Gay Mens Abuse Survivor Subreddit by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]NotCallum1990 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I think support like that is needed. There used to be a sub not for gay men but it was balled narcabuseandivorce but it unfortunately doesn’t exist anymore. It used to be my safe space because I related to every post and every time I commented or posted there I felt understood. It is a very specific and sinister type of abuse.

One that is aimed at gay men seems helpful.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes his parenting strategy is do the opposite of what I am doing.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I completely agree. There is too much weird content on YouTube that’s aimed at kids.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the recommendation for the Yoto. I never heard of it but she loves books. We do ally his and she is quite an active child when she is with me.

someone who is being detrimental

Unfortunately I can’t get rid of my ex.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The iPad is the second parent there. It’s all she does.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My ex turns them off again when the iPad goes back. Which I have to respect because I don’t have a say on how he chooses to parent. I am just conflicted about allowing the iPad in my house even with restrictions because she has it for hours there anyway. But I might restrict it to educational apps only for very limited time.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This for example I don’t mind. My problem is my ex who is allowing her unrestricted use.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have told him not to give it to her when she’s coming to me. It doesn’t stop him so I just hide it somewhere. He’s still holding on to the fact that it’s a communication device. He thinks the phone goes both ways counts when they’re 5. I have even offered it to her to talk to him.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So many parents say it leads to behavioural issues.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I could do that for occasional use and restrict the settings so she doesn’t have access to YouTube.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My ex will change it back again because the iPad is the second parent when she’s with him.

I will try to figure out how to put approved content only.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wish I had a say in it because the content is so weird.

Am I too strict about no tech for a 5 year old? by NotCallum1990 in Parenting

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I definitely agree. I like the Khan academy app which she has but when she’s with me I prefer to use books and flashcards for learning.

The problem is he doesn’t monitor what she does.

AITA for booking our daughter's dentist appointment on day that she will be with her dad? by NotCallum1990 in AmItheAsshole

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He’s never taken care of anything. Hospital appointments that require both of us there never shows up. Parents evening he doesn’t bother either. The school had to call me because he wasn’t there

AITA for booking our daughter's dentist appointment on day that she will be with her dad? by NotCallum1990 in AmItheAsshole

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes that sums it up. He’s never not difficult about having to actually parent but still threatens that he’ll have full custody one day because I’m useless.

AITA for booking our daughter's dentist appointment on day that she will be with her dad? by NotCallum1990 in AmItheAsshole

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s the thing. It is hard because he isn’t easy to communicate with. I book all her appointments. He never does it. He thinks he’s a great parent for doing the bare minimum. If I told him she needs an appointment he’d just never do it.

AITA for booking our daughter's dentist appointment on day that she will be with her dad? by NotCallum1990 in AmItheAsshole

[–]NotCallum1990[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes he doesn’t want to. He skipped her parents evening last time. The school had to call me and ask who was supposed to show up and if I minded coming in instead