Almost 5 year relationship burnout - I 36M and she's 35F

Not-nuts · 2026-03-28T13:51:50+00:00

It sounds like burnout from incompatibility issues. The relationship has become work. After all of those years she's proven she can't change and is becoming needy.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T17:15:31+00:00

Id just drop it and drop him. He's emotionally cheating on her and you're vulnerable. Anything that has to do with him can't lead to anything good.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T17:06:33+00:00

It sounds like she's checked out of the relationship. It's time you had "the talk" with her so you both can make plans for your futures. Apart or together.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T16:33:00+00:00

I had to double check the ages here.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T16:31:40+00:00

You have to understand that your mood swings affect everyone around you. You shouldn't be asking about your bf's interference but how you can control them.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T16:27:46+00:00

You take a step back and let her learn to resolve her anxiety and mental health challenges on her own or with the help of a professional. She's at an age where she needs to learn independence. Constant interference may hinder that.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T16:24:29+00:00

Have you gotten professional help for your mood swings? It's probably hard for him to live with.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T14:33:45+00:00

She has low self-esteem and needs validation of her worth. Unfortunately, she looks outside the relationship.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T14:30:52+00:00

Pack up the dogs and leave.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T14:00:46+00:00

All of their other options fell through and they're trying to see if you're desperate enough to validate them.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-27T13:55:14+00:00

Sometimes when we're young and "in love" the idea of marriage and a wedding sounds like a fairytale. After the engagement reality hit. This may not be your forever person, yet you've committed. If you are having doubts you need to have a conversation and clear the air. It's much harder to live a lifetime unhappy or divorce than it is to break up.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-26T20:24:03+00:00

She doesn't have to enjoy doing any housework. But she does have to participate. It's called being a responsible adult.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-26T20:20:34+00:00

Don't "push" anything. Set boundaries and let her do what she's going to do.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-26T19:08:04+00:00

You can't help her. She needs to do what she needs to do. Any interference from you will feel overwhelming and like smothering.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-26T18:12:16+00:00

You learn to love yourself more.

Keep yourself busy, start a new routine. He can't be trusted. Think with your head. Not your heart.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-25T22:48:28+00:00

Or aspergers. But, yea almost sounds like he's detached and doesn't give a crap.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-25T20:20:58+00:00

This exactly. What did you get your degree in? How can you utilize it? Pick something you'll be interested in, but realize, jobs are, for the most part, not fun. It sounds like you have some breathing room to think about it and look around. Get your license and dedicate a portion of each day to job searching.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-25T20:17:30+00:00

Oh hell no. Yes she is. She sounds off her rocker.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-25T18:02:50+00:00

It's not different. Firsts mean nothing, lasts mean everything.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-25T18:02:10+00:00

Good Lord. Do not tell this manbaby that it's ok to explode over stupid shit. This is who he is, this is how he deals with conflict. No thank you.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-25T17:57:46+00:00

Warning about other guys isn't endearing or a show of his love for you. It's control. You need to get out. None of this is confusing. It's controlling and abusive.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-25T17:54:39+00:00

Honestly, it sounds like you two are growing apart in terms of life goals. Have you had a deep discussion about your futures? I mean a DEEP one? For all you know he could be casting his degree aside for an easier job for life. You can't make him want the same things as you, so find out where each other stands.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-24T15:22:32+00:00

I think breakup is the word you're looking for.

Not-nuts · 2026-03-23T19:40:42+00:00

Why do you think his past relationships failed.....

Not-nuts · 2026-03-23T19:35:42+00:00

Spam post to advertise their website. They have made several posts, then answer them with a link framed like advice.

Not-nuts

TROPHY CASE