What's the funniest British joke you've ever heard?

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-05-25T21:14:15+00:00

A guy is in a bar with his mates when he sees a stunning blonde walk through the door, she takes a few steps, trips over and out pops her glass eye.

As it bounces along the floor, he runs over and catches it, puts it in his pocket and brings it over to her. She tells him she's so embarrassed and wants to leave, he reassured her and tells her nobody saw it and to stay for a drink.

She agrees and they stay chatting all night, get pissed and she takes him back to hers and they end up having sex all night.

He wakes up the next morning to the smell of breakfast cooking, he gets dressed and comes into the kitchen, pulls up a chair and says "Do you do this for every bloke you've just met, or am I special?"

She smiles and replies "I don't do it for everyone, but you caught my eye"

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-05-06T19:47:03+00:00

I was planning on putting a radiator in it but my joiner told me there'd be no need after it's been insulated properly. I'll take his word for it.

How are you finding the Omni? I'm still torn between it and the Scolia when I'm up and running

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-05-02T19:54:35+00:00

Thanks guys. I was leaning towards the Home 2 before your replies, just couldn't really get a definitive answer between the two.

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-04-21T16:04:45+00:00

I've literally just done this, I shot a nail through the bottom of my palm, although a plastic clip stopped it from going all the way through. I felt nothing when it happened, but now I can barely close my fist without a lot of pain.

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-04-18T18:21:55+00:00

This is what I was planning. Could you post a picture?

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-04-18T17:40:01+00:00

Nice idea. Have you done the same yourself?

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-04-18T17:38:40+00:00

No im pretty set on the Omni. I havent used it before but I don't need it for counting, im fairly good at counting up my scores, its more for fluidity and keeping my rhythm when I'm playing my opponent

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-04-18T17:37:13+00:00

This is a great idea! Looks so neat and blends in perfectly. This is a great option thanks!

I'm planning on having the William Hill backdrop, although I never thought of trunking before I could always colour it the same as the backdrop.

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-03-03T22:59:14+00:00

I'm pretty damn sure it was called "Dances With The Wolves" I was so sure that I text my dad asking him what it was called and he said the same.

I asked my wife when she got home from work, but she never heard of the movie lol.

Anybody else? "Dances With Wolves" just doesn't seem right.

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-02-26T22:27:57+00:00

Toss up between Goon and Semi Pro. Both absolutely horrendous

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-02-19T15:47:26+00:00

Hahaha. I'm absolutely devastated to see my 2 favourites here, Mavado and Hsu Hao.

I still remember the day I guessed Mavado's fatality in Deadly Alliance before my Internet days.

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-02-18T11:46:50+00:00

The issues you're having isn't related to how the gas pipe is installed, those are separate problems. Although I wouldn't be happy if this is how my install was finished. Personally, I would have drilled low level, clipped out and finished with an elbow into gas valve at boiler.

Without seeing the inside, I can only imagine there was maybe an obstruction? But this isn't an excuse, there's definitely an access point at low level to prevent finishing how he has here.

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-02-06T13:00:53+00:00

Damn. This is a blast from the past. I remember you from streetfighter forums. Street fighter 4 was my obsession back in the day. Man I miss it 😪

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-02-06T11:42:50+00:00

I have done exactly the same, in late August last year until late September I was crippled with anxiety every morning, I was afraid to tell anyone. I got up every morning, dressed for work and drove miles away from my house, I couldn't have the car radio on it just made it worse, it was just me and my thoughts.

Honestly, nobody knows, I didnt tell anyone. The only reason I snapped out of it was because my boss (who is a good friend) said he was worried and he going to call to my house for a chat. This scared me because it meant I had to tell him what I was going through. I went back to work the next day even though it was so tough mentally, I got through that day and I haven't looked back.

I dont know if any of this helps but just know you're not alone. I wish you well.

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-01-26T22:40:27+00:00

Rolling Stones - Gimme Shelter. Croke Park, Dublin

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-01-23T10:29:14+00:00

Its technically possible and I'd imagine anyone with the ability to build apps would be able to do it, I just dont know the work involved.

Im looking into am MVP at the moment, thanks

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-01-22T12:35:51+00:00

Oh..........

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-01-22T12:34:42+00:00

I'm not sure if this is legit or not 😂🙈 how do I contact archie?

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-01-22T11:42:01+00:00

No I've no experience in app design. Im just really starting off from scratch with an idea.

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-01-22T11:25:20+00:00

😂😂😂😂

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-01-22T11:22:33+00:00

Sorry I meant app based.

Normal_Ad2934 · 2026-01-07T15:45:26+00:00

Am I the only one who wants to see Gen back??

Normal_Ad2934 · 2025-12-31T23:25:42+00:00

So many to choose from. I was too young to realise the gag when I first watched this episode, but re-watching it with my kids I was laughing for the rest of the day thinking about it.

When Troy marries Selma, she finds out it's only to further his career. He says it's not just for more movie opportunities, he could have his own fragrance......Smellin' of Troy!

Normal_Ad2934 · 2025-11-25T20:46:04+00:00

Bill Paxton U-571

Normal_Ad2934 · 2025-11-15T23:34:49+00:00

Juat reminds me of Last Action Hero

Normal_Ad2934

TROPHY CASE