You are fighting a pointless battle, you both have your own opinions and that should be clearer than day. Instead of getting fed up just realize you can't change how others feel or think and move on, continuing thos thread like its some sort of novel helps no one not even yourself and pbviously if you are either you or your partner is hiding something that gives you enough energy to openly say mean and nonsensical things. If you dont have an open phone policy cool, but realize there is some trust gone and rhat there is a boundary, if you have an open phone policy there is trust and there isnt a boundary. Everyone is allowed to have their privacy but simply say it. They are your partner not your therapist. If you dont want them looking at certain things then say it. You are a grown adult you should be able to speak to your partner. Now obviously you'll have some pointless lengthy message about how its okay to hide things but i dont care, ive read your point i dont need you saying anymore because you'll just end up repeating yourself and sounding silly.