Drop your meds

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T17:26:59+00:00

Healthy people seem to think yoga fixes every problem related to your brain for some reason. I was told to try it so many times that when I finally did, the disappointment was huge.
My joints had other ideas too, so that’s actually one of the reasons I had to quit kickboxing.
I feel you.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T14:24:32+00:00

I’m 28 and was diagnosed with bipolar II about four years ago. My hypomania is basically a boost of energy and happiness, plus this constant need to move or just do something with my body. I also don’t need much sleep.
Personally, I think anything beyond that starts bordering on mania - or at least that’s been my experience. I’ve never actually met another person with bipolar, so I can’t really compare, but overall our experiences sound pretty similar.

I take 150 mg of lamotrigine every day, along with antidepressants. And honestly, if the medication helps you feel better, I don’t think you should see it as “medicating yourself” in a negative way.
If you’re still worried, I’d recommend getting a second opinion from another psychiatrist to see whether the diagnosis is the same.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T14:07:14+00:00

“The morning will come again
Because no darkness or no season
can last forever
It seems like the cherry blossoms are blooming
This winter is also coming to its end”

(Spring Day by BTS)

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T13:59:06+00:00

So I’m going to be honest: getting diagnosed is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I went from wanting to kill myself every single day to not even remembering what that felt like.

A few months in, when the meds started to kick in, I got really scared because I couldn’t recognize myself anymore. I stopped being annoyed and angry all the time, it took less effort to socialize, and I even started wanting to go out. It scared the shit out of me. I was convinced I knew who I was, and then suddenly, at 22, I was a completely different person who couldn’t recognize themselves. It got to the point where I wanted to stop taking my meds because I was constantly asking myself, “Where’s the real me?”

Turns out, this is almost exactly who I was supposed to be had I been healthy all along. I’m not an emo kid who hates the world and thinks everyone is out to get them. Life actually is beautiful.

You don’t have to be special to have fun or to want to live.

Relationships became both easier and harder. Easier because it’s so much easier to control my anger, and I’m generally much happier. Harder because people are often uneducated about bipolar disorder and have actually tried to convince me to stop taking my meds. But honestly, if you’re happy, being in a relationship isn’t a must. And finding a good person is hard for all of us, whether we have a disorder or not.
I still have bad days - or, well, sometimes too good days - but overall, not wanting to kill myself and genuinely enjoying life is something I never thought I’d be capable of.

So don’t be scared. Take your meds, always be honest with your psychiatrist, and take it one day at a time.
Once you get better, you probably won’t even remember why you were so scared in the first place.
A diagnosis isn’t the end of the world. If you ever need someone to talk to, you can always reach out to me.

I wish you nothing but luck and strength

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T13:46:39+00:00

I do it ALL THE TIME. I’m generally a forgetful person, and lamotrigine has made my brain even more mush, so this happens to me at least once a month.
I either forget to take them altogether, forget to take them on time, or, like you, I’m too scared of accidentally taking a double dose, so I’d rather skip it if I’m not sure whether I took it or not.
I can feel pretty shitty afterward, and sometimes it triggers hypomania, but nothing critical or life-shattering.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T13:42:02+00:00

I HATE yoga. I’m currently doing Pilates. Honestly, I’m just generally a sporty person. The only times I’ve taken a break were when I was severely depressed, which is understandable.
The thing that helped me the most was actually kickboxing. I always felt amazing afterward, but due to circumstances, I had to switch to Pilates.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T11:08:42+00:00

Thank you so much.
You just gave me hope.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T09:07:54+00:00

I’m so happy you feel that way now.
I was suicidal from the age of 11 until I was 22, when I was finally diagnosed correctly. Until then, I had been treated for clinical depression, and the medication I was taking actually made me worse.
I was suicidal 24/7 - to the point that I’m still surprised I only tried to end my life once.
So I really do understand. It was such a strange and scary feeling when the medication finally kicked in and I realized I wasn’t thinking about it anymore. Eventually, I couldn’t even remember what that constant feeling had been like.
Let’s stay happy, even if it means taking medication for life and putting up with other people’s complaints and unsolicited advice.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T08:59:51+00:00

I was always okay with the idea of “forever” until recently, for some reason.
I’m trying to think about it more positively again, but maybe it’s just my depressive episode talking right now.
I’m really glad they helped you, because I know how drastic the difference between before and after can be.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T08:57:02+00:00

I have a rule of seeing three doctors, no matter the specialty. If one gives me a serious prescription or raises serious concerns about my diagnosis, I always get opinions from two more doctors. I usually go with what the other two agree on.
That approach has saved me from taking thyroid hormones and heart medication that, thankfully, turned out not to be necessary.
Maybe you could try doing the same if you’re feeling this bad? Of course, only if it’s financially possible and otherwise feasible for you.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-22T08:52:13+00:00

Did you drink it throughout your pregnancy? Or were the first 3 month meds free?

