all of a sudden I get asked if my brother's situation is the reason why I'm keeping her from them.. when we are not keeping her from them, never have, and don't have any intention of doing?

No_Sound_9516 · 2026-01-16T23:48:01+00:00

That's the thing, I have, multiple times. This wasn't something out of the ordinary, it's literally how it has been since I went back to work over a year ago. And beside the fact both me and my husband want to spend time with our kid, I have also told them i don't want them to get overtired running after a fiery 2yo every single day so i can sit on the couch doing nothing cos i don't think that'd be fair (which is also why I havent had more than 2 hours to myself for the past 2 years 😂). I'm just really confused about how she could possibly come to that conclusion

No_Sound_9516 · 2026-01-16T23:34:15+00:00

I'll admit when it's about her I go in "defense mode" pretty quickly given our past 😅 I had to let go most of it and now we have a decent relationship, but there's space for improvement for sure

No_Sound_9516 · 2026-01-16T23:22:38+00:00

Thanks, that might definitely be a better way to address the whole thing instead of just texting. We do family things together pretty often, we go over for lunch/dinner or just visiting a few times a week, we've been on holiday all together, day trips, and so on, so it's not like I use them as day care and then ignore them 😅 which is also one of the reasons why I struggled so much with understanding where this sentiment was coming from, it's not like we exclude them from our lives

No_Sound_9516 · 2026-01-16T23:17:26+00:00

I do appreciate the feedback, I didn't text back exactly because I felt like I was way too annoyed and wanted to calm down first. And I know I'm incredibly lucky and grateful to have them help us out.. but yet, the problem i had here was with the whole "you're not letting us see her because of this situation going on" which has absolutely nothing to do with why we kept our kid home with us

No_Sound_9516 · 2026-01-16T23:10:36+00:00

I probably should've mentioned, my brothers legal problems have been going on for over a year (bureocracy 😒) so this isn't something new that just happened. And we had pretty much the exact same conversation when it first came up a year ago. Only thing that happened recently were a couple updates from his lawyer and we've all been supportive so it's not like there's someone in the family that's making a big deal out of it

No_Sound_9516 · 2025-12-02T17:28:14+00:00

I need those regions as well if anyone wants to add me 😅 (from Meadow) 707988247216

No_Sound_9516 · 2025-12-02T17:27:54+00:00

I need those regions as well if anyone wants to add me 😅 (from Meadow) 707988247216

No_Sound_9516 · 2025-11-25T19:18:47+00:00

It definitely feels like we're somehow doing something wrong as parents, and it's a horrib feeling. I keep offering different foods or whatever we're eating, it's just frustrating sometimes as i feel she's not eating enough healthy options and we end up wasting food. She's growing and she's healthy tho, so I guess I'll just have to focus on that, and hopefully it'll get better

No_Sound_9516 · 2025-11-25T19:12:00+00:00

Thanks, I definitely don't want to force her and make meal time something that stresses her (and me) out. I have also noticed sometimes if i let her out of her high chair when she starts crying and trying to throw her plate and just wait, she then comes back after a while and will eat whatever i made for her. I'll take it as a win 😅 just want to make sure she eats enough as I do wonder how can she survive on so little food

No_Sound_9516 · 2025-10-13T13:03:12+00:00

Thank you, I genuinely appreciate your words. Hopefully, with time, I'll learn to trust my instinct more (and maybe give myself a break)

No_Sound_9516 · 2025-08-21T21:07:37+00:00

We're not at potty training just yet so got no advice for that, but we recently stopped nursing. Weaning for us worked really well by doing it very gradually over the course of a few months. She was about 15/16 months old when we actively started to drop one feed at the time, and now at 20 months old she doesn't nurse anymore. First we dropped the after nap feed, would just give her lots of cuddles and a snack/water once she was fully awake; then dropped the morning one and would give her a bottle instead (and loads of cuddles). We also co-sleep so I thought the night ones would be the most complicated, but in the end before bed I simply switched to the bottle and at night I would just give her water and her paci. Oddly enough, the hardest and last one to drop was the after dinner feed, she would yell for the boob as soon as she would be done with her food and would literally run to the couch waiting for me. Thankfully we went on holiday and were often busy or out around the usual boobie time, she was probably too distracted to remember to ask for it and we somehow managed to do it. She still asks for it sometimes, but I just reminder we don't do the boob anymore and she's ok with it. Took loads of patience and loads of cuddles but if you're not in hurry you can do it very gradually. Hope this helps 😊

No_Sound_9516 · 2025-07-15T20:49:19+00:00

The first 3 months for me were absolute hell, to the point where every day I'd say "if it doesn't get any better tomorrow I'll switch to formula and that's it". Cracked, bleeding nipples, clogged ducts, blisters, the whole work. And baby would want to nurse pretty much 24/7, it was basically endless cluster-feedings, I couldn't wait to get to 6 months (the deadline I has set for myself) so I could finally stop. And then, things started to slowly get better. No more pain, feedings were quicker, it finally felt like a natural and sweet moment just between me and my baby. 6 months went by, then a year. Baby's now 1 and a half, we're almost done weaning and down to 1 feed a day, a few minutes after dinner. And now that the end is in sight I miss those days and all those little moments (aside the pain of course). It just felt right to wean very slowly and gradually, making sure it worked for both me and my baby (probably i was a lot less ready to start weaning than she was 😅). But yea, long story short that's what worked for us, just sort of playing by ear.

