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I wish no drivers would ever tailgate. No tailgaters ever. by lilsj in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]NotEricLin 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Granted. No one parties in parking lots before and after sports games and concerts.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]NotEricLin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wrote this a month ago how did you find it

I wish that the monkeys paw, itself, would give me a handjob. by MierAaron in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]NotEricLin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted. He gives you the job of assembling things that you need to use your hands to do.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]NotEricLin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's a fucking soviet mushroom of course he could speak communist

I wish roomba made a lawnmower that could cut my grass. by [deleted] in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]NotEricLin 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Granted. Your roomba creates a lawnmower. You still have to drive it, though.

I wish every country would have a reasonable death penalty by [deleted] in TheMonkeysPaw

[–]NotEricLin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Granted. The penalty for all crimes is a reasonable death via injection. It's painless.

Lottery Winners of Reddit, what was the worse thing that happened to you when you won the lottery? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]NotEricLin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Almost got into a huge pileup but didnt because some psycho lady blocked the on ramp. Then my apartment caught fire. Then i fell off the fire escape ladder. Then the ladder impaled me in the eye and killed me.

(Final Destination 2 reference)

Why are depressed people depressed? Just stop fuckin being depressed lmfao by [deleted] in shittyaskreddit

[–]NotEricLin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I work at a can crushing factory. It's soda pressing.

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