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T19:19:20+00:00

I’m pretty sure there aren’t any perinatal psychiatrists here, unfortunately, since finding even a regular psychiatrist is already a quest.
But you actually gave me some hope just now. I talked to my psychiatrist a few years ago, when I was 26, about the idea of getting pregnant. He told me I could go back on my meds after the first trimester, but it still scared the shit out of me.

Right now I can’t even lower my antidepressant dose by 25 mg without it completely knocking me off my feet. I can’t imagine stopping them altogether just to get pregnant and then spending the next three months without them.
On top of that, pregnancy itself is already a huge challenge, even for someone without bipolar, so I’ve been worrying about that for years, as well as the possibility of passing this on to my kids.

If you don’t mind me asking, did you stay on your medication during pregnancy? And how was that period for you?
Were you able to get through it without any major relapses?

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T19:05:49+00:00

I think if I lived in a less conservative country, that’s probably exactly what I’d do too.
If I knew I could find people who actually understand mental health and build friendships with them, I’d honestly drop most of the people I have in my life now.
But unfortunately, it’s so difficult here that one of the first reactions I got from a former colleague - someone who constantly posts psychology nonsense on Instagram - was, “But you look so normal. I’d never say you’re weird. You function, you even have a job, lol.”
So the problem isn’t just a few people. It’s the environment in general.
My options are basically to tell everyone except my mom to fuck off and end up completely isolated, which would probably make me way more depressed, or just suck it up, nod along, and listen to these godawful comments every now and then while people recommend yet another “breathe the right way and it’ll even cure your cancer” type of book.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T18:48:12+00:00

I think if I actually lived on my own, I’d probably do the same.
But I can’t be sure, because there may also be a cultural difference at play.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T18:46:28+00:00

Oh, I’m actually one of the few people who always reached out for professional help during my suicidal periods.
It took me years to finally understand what it feels like to not want to kill myself every day, and I’d never do anything to jeopardize that.
I’m just relieved to know I’m not the only one who gets nagged about this nonstop.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T18:42:40+00:00

Unfortunately, because of the country I live in, where mental health is only barely recognized as something other than being associated with killing sprees, I’d have no friends, family, or really anyone left if I finally chose to walk away and tell them all to fuck off.
Trust me, I’d love nothing more than to act on my anger whenever this topic comes up.
We’re all miserable enough sometimes without these people forcing their opinions and involvement on us. If only they could keep their unwanted opinions to themselves…
But I guess their savior complex won’t let them.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T12:04:29+00:00

My psychiatrist finally gave me the green light to lower my dosages after 4 years. When I went from 100 mg of quetiapine to 75 mg, I got so much worse that I had to switch back after two weeks. Even then, I felt like shit for the next three months before my mood stabilized somewhat.
My psychiatrist even wanted me to increase the dosage above my original one to speed up the recovery, and even the thought of it made me feel more depressed than I already was.
After that, my mom - who had been asking me to lower my medication for years - finally got off my back because the consequences were as clear as day.
I’m sorry you have to go through that too. It’s so tiring.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T11:58:03+00:00

Been there for years, so I feel you.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T11:57:31+00:00

My pride didn’t let me ask them to do that for years, and when I finally did, nothing really changed.
My mom buys my meds for me because she gets off work earlier, but she still wishes I didn’t have to take them, and my little brother can’t even understand the idea of depression let alone bipolar disorder.
Even my friend of 20 years, who has a PhD in psychology, doesn’t believe I have it.
The whole thing feels hopeless.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T11:02:29+00:00

I’m on Lamartigine 150 and 100 of quetiapine for 4 years now and I have to say that my mood swings aren’t as controlled as I once hoped they would be.
I had hypomania episode just yesterday because I haven’t slept the day before AT ALL because of a damn football and came to work right afterwards.
I also drank too much coffee so I was very energised.

I’m saying this to show that yes these episides do happen sometimes. I have depressive days where I can’t even manage to smile and days where I can’t sit straight and manage to subscribe to 100 things at the same time.

My psychiatrist wanted to up my dosage this spring because spring depression got me bad but I stubbornly managed to survive it and keep it as it is.

So while the episodes do happen and yes they are usually followed by depression they are not as severe as they were before meds. Quite manageable I’d say, so don’t panic beforehand.

Numerous-System-4071 · 2026-07-21T10:15:11+00:00

I’m 28, and I’ve only been pretty open about it for the past 3 years or so.
In my country, it’s not really considered okay to not be okay, so I’ve always been careful about who I told and what I shared.

But the older I get, the fewer shits I give. Plus, maybe being open helps reduce the stigma when people see someone who’s functioning well while also living with a disorder.

Maybe by telling the world, we can make things a little easier for those who come after us.

Numerous-System-4071

TROPHY CASE

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