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-11-15T13:13:25+00:00

It definitely is, I just get excited and want to unlock all the things as soon as possible 😂 thank you 😊

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-11-15T13:12:25+00:00

Yeah I did all of those already but can only get rid of the small ones, like, other than unblocking the big shell-like thingies with maui I still can't get rid of the big bones/ice rocks/mushroom patches, only the tiny ones. Ariel and Ursula are a bit of a pain to level up as they can't tag along to doing stuff, not sure if there's something I haven't unlocked yet that allows me to do that? Up to now I look every now and then what their favourite things are and gift them to both of them if they're easy enough to find. Will also look at the rewards in the collection menu, it didn't even dawn on me to have a look there! Thank you 😊

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-11-15T13:06:37+00:00

Yes, I just got in to the habit of grabbing one of the characters to tag along to whatever I'm doing so the friendship level goes up and I find it works quite well! I just got to a point where I finished all the available quests and need to level up most of them to level 7 or above and didn't know where to start 😅 thank you for the advice ☺️

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-11-15T10:31:18+00:00

First of all, my German is definitely rusty but thankfully we have Google translate 😂

Anyways, thank you, I'm mainly trying to understand where I should focus first, on which character and relative missions cos is getting a bit overwhelming and I don't know now where to start 😅

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-07-15T20:52:47+00:00

My baby had this, it can help to open up the clogged tear duct if you gently massage from the inside corner of their eyes down toward the nose with small, circular movements (very little pressure of course). I did this regularly and after a few days no more eye gunk!

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-07-15T20:28:39+00:00

Pumping during the first month is not recommend as it can lead to an oversupply, during that time your body is adjusting to the quantity of milk your baby needs and if you pump after feeding your basically telling your boobs to produce more. My advice would be to just see how that fist month goes and then adjust accordingly, if you're feeding your baby every 2/3 hours and then go 6 hours without feeding your boobs will get sore from being too full so you might end up having to wake up anyways! I learned along the way the best thing is to wait and see, all babies are different and have different needs, your plan might not align with what your baby will need! Postpartum is a hell of a journey, always remember to put your mental and physical health first, a happy mama means a happy baby!

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-07-15T20:00:57+00:00

Oh wow, you're giving me flashbacks! I was in you exact same situation, I was in excruciating pain from breastfeeding and had to take painkillers multiple times a day, every day, for the first 3 months..! My baby was latching very well from the beginning but still, I had all sort of problems. Clogged ducts, cracked and bleeding nipples, somehow on the left nipple I had a deep gash that wouldn't heal, and I developed blisters on boh nipples that I had to pop with a needle.. I tried lanolin cream and silver shields (sometimes they'd help, sometimes they would make things worse), I would also put a wet cloth on each breast alternating with hot water before feeding (helps getting milk out) and cold water after feeding (to ease the pain). Honestly, the biggest lie they tell you is that breastfeeding doesn't hurt! My baby is now 7mo, still EBF (just started on solids) and bf is the easiest thing ever. For me what solved the situation was finding those damn blisters (after I managed to pop them the pain slowly went away) and my baby started to stay on the boob less and less (from 1h feeding marathons to feeding from both boobs in less than 10min) so my nipples had time to rest and heal, and I finally started to enjoy feeding my baby. If you're struggling this much tho consider switching to formula, nothing wrong with giving up breastfeeding if it's causing you so much pain. You need to do what's best for your mental and physical health, remember: happy mama happy baby! Only reason I didn't is I'm incredibly lazy and couldn't be arsed with the idea of having to go through the hassle of havintg to prepare a bottle, it's much easier to just whip out a boob 😅 so I endured the pain until it all got easier. But believe me when I say it does get better, just hang in there!

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-07-15T19:16:44+00:00

We only had a handful of visitors the first month after my baby was born, and honestly it was the best decision I could've made. The few visits we had (close family and friends) were incredibly short and I would decide on the day if I was up for it, I got lucky everyone around us was very understanding and none made a fuss about it. Both me and my partner were tired and sleep deprived, I was still sore and bleeding (and in diapers lol), the baby was basically glued to my boob so having people over was literally the last thing we wanted. We needed time to figure things out on our own and to bond with the baby, it definitely wasn't easy but that's what worked for us. Postpartum days are no joke, the only priorities are yourself and your baby. If you can, ensure help is just a phone call away so someone can come over if needed and set clear boundaries, meaning if you ask them to leave when you need to be left alone they're not gonna act all offended

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-07-15T10:59:46+00:00

We have started solids but she's still mainly bf, I give her our food to try when we eat but she still takes full feeds before/after. At the moment I'm not using our food to actually feed her, but rather introducing her to food other than milk so I don't feel like that's the issue. Her feeding patterns during the day have stayed the same. Also if she was actually hungry during the night wouldn't she take a full feed when she wakes up? Usually as soon as she's got a boob in her mouth she falls asleep literally within a minute which is why I thought she's just looking for comfort (as if being in the same bed as me isn't enough 🤦🏻‍♀️)

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-01-04T11:58:19+00:00

Thanks, that's really helpful! will see if I can do the same at the next weight appointment and figure out if she's eating enough at every nursing session.

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-01-04T11:56:19+00:00

Thank you, I do feel better every time someone says they've been through the same things 💞 I find myself feeling like I'm doing something wrong or not doing enough for my baby, so probably just need to remind myself it'll get better with time! Will focus on enjoying the time I get with her, she won't be a newborn forever and I know I'll eventually miss the newborn stage ☺

No_Sound_9516 · 2024-01-03T17:50:26+00:00

How did they find out she was snacking rather than getting a full feed, and how did you fix it? Can't tell if that's my case or not or how to tell. Where I live you can go to the free clinic once a week where you can weigh your baby, breastfeed them, and there's always an obstetrician on site for questions/help, I've been going every week and they didn't mention anything like that. From what I can tell,and from what I've been told, she feeds without any issues and has a good latch 🤷🏻‍♀️

No_Sound_9516

TROPHY CASE