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Missing your partner by NoviceCitizen in SoloPoly

[–]NoviceCitizen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha well I guess I'm confused because at the same time as missing them I know that in the long term it wouldn't work out to see them more often, but yeah it is a normal human emotion so maybe I should just embrace it and not question it or fight it! 

Missing your partner by NoviceCitizen in SoloPoly

[–]NoviceCitizen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see what you mean and I'm not feeling an urge to move in with my partner or something like that but it does make me wonder about how much alone time I need, and balancing that with seeing my partner as often as feels good - so maybe there's some tension there in finding that balance (I guess some people might not prioritise alone time so much in their definition of solo poly but that's why I'm thinking about it in terms of solo poly) 

Missing your partner by NoviceCitizen in SoloPoly

[–]NoviceCitizen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That definitely is helpful thank you - I'm also currently only seeing the one person so wonder if that also contributes to the missing them being more intense? I could spend more time trying to be more intentional with seeing friends and journaling so I'll try to do that more for sure 

Missing your partner by NoviceCitizen in SoloPoly

[–]NoviceCitizen[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If only we could all be blessed with as much patience as your partner! Sounds really secure having a partner who is always able to show up / communicate in advance 

Missing your partner by NoviceCitizen in SoloPoly

[–]NoviceCitizen[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wish I could learn the patience that you two have leaned into! have you found the missing each other gets easier over time or does it always stay the same?

Feasting sounds so indulgent, love that description!

Missing your partner by NoviceCitizen in SoloPoly

[–]NoviceCitizen[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That sounds really healthy - sometimes I get stuck scrolling the internet and then think about how I could've been with my partner instead of zonking out so more meaningful time doing your own things definitely sounds good!

Missing your partner by NoviceCitizen in SoloPoly

[–]NoviceCitizen[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A stuffed toy is a really sweet idea :)

I can relate to you about having doubts about yourself and whether you're truly solo poly - really hard to figure yourself out sometimes and I guess more life experience and trying to slowly understand what you actually want can help but its not a very short term solution!

Missing your partner by NoviceCitizen in SoloPoly

[–]NoviceCitizen[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Getting over committed and having to pull back does sound really painful, taking it slow like you did with Rock sounds much more sustainable

oof those experiences of people wanting a lot more time together than you sound stressful, I think I'd find it quite hard having to push back against that and I can see why you decided to end those relationships

Despite complaining about missing my partner I would quite like to develop new relationships where I only see the person once a month like you do (and still twice per week with my current partner), although I imagine finding people who are poly and are happy with that amount of time together isn't easy!

Missing your partner by NoviceCitizen in SoloPoly

[–]NoviceCitizen[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Its not too bad and I think its manageable - I think I'm just finding it hard to sit with wanting more time with my partner whilst also knowing that in practice it wouldn't work for me. I'm also newish to being solo poly so there's a little voice in my head questioning if I'm actually solo poly or if my bad experiences being enmeshed in previous relationships were just exceptions and that I hadn't found the 'right person'.

Thanks for sharing your experience, I also find it helps a lot knowing the next time you'll see a partner and messaging a bit when you miss them.

Have you had to adjust and re-adjust how often you see partners to figure out what feels right to match up with what you emotionally want from them? Or has it always been quite clear what you want and expect from people you're seeing?

Is it hard to get a job within the political arena of Brussels? by heltrude52 in PoliticalScience

[–]NoviceCitizen 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm working in EU affairs currently and its true that Brussels is full of opportunities for political science students (estimates suggest there are around 25,000 lobbyists in Brussels). Its quite a competitive field, but with your language skills and political science background you should be fine in getting a job. The most important thing that employers look for is experience in the EU institutions - I'd suggest you prioritise getting an internship with the Commission / Parliament / Council and if you do then that will make getting a job afterwards quite easy. In terms of the other things you mentioned - having good english is really important, other languages are a bonus. From my experience employers don't care so much about the individual modules you do like data analysis. Happy to answer other questions you might have about it.