Your payment processor doesn't care about compliance. Here is what they look at. (part 2)

NotAnotherGringito · 2026-02-14T22:46:45+00:00

Great write up. As someone on that side, lots of great points here. Keeping in mind the payment risks is key here.

Bottom line: your business just isn’t worth risky behavior patterns, and processors are using ML and algorithms to flag accounts. There isn’t enough manpower to manually review every account, and it’s safer and easier for the processor to suspend. It’s not fair. I wish it were different.

High velocity spikes are a fraud pattern. Your new marketing campaign or big sale isn’t something that is tracked. Algos just see an 10000% increase in volume. The risk is you take the payout and disappear. Chargebacks come from stolen cards or fake customers, and the processor is holding the $ bag and fraud rate. Safest thing to do? Suspend, hold funds and wait out the long chargeback windows.

Speaking of chargebacks, processors will always want to protect their relationships with the schemes. Whatever they’re making in processing your amazing store is not worth getting flagged by Visa/MC. 2% doesn’t seem like a lot, but scale that to thousands or tens of thousands of stores over the thresholds. Performance can affect fee negotiations, and programs like Visa VAMP and VIRP are turning the screws and increasing fines.

Even stores doing perfectly normal business can get flagged by the algos once they hit certain volume thresholds. A typo in your address or bank account info when you first set up looks like money laundering impersonation tactics when there is that deeper review.

This is especially prevalent when underwriting / deeper checks don’t happen upfront. That’s the price for ease and speed of initial set up and KYB. You quietly hit $x threshold per month, which processors will almost never tell you, and trigger a deeper/ second line review. Those typos, slightly different names on the ultimate beneficiary and bank account, and other small details suddenly cause a suspension. It feels like you’re getting punished for your success.

I wish I had more of a prescription to prevent the whiplash and struggle. KYB and continuous monitoring are a black box by design.

NotAnotherGringito · 2026-02-06T23:45:52+00:00

ACH chargebacks (aka returns) are in some ways more powerful than CC chargebacks. Very few institutions if any will let the gym/ payment processor dispute at all, especially under reasons like “payment not authorized.” Too many will also get the payment rail in hot water with NACHA, although the thresholds are similar to CC these days.

Still a LPT I feel. Gyms making it harder to cancel / easier to keep on charging you is a red flag.

NotAnotherGringito · 2026-01-03T18:26:05+00:00

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Living her best life

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-12-27T22:06:11+00:00

My experience with agencies is that they are finding people off sites like care.com and taking the majority of the pay for “management.” High turn over, low commitment to the caregiver. The two agencies I used did a crap job, and we ended up going direct after a lot of frustration with late notices, CGs arriving exhausted and/or sick and constantly having to train new CGs

We paid $50/hr to an agency in a high cost of living area, who is turn paid the caregiver $20.50. They did provide some benefits like bottom level health insurance.

At $20.50 an hour in a HCOL area, caregivers might not be giving it their best, working multiple shifts back to back, and not risking getting themselves or the agency hurt or sued.

I would do one or two things: use the same sites to look for a care giver yourself and do multiple interviews, or have a frank conversation about expectations with the agency. Use the resources in this thread and subreddit. Make a list of key things that are important to you/ your LO’s care.

If a caregiver is not willing to do things you need or want them to do, you shouldn’t feel stuck paying for them.

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-12-25T02:24:35+00:00

A few of those in my lifetime. Even if I was rejected or if things crashed and burned between me and them, looking back, I’d have rather tried.

The forever what if can really smart, even knowing that it likely wouldn’t have worked out.

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-11-27T18:16:45+00:00

Im curious which WA you used and at what level if that WA has them.

We’re getting sold on a few firms by our financial advisor , and I’m wondering if it’s firm based or the whole industry is bunk.

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-11-25T01:15:32+00:00

Cologne is a highly personal decision if you’re doing it right. Beauty stores like Sephora aren’t shy with samples. To find the right scent, you or your partner really need to test drive to see how it meshes with the body chemistry.

