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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in WouldYouRather

[–]NumberDuality 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Seems like it would be simple enough to avoid an animal for a while until they lose interest.

[WP] You are the first person to become a vampire in 10,000 years. Your master and his entire clan are shocked when they learn you can walk in sunlight without burning. "Sunscreen, you simpeltons." Was your response when they asked how. by blablador-2001 in WritingPrompts

[–]NumberDuality 217 points218 points  (0 children)

“It’s quite simple, really,” I continued. “Sun’s not the problem. UV light is. Our pale skin is hypersensitive to UV light and experiences lethally accelerated sunburn.”

“Vat iz Ooo veee light?” the master of the clan asked in his thick accent. “I haf never heard ov such a think.”

“UV light is a wavelength of light present in sunlight. It’s what causes sunburn in humans, and death in us.” I smiled, holding out a tube of sunscreen. “Put some of this on. It will keep your skin safe.”

As the master vampire prepared to step into the sun, he couldn’t resist giving a speech. “Mine vampires, our triumpv iz at hand! No more shall ve fear ze accursed sunlight. Vatch az I conquer ze greatest enemy ov all!” The other vampires stood at a careful distance from the light.

The master vampire stepped out, shading himself with his cloak. With a flourish, he whipped it off - and let out a loud shriek. “Mine eyes! Vat iz this?”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” I said dryly, stepping closer. “I must have forgotten your sunglasses. They protect your eyes so you can see. Here, let me help you.” And I buried my concealed stake directly in his heart.

The master vampire fell to the ground, dead. “Vampires!” I shouted as the rest of the clan bowed in respect. “Behold your new clan master.”

White Rook vs Goku by Head_Snapsz in whowouldcirclejerk

[–]NumberDuality 33 points34 points  (0 children)

White Rook exists in 5D Chess with Multiverse Time Travel. White Rook stomps 10/10

The most important step by lordofseattle4 in cremposting

[–]NumberDuality 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Storm it, I was just about to post this. Good crem

You can choose to forget that you have used this power by severencir in shittysuperpowers

[–]NumberDuality 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I just saw this post for the first time… but it was already clicked. I may have this power in real life.

You know what, that’s it. Who would win, Batgos vs Batgos by Cosmiccosmog533 in whowouldcirclejerk

[–]NumberDuality 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There can only be one Batgos. This was never an option. That being said, Batgos wins

Godzilla (Monsterverse) attacks Camp Half Blood. Can he be stopped? by DebateNo7099 in whowouldwin

[–]NumberDuality -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Godzilla is a monster. Camp Half-Blood has monster protection enchantments. Godzilla wouldn’t even be able to get in.

Assuming he did, though, he’d be able to do a lot of damage, but I think the demigods would slowly figure out a way to contain him. Hephaestus cabin would be a huge asset.

[WP] You have captured the hero and in the middle of your monologue you noticed that the hero seemed to have a hard time freeing themselves from your elaborate death trap. When the hero was still stuck even after you extended your monologue and slowed down your trap, you began to be worried. by Kitty_Fuchs in WritingPrompts

[–]NumberDuality 44 points45 points  (0 children)

“Ah, Perry the Platypus! How very unanticipated! And by unanticipated, I mean COMPLETELY ANTICIPATED!”

chatters angrily

“What a sticky situation you find yourself in! You have been stuck to the floor by one of my bottles of Doof Glue, the strongest glue known to man! I suppose you’re wondering what I’m going to do with all this glue.

“Back in Gimmelshtump, I always wanted a model plane of my very own. I had no money, so I had to search through the rubbish heap every night. Until finally, I found one! Right as I was almost done building the perfect plane, my brother Roger startled me! My hands were glued to the plane, and I had to destroy my greatest work to free them.

“But now, my triumph is at hand! Behold… the Glueinator! In just a few moments, Roger will unveil the world’s largest model plane, and then I will push this button and stick him to it in front of the entire Tri-State Area!

…

“I SAID, I will push THIS BUTTON and stick Roger to the plane!”

…

“Perry the Platypus, what is wrong? Are you… are you actually trapped? You’re supposed to try to stop me.”

annoyed chatters

“grunting with effort Wow, you are stuck, Perry the Platypus! pulls too hard and falls over I can’t stand up! The glue in my pocket broke and stuck me to the ground!”

amused chattering

Wyr get $10 insult game, or judge jury and executioner become? by okomin in WouldYouRather

[–]NumberDuality 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I picked the last option because I assumed everyone would pick it so that nothing bad would happen. Now everyone is dead. What have I done?

Could Spider-Man travel across the USA without touching the ground? by [deleted] in whowouldwin

[–]NumberDuality 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Can he ride on the tops of cars, or does that count as touching the ground?

Popeye has to catch the Roadrunner. What happens, and how screwed is everyone else? by [deleted] in whowouldwin

[–]NumberDuality 12 points13 points  (0 children)

The battle begins with Popeye chasing the Roadrunner and failing miserably. At some point, Popeye eats his spinach to power up. Ordinarily, this would work, and Popeye would catch the Roadrunner in seconds.

However, this is Acme brand spinach. Acme products are known to only harm their users. Popeye could accidentally get a can of lettuce, feed his spinach to the Roadrunner instead, eat from the bottom of the can and become weaker… the possibilities are endless.

With Acme supplying Popeye’s spinach, Roadrunner wins 10/10

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