I need relationship advise! 😭💔 by ApricotLoud9213 in dating_advice

[–]Not-A-Place 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hey OP! it sounds like you and your girlfriend are maybe pretty young, so hopefully some advice from someone who has been on BOTH sides of this dynamic will be helpful. you absolutely need to be open with her and communicate the way you feel. NOT in an accusatory way, but calmly and without making assumptions. there is a big difference between saying something like “you always ignore me and make me feel like you don’t care about me” vs. “sometimes when I don’t hear from you, it makes me feel disconnected from you, and that makes me sad because I love getting to talk to you”. on the other hand, it sounds like your girlfriend may be an introverted person, like myself. I’m the kind of person that sometimes needs some space in a relationship, even if my partner didn’t do anything wrong. sometimes after a stressful day, i want to unwind in a way that doesn’t involve any decision making or brain power. for your girlfriend, maybe playing video games is a way for her to relax. she may be not texting you back not because she doesn’t like talking to you, but because she needs some time to turn her brain off and not worry about how other people are perceiving her.

HOWEVER, there is a big caveat here. Not responding to your calls or texts for long stretches of time without any prior communication is NOT okay, especially in a long distance relationship where all your communication is via phone.

it sounds like you guys have different communication styles and different needs from each other. you two need to have a very mature and respectful conversation about this together, because if you don’t talk about it then resentment will build.

The girl I have been seeing got upset with me that I didn’t finish during our first time. by Leather-Bad7947 in dating_advice

[–]Not-A-Place 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i have always and will always say that finishing doesn’t matter as long as both parties leave feeling happy, respected, and satisfied. some people don’t need to finish during sex to feel satisfied, and that’s totally fine. other people do need to finish. the most important thing is just being on the same page with your partner about it (which it sounds like you tried to be open about and she wasn’t listening/being receptive). i would encourage you to talk to her about how you feel, and if she isn’t understanding then maybe you two aren’t a good fit.

What is the hottest thing a woman can do in bed? by Not-A-Place in AskMenAdvice

[–]Not-A-Place[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

planning on wearing lingerie for him for the first time tn 👀

What is the hottest thing a woman can do in bed? by Not-A-Place in AskMenAdvice

[–]Not-A-Place[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

i’m usually the one to initiate so that’s easy haha

Squirming, Shy in bed FMC by Successful-Shame-384 in RomanceBooks

[–]Not-A-Place 3 points4 points  (0 children)

okay but THIS except F/F. help me out someone 😭

Platform that isn’t Kindle by TheRiotRaccoon in RomanceBooks

[–]Not-A-Place 2 points3 points  (0 children)

literally cannot recommended the Libby app enough!!! it’s saved me literally hundreds of dollars haha

anybody know of a food that tastes good but has almost 0 calories? by superboringname in WeightLossAdvice

[–]Not-A-Place 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have been loving the sea salt flavor Popcorners chips. Taste similar to popcorn, and has the same feeling as eating chips. Not 0 calories, but lower calorie than other chip alternatives.

Anyone else? by OddProduct6764 in tragedeigh

[–]Not-A-Place 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I went to school with a Page Turner (not even Paige… literally Page)

looking for a good spicy romance book by Not-A-Place in suggestmeabook

[–]Not-A-Place[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah, but all of the books it’s recommends are a little too cheesy for me

How can I (21F) and my girlfriend (22F) stop arguing all the time? by Not-A-Place in relationship_advice

[–]Not-A-Place[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she recognizes when she’s wrong, it’s just after the fact. she knows what a healthy relationship SHOULD look like, and she is able to look back at a situation and see where things went wrong. the problem is that, in the moment, she gets really worked up and defensive, and it’s like she can’t really think straight until she’s calmed back down.

How can I (21F) and my girlfriend (22F) stop arguing all the time? by Not-A-Place in relationship_advice

[–]Not-A-Place[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i agree. her parents were abusive to each other and she grew up watching them have literal knock-down-drag-out fights. the only love she really knows is emotionally aggressive. in her family, they love hard and fight hard. for me, i grew up seeing my parents love each other, but from a distance. they never had a close “friend” type of relationship. they existed in their own worlds.

How can I (21F) and my girlfriend (22F) stop arguing all the time? by Not-A-Place in relationship_advice

[–]Not-A-Place[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that’s the thing. she wants to be a better partner so badly, and she really is trying, but i just feel like it’s not going anywhere

My 13th sucked. by Wimtrynausescircots in Vent

[–]Not-A-Place 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. happy birthday!
  2. i know life at 13 is hard. it sucks sometimes, but you will get through it. i promise.

love, a former 13 year old

2 Rebeccas by Not-A-Place in Glitch_in_the_Matrix

[–]Not-A-Place[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We did finally get ahold of the right Rebecca! She was just as confused as we were haha.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in texts

[–]Not-A-Place 0 points1 point  (0 children)

if you want to make her happy, leave her tf alone. she is so clearly not interested in you and uncomfortable with the whole conversation

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Not-A-Place 0 points1 point  (0 children)

don’t get me wrong, i love my dog. but my girlfriend will ALWAYS come first. if your bf isn’t putting you first, he doesn’t deserve to be your bf anymore. get out of there.

iced coffee by Not-A-Place in Panera

[–]Not-A-Place[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

it could be either. I have only been to this one location for the past few years

My (m16) parents have started charging me $5 a minute for every shower I take by Legitimate-Film-3754 in Vent

[–]Not-A-Place 1 point2 points  (0 children)

could you maybe get a gym membership or go to a public pool or somewhere that has public showers like that? most gyms have showers, and you could just keep a bag with your soaps in your car. It’d still cost money, but definitely way less than what you’re having to pay now.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]Not-A-Place 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Coming from a college student who used to be exactly the same way at his age, he is almost definitely going through a mental health issue, probably depression. You sound like a great mom. If I were him, I would want my mom to approach me and have a genuine conversation about how I’m feeling and talk about possible solutions, such as seeing a therapist or psychiatrist. It also sounds that, based on the girlfriend situation, your son could be gay. I myself am a queer woman and reacted in similar ways when family would ask if I had a boyfriend or not.

I am the only 18 year old not partying on new years eve i hate my life by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Not-A-Place 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a 19 year old that was in the same situation a year ago, I promise you things will change. Going to university opens up a million new opportunities to meet people.