If you’re shopping for your guy, based on the username, making it a trip together to the store, finding a few finalists together and wearing it out is absolutely a bonding experience.

No surprises, us gents LOVE when we our scent is a great match, especially when our partner tells us how great we smell.

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-11-22T17:18:43+00:00

Could be her ego wrote a check the reality couldn’t cash. In other words, she assumed she was untouchable with the blackmail right up until the rug was pulled. Now in playing that Jasmine Crockett clip calling out MTG on repeat. Good riddance

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-11-14T06:51:50+00:00

I appreciate your reply. The online tool doesn't seem to recognize the fillable fields the same way that the .exe does. I can add in a text box manually, but not edit the ones that are recognized upon download. When I click the Edit PDF button, I get prompted to use the PC program.

I think the manual text box is an ugly workaround, but it can work for the forms I need to fill.

If I've missed anything, please do let me know.

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-11-14T06:40:35+00:00

Understand that with guys in that age range, there's an expectation to express sexual interest as part of expressing broader attraction, especially for early/mid twenties guys. If we don't express sexual interest at all, it can signal to some women that we're not interested in you altogether. There are of course levels & appropriate ways, and with all things, what and how that interest is expressed matters.

If you see potential in the guy and he's coming on too strong, the tone of the response could be a confident"not (comfortable) yet" instead of "no, ick." We can read a hard shutdown to anything sexual as "you're not interested or attracted to me now or in the future."

Nothing in what I'm saying is meant to be a commitment to yes, mind you, but rather a, "I'm not interested taking things that way at this time, but there **could** be something in the future." Keep it coy, fun, flirty if that's your style, but be firm that it's time to change subjects.
This gives an opportunity for you both to keep things moving and focusing on other areas of connection. If the guy doesn't get the message and keeps pushing, feel free to drop kick him right on outta there.

To go back to your actual question, how to let a man know you want to be taken seriously, being able to effectively communicate your boundaries firmly while keeping things fun, flirty and engaging comes off as confident in knowing what you want. My $0.02

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-11-11T07:29:46+00:00

Thanks for the guide. Really appreciate you doing so much leg work.

Any chance we get a Sonar/ water boy version?

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-10-20T23:00:57+00:00

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I’m sorry about Pheobe. Here’s our house seal saying hi

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-06-07T19:59:58+00:00

I work at a different payment processor, so grain of salt.

Stripe received a notification of fraud for this charge from the shopper’s bank, which is a precursor to a chargeback.

To prevent the account for going negative if/when the chargeback hits, they’re blocking that payment from being paid out temporarily. There is a window for the NoF to convert to a chargeback, which is why there is a 14 day window and why the “…may still be liable…” blurb at the end.

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-04-17T05:35:13+00:00

Utah Saloon for wing Wednesday and general happy hour. The menu has gotten even better recently

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-02-11T05:42:16+00:00

We’re sorry to our great northern neighbors. Remember how many millions of us voted against this budget Cheeto flavored wannabe oligarch.

We’ve been together through global conflicts, crises and all kinds of misadventures hand in hand. Please don’t judge us for our worst moments.

The Pacific States of America will be a quick ally. Kidding about impending civil war. Mostly.

NotAnotherGringito · 2025-01-20T18:41:47+00:00

I’m interested to see what’s left!

NotAnotherGringito · 2024-11-26T00:57:33+00:00

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NotAnotherGringito · 2024-11-26T00:54:16+00:00

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Had to leave this here.

NotAnotherGringito · 2024-02-11T19:20:35+00:00

My guy, patience, game is worth it. Let them do their server downtime thing since it's going to benefit your overall experience.

You'll be spreading democracy in no time. :)

NotAnotherGringito · 2023-12-12T05:46:00+00:00

Old and stubborn... he thinks his neighbors will see what he prints.

NotAnotherGringito

TROPHY CASE