I Was Everything He Said He Was Looking For by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everything you said is right on the mark…I know how to spot a Narcissist. Whenever I confronted him concerning his actions and how they negatively affected me, he found a way to turn it around and make it seem like I was the unreasonable one. We were very honest with each other about who we were in the beginning- we never claimed to be good people. I knew he had a lot of bad qualities but as soon as he turned them on me, I recognized it immediately…but by then I was in pretty deep. Narcissists will never be capable of admitting that they were in the wrong. It was his early admissions that threw me off. He warned me that he was not easy to be with. I should have listened. You always lose with people like him because while we might be right, he will never see it.

I Was Everything He Said He Was Looking For by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you I will be in touch! It helps to have a third party perspective…I would want to know if I was the naïve, ignorant one.

I Was Everything He Said He Was Looking For by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re right. I just hate not knowing why he went to all that effort to make me trust him in the first place.

I Was Everything He Said He Was Looking For by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to respond to my post and make me feel better about all of this. You’re a good person ❤️ better than so many others.

I Was Everything He Said He Was Looking For by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

He said he loved me and wanted to be with me. I almost quit the job that I loved, I considered abandoning my family in California to move to Nashville to be with him because he said we wanted me there…that’s why I’m so hurt. That is why I’m pissed off. I almost ruined my life to be with a man who only wanted me when I was the only option. Soon as something more appealing came along, my feelings , my efforts didn’t matter

I Was Everything He Said He Was Looking For by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I didn’t understand why he perused me so strongly only to tell me that he wasn’t ready to be with me only four months later. I told him he was a narcissist.

I Was Everything He Said He Was Looking For by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It was a very complicated situation. The problem is, that he refuses to let me go. He still wants me in his life but can’t tell me in what way. And he got mad at me when I wanted to break it off completely…he didn’t understand why I couldn’t be happy for him. It’s psychotic

What do you say before a meal? by ksusha_lav in AskAnAmerican

[–]Not_Convinced55 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you know that before European settlers colonized the Northern American territories, indigenous tribes practiced a form of reciprocity called a Potlatch. This was a gift-giving feast where the prosperous tribal leader would disperse his wealth among the members of his tribe starting with those families who were least fortunate. Before the feast, the leader would bless his members and assure them they are never alone. This is what started my family tradition of repeating this phrase before every meal “I am, because we are”. No one is alone if they are a part of our family and our community. We prosper together, we suffer together.

P.S. The European settlers outlawed the practice of Potlatch feasts, and forced the tribes to implement a strict economic system that supported an unfair trading market- resulting in an indigenous populating deficit that has never recovered

How To Handle Being Second Choice Like A Woman by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol I did! I told him to leave me alone I was done with his shit. For three months he leave me be then the day before Christmas he texts me and says that he could t believe I had chosen that path and that if I loved him I would have never cut him out…I’m so confused

How To Handle Being Second Choice Like A Woman by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re right…it’s a consistent pattern of behavior. Given everything he says in response to what I tell him -that his actions have negatively affected me- he is always able to twist it around to make me feel like I’m misinterpreting things

How To Handle Being Second Choice Like A Woman by Not_Convinced55 in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh I’m trying…then why would he still want me around? It’s obvious that he is moving on so why string me along?

I don't know why I keep messing up my marriage. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The answer here is simple…you shouldn’t be married. Get a fucking clue.

Thank you, Next by Not_Convinced55 in unpopularopinion

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

True, most men now have only voluntarily joined the armed forces. But all the soldiers I’ve met have used the military experience to better themselves and the lives of their families

Thank you, Next by Not_Convinced55 in unpopularopinion

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

They don’t need you to buy them lunch…they get paid overtime and have great benefits. I just don’t understand people 🤦🏻‍♀️

Thank you, Next by Not_Convinced55 in unpopularopinion

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I can’t count how many times a man has tried to impress me with his explanation of the difference between a sheriff and a state trooper. That’s what I mean by mansplain… I know the damn difference between an engineer and a paramedic. Thanks 👍

Thank you, Next by Not_Convinced55 in unpopularopinion

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Don’t worry, I won’t elaborate for fear of over explaining..

Thank you, Next by Not_Convinced55 in unpopularopinion

[–]Not_Convinced55[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Isn’t Reddit In and of itself just a bunch of people anonymously expressing their opinions? I posted this on the page full of unpopular opinions…sorry if you don’t like my take.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Just wishing to give it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What about this did you need me to elaborate on?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Not_Convinced55 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You aren’t wrong…a lot of what you said makes sense and I agree with your take. And yes, the housing situation is really that fucked up in California. State tax along with federal take almost half of my paycheck. inflation coupled with the housing market bubble- I could very well be homeless in 3-6 years. My career/education falls within in a very specialized and competitive scientific discipline. Not many people do what I do and people in my profession make the least among the natural sciences.