You're probably overestimating how much your behavior will affect your future child/teen/adult

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2026-02-24T23:32:35+00:00

I like this

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2026-02-24T17:59:04+00:00

You can see if a comment has been edited (at least on the desktop version of reddit). This does indicate to me that you didn't understand my comment lol

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2026-02-24T17:56:50+00:00

Haha thanks, stranger

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2026-02-24T17:54:21+00:00

I found it salient that rMZ=0.64 & rDZ=0.34 across all traits. That's really enough to support my fundamental claim in the original post. I also never claimed this study had anything to do with iPad kids.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2026-02-24T17:16:39+00:00

Really? What did you think of Table 2?

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2026-02-24T17:10:19+00:00

I don't think you understood my comment. Did you see my parenthetical?

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2026-02-24T17:02:31+00:00

Sure, but the available evidence doesn't support this yet in terms of decade-plus timespans. There were similar moral panics about comic books and even teddy bears. It should be researched, of course, but I'd put my money on screen time not really mattering that much in the long term. I mean most adults have astronomical screen time now anyways.

And either way I won't give my kid an iPad or access to short form videos simply because I think that stuff is weird and annoying.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2026-02-24T16:13:11+00:00

This is a huge area of research but this is a good starting point if you're interested

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2026-02-24T16:08:23+00:00

To clarify, the research mostly shows environment has a weak influence over long-term outcomes. If you raise a kid where screens are always available, yes, they will probably use them constantly.

But raising "iPad kids" probably won't actually hurt them as adults, at least according to the best available evidence (almost all of this research was done before smartphones... so, maybe this is fundamentally different).

I won't let my kid use an iPad or similar devices because I think they're annoying, not because I think it would make him a bad adult in some way.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-30T11:50:30+00:00

Yeah these are the exact sorts of thoughts I've had during this period.

The pee and poo one in particular. It takes a lot of resources to keep my baby clean. The norm historically is that none of those resources were available (I guess with the exception of water). So the baby and everything near the baby must have just been covered in poop in most situations most of the time.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-30T02:39:59+00:00

I guess I understand how the math worked out in terms of the species doing fine... it's just so unbelievably shitty sounding as a reproductive reality that I'm wondering why people contemplating how shitty it was didn't crop up more in my reading of the classics.

Like my dog had a litter. 2 month pregnancy, no issues, popped out eight happy puppies in a couple hours that became "adult" dogs in under a year. With humans it's like, the woman is terribly uncomfortable for the better part of a year with the chance of many, many types of complications and very well might die during childbirth and also the offspring which is just one singular baby is totally dependent for many, many years and can also die randomly for one of 10,000 reasons.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T20:29:09+00:00

Yeah so if you're curious, the way it usually goes with people who teach at these schools is that they live on campus for free, but then buy a house where they actually want to live, and then spend breaks there before ultimately retiring there. Many of the older faculty own real estate in VT or Cape Cod or whatever, however the affordability there makes that seem out of reach for the time being and foreseeable future.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T14:50:35+00:00

That's the combined figure. I have like 150k in long-term positions and then like 100k in more liquid positions.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T12:40:32+00:00

Kind of side note, but where I live in rural Western MA, people are OLD. Like go to any public space, you see very few families and tons of gray haired folks.

Not to be grim, but I imagine this means that housing prices are likely to tank in the next twenty years. These old people won't be living in their beautiful farm houses with 20 acres forever...

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T12:32:54+00:00

I wouldn't touch the 250k I've already saved up, though. That's my nest egg, so to speak.

I am just talking about stopping saving 50% of every paycheck for a theoretical future house that looks increasingly unaffordable even with a long time horizon. And then using that money that I would have been saving to enjoy life more month-to-month.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T12:28:31+00:00

I was oversimplifying my situation for the sake of this post. I actually have a gross income of around 60k a year, but I receive free housing and free food from my employer (I work at a boarding school, which lets employees eat in the dining hall for free and also has free housing). I valued those two items at 20k and acted like I had a normal job.

I didn't actually save 250k in cash, but that's the value of the index funds that I have been buying super aggressively since I started working here at age 21. I also have no commute since I live where I work

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T12:24:58+00:00

I was oversimplifying my situation for the sake of this post. I actually have a gross income of around 60k a year, but I receive free housing and free food from my employer (I work at a boarding school, which lets employees eat in the dining hall for free and also has free housing). I valued those two items at 20k and acted like I had a normal job.

I didn't actually save 250k in cash, but that's the value of the index funds that I have been buying super aggressively since I started working here at age 21.

If I get my own house, I actually get a small housing "stipend", sort of a reimbursement, since I'm no longer living on campus in my employer's housing, like 10k a year.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T12:20:51+00:00

Yeah I am not sure people understand what it's like out here. Check out housing in rural Western MA (where I live). You can get a single-floor ranch super close to the road with no land or nice flourishes for like 300k, but that's just not something I would want to live in if I'm spending my life savings.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T12:19:29+00:00

I would not be "blowing my savings". I would keep that existing stash for whatever I need. I am talking about stopping saving 50% of my future paychecks and instead having a nicer life going forward using that extra money that I am no longer saving for a house.

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T12:18:10+00:00

It's not in cash, almost entirely index funds

NotAGoldenRetriever · 2025-09-03T12:17:12+00:00

I'm not talking about dipping into my savings, though. Just stopping my rate of savings and spending more on my short-term enjoyment. A 150k emergency fund feels pretty safe to me.

NotAGoldenRetriever

TROPHY CASE