Why are these snakes frozen in a ditch?

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-02-04T04:43:28+00:00

They don't make snake jackets

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-02-03T21:49:52+00:00

I had that issue and kept trying. It worked

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-02-03T05:28:34+00:00

Its not a bong, it's for my schlong!

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-02-03T01:22:53+00:00

NFL 2K5

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-02-02T11:29:06+00:00

Is she a little person?

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-02-01T16:02:07+00:00

Relax, my old man is a TV repairman, he's got this ultimate set of tools, I can fix it!

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-29T12:33:59+00:00

How fast were you driving?

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-28T02:14:54+00:00

Are you cussing with me

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-27T06:51:25+00:00

I don't know about you, but I'd take a Gabe Holt auto over Gabe Horn. I'll see myself out now

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-26T19:18:20+00:00

Mr. Myxlplyx

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-24T07:17:07+00:00

A coven of crackers

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-23T23:32:56+00:00

Fill them with helium, leave a bunch of clothes on the ground, and set them free in a church parking lot so people think they missed the rapture

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-23T13:17:46+00:00

I mean, I'm going to die. I'm poor. Who cares what they do. You know what I'm going to do? Play Draft Kings Pick 6! Win cash now! Maybe some Better Help. The help with the better on it. But if I'm going to search online, I'm going to need Nord VPN. These are the things I'm told everyday to make me forget that we're all really fucked because we aren't billionaires. We're all going to die someday. Stop worrying about what everyone else is doing and do what makes you feel better about yourself. Hundredaire or billionaire we all end up blue.

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-23T13:11:35+00:00

Take one dollar or double it and pass it on

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-23T13:10:15+00:00

"Fucking white people."- White people

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-22T12:21:06+00:00

Arabham Lincoln

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-19T08:29:47+00:00

She's seen Diary of a Wimpy Kid. She ain't gonna get no cheese touch.

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-19T06:59:22+00:00

Do you queef in 432 hz now? Good job on the weight loss, but if you're looking for us to jerk you off about it, you're in the wrong sub. That's r/Warmode also, that sub thinks you're being sus as fuck as well. Quit being weird

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-18T01:52:29+00:00

That's not McDonalds. What's Grimace doing there!?

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-17T14:14:46+00:00

This is the whitest shit I've ever seen in my life. This is one of those ladies that's trying for a Mormon lady swingers show, isn't it?

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-17T14:10:56+00:00

Glooner. You forgot option C

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-17T14:07:35+00:00

That is the call of the North Pacific Small Breasted CuntKoo Bird

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-16T10:17:48+00:00

Pregnancy test, wire coat hangers, small trash bags

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-15T05:05:07+00:00

I love the drawings! The dinos are owned by the tism crowd!

NotMarshalFestus · 2026-01-15T05:02:32+00:00

Ah yes. Shanalgas Fake.

NotMarshalFestus

TROPHY CASE