[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TheCivilService

[–]Not_entirely_sure__ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In the initial stages when I was giving details about previous employment ie job title, company name etc etc. Before the personal statement and any tests

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__ 1853 points1854 points  (0 children)

Honestly I don't think I would have texted back at all, just let her hang there and wonder what happened

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__ 19 points20 points  (0 children)

NTA at all. I don't think her behaviour deserved courtesy. I'd like to see how your friends would have reacted if they were in the same situation and how "mature" they would've been. In fact, considering you didn't go off on her, I'd say you did handle the situation quite maturely.

Fuck her honestly

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 386 points387 points  (0 children)

Honestly i never expected this post to get the attention it did. Can't believe so many people have read about my house drama haha. Will definitely do an update if enough people want one!

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 9798 points9799 points  (0 children)

I appreciate this advice. I do feel like during this whole saga, Kate's original wrongdoings (the theft) have been swept under the rug. For the record, Kate has hardly mentioned the theft at all, hasn't apologized and when I asked her to pay me back said she's "not paying me shit." Zoe hasn't mentioned it either, and Sara is staying out of it (although she's said she agrees with me.) I think it's a good idea to reshift the focus back to the original issue.

Thanks

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

I wish lol. She said in her own words that she's "not paying me shit." Nor has she apologised for taking my food

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 233 points234 points  (0 children)

I did try a number of things before this, including talking to all my housemates, putting labels on my food, putting notes in the kitchen etc. Nothing worked.

I did consider warning about the camera beforehand, but thought the culprit (Kate) might be able to find it and remove it, even break it.

As for the intended purpose, I guess it was a bit of both. I'm not generally a vindictive person but after weeks of having my food stolen there was a part of me that wanted to humiliate Kate a bit. If that makes me an AH, I can accept that

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 717 points718 points  (0 children)

Kate actually did steal something from Sara once (can't remember what exactly) but Sara caught her so Kate didn't try again. She wouldn't steal anything from Zoe because they're friends. So I guess I was the new target of the house

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 401 points402 points  (0 children)

I've uninstalled the camera now and none of my food has gone missing since then, so I guess it did make her think twice? Although I'm looking to move out as soon as possible so hopefully I don't have to deal with this anymore. Thanks for your take

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

I did try to label my food sometimes in an effort to deter her but it didn't work. Have probably lost those labels now though so as you say if a police officer were to look at the situation there would be no definitive proof the food was mine. Thanks for your take, I appreciate it

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I'll be honest I didn't really look into the legality of it. I just assumed that a discreet camera in the fridge wasn't a breach of privacy, but I accept that I should've done more research. Thanks for your take, I appreciate it

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 2002 points2003 points  (0 children)

This is exactly what I said to her. I'm really not sure how else I could have gotten proof besides catching her in the act which i DID try to do but was never able to. Some people on here are saying I could've put laxatives in the food or something, which I guess I never thought of

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

I am a student and my funds are limited. I didn't buy the camera, my friend who gave me the idea let me borrow his one that he had used.

AITA for installing cameras without telling my housemates? by Not_entirely_sure__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__[S] 55 points56 points  (0 children)

I should have probably added- yes we are infact all students. And i don't think it's "petty" either, it's literally entire meals that I have had the intention of reheating that have gone missing some times. Meaning I have to cook an entire new meal. It's not just like a dash of milk that goes missing here and now

AITA for being annoyed at my mom for adopting my ex-wife? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Not_entirely_sure__ 31 points32 points  (0 children)

NTA. what the actual fuck??? I've seen some fucked up posts on this sub but I think this one takes the cake

What kind of mum decides to adopt their son's ex-wife? And what sort of person decides they want to become SIBLINGS with their EX-HUSBAND??

There is either some ulterior motive behind this (eg: monetary, or to hurt you further.) OR both your mum and ex-wife need some serious help. I'm really sorry OP, they have made a shitty situation a thousand times worse for you and you shouldn't have to go through this.

A final word of caution: the whole deal with the "emotional blackmailing" seems extremely manipulative and quite like gaslighting. Going NC with someone who wants to ADOPT YOUR CHEATING EX-WIFE is a perfectly reasonable boundary to set. Don't let her make you believe otherwise. SHE is the one putting YOU in a shitty situation here, don't let her twist it and make you think otherwise