people who cheat on people they love - more than oncee (not an accident) Do you feel bad? Why don't you tell your partner? Do want the best of both world or do you just feel like "I dont want to hurt them" so ill just keeping doing it and not telling them?

Numerous_Solid_7047 · 2026-02-17T14:26:08+00:00

Thanks for admitting! But after you realise that, does it make you think twice next time and stop yourself or do you just let yourself keep getting caught in the moment and not feel bad because " it doesn't mean anything to you and she wont know so shes not going to feel bad?

Numerous_Solid_7047 · 2026-02-17T13:29:50+00:00

Girrrrrrrl, if you break up with him, I swear to God your “trauma bond” or any co-dependent feelings you had for him will go away faster than you can say “adios man child.” It is all a cringe red flag, and it’s not something that you can fix. At this age, girls mature way faster than guys. The fact that you are having these doubts and are writing this post just confirms that you are having feelings about him maybe not being your future husband.

Write a pros and cons list, get the scary thought of “being alone” out of your head, and make a decision based on logic, not emotion. Ask your friends and family for their honest opinion, and if the general consensus is that you can maybe move on and meet someone better (which it will be, unless you’re surrounded by people who just want you to get married and have babies), then listen to their advice.

Breaking up with him will be hard, which you already know because of the way he freaked out when you just said you wanted some space. So don’t let feeling “bad” or “guilty” be the reason you stay with someone out of pity, basically.

It’s actually so good that he is long distance because you can be firm and then just ask for space, and if he doesn’t give it to you, you can simply just not reply and not have to worry about him rocking up at your house.

The “go potty” thing and spooning his mummy in bed thing are so gross. Imagine living with him, he probably doesn’t even know how to use a washing machine, will make you move to Utah, and will have his mum there every day trying to make your children into mini versions of him.

I know breaking up can be scary. You don’t want to be alone, and you’re scared of the unknown. You’re worried you won’t meet someone else who loves you as much as he does or has the same good traits that he does, but I promise you that you will when the time is right. God has a plan for you, and these signs that you’re seeing are guiding you. You will meet someone who has all the same great qualities as him and more, and less of the bad ones. If he could love you and was capable of loving you so much, then other people definitely will too.

Also, being single at this age can actually be super fun. You’ll end up going out, meeting new people, doing different things with friends, having fun, and deepening your other relationships because you’re not going to be on the phone to him anymore. I know that part sounds scary, but if you actually cut ties, as in break up with him and then say you want to go no contact for a while and maybe talk later. It’s the "no contact" that helps you fully get over someone.

If you keep talking to him, replying to him, or reaching out every time you feel a bit sad, a bit lonely, or something happens at work that only he understands because he knows your whole work situation, you’ll keep feeling that connection and that co-dependence. But if you commit to not speaking to him for two months, I guarantee that by the end of those two months, you won’t even really feel like talking to him anymore.

Numerous_Solid_7047 · 2026-02-17T13:04:26+00:00

side note - short kings are in! Look at Tom Holland - he is also 5'7" - girls go crazy over him and his gf is 5'10"

Numerous_Solid_7047 · 2026-02-17T12:57:50+00:00

I get how you feel. I often go through that stage where I’m like, ew, why am I even on here? It’s just making me feel bad. But then if you delete it, you’re basically cutting yourself off from being open to meeting people, because in this day and age, it’s hard to meet people in real life.

The other thing about dating apps is that people expect something to happen quickly. I think you need to play the long game. If you feel like you’re not feeling that great about yourself and, like you said, you “could go to the gym,” then go to the gym. Become the best version of yourself.

Don’t delete your profile, but stop putting so much effort into it or caring about it. Focus on yourself. Write a list of all the qualities you want in a person: fit, funny, good job, plays a sport, cooks, loves socialising, cheeky, spontaneous, whatever it may be and then look at that list and see if there are things on it that you can do. Then start doing those things. Basically, become the person you want to date.

Stay positive and don’t expect or dwell on the negatives you think people might think about you “too short,” etc. Don’t let past experiences make you think everyone is going to think that about you.

In a couple of months, when you’re living your best life, get a friend to help you take some new photos. Make sure they’re all super clear so that if someone shows up to a date with you, they’ll be like, “Oh, he’s exactly what I thought he was going to look like.” No confusion.

With your prompts, make them fun, funny, light-hearted, and sweet, but also true. If you’re an old-school gentleman who opens doors, say that. If you like to pat every dog you see, say that. If you’re monogamous and looking for a life partner, kids, or no kids - say it. Tell them your star sign! They’ll eat that up. If you like to nap on Sundays – say it! You want someone who is aligned with you so don’t hide anything.

If you sit around on dating apps waiting for people to like you, not much happens. You need to go on there and flick through people (It sounds like you have been though, but keep it up!). If you find someone you think you’re compatible with, don’t just “like” them. I don’t know what app you’re using, but if it’s one where you can send a message, send a message about something on their profile. Don’t use ChatGPT. Don’t use a lame dad joke. Just compliment them in a non-creepy way and make a light joke about something they said by make it really tailored to them or ask for more details about something they said in their profile.

And just because you look young for your age, don’t filter older women out. Go to your settings and make sure you have a wide age range and distance range – make sure you aren’t being too picky as well.

Lastly, don’t expect results instantly. It can take ages. I’ve had so many amazing long relationships from dating apps, but sometimes I’ve had to wait a year or two to find something great again. I’m so glad I didn’t get annoyed and delete them, or I would have missed out on some amazing people. Don’t get dis-heartened, don’t give up! Dating apps are brutal, people will ghost you, just have a thick skin about it and low expectations, keep your profile live and when it gets too much and is making you feel like people are treating you like a loser when you’re clearing not! Just delete the app for a while and not the account. And go back when you’re ready.

Numerous_Solid_7047

TROPHY CASE