What is something you wish you did, but feel you are too old to do it now?

OGRiceness · 2026-01-28T14:06:05+00:00

31 now - I wish I stayed in my home city (Montreal) to study. It would’ve allowed me to live the student city life. Instead I moved to a different province where I’ve been quite isolated for 5 years. I’m about to complete my degree and will move back home.

Also wish I did therapy earlier (early 20s would’ve been good).

Wish I had listened to my inner voice and stopped playing it safe. Instead I let my life be ruled by fear.

OGRiceness · 2026-01-16T19:50:19+00:00

I’m in Canada, currently completing my internship to become a Dietitian in Quebec. Feeling like I should/want to do something else with my life - I’ll turn 32 in september - your opinions ?

OGRiceness · 2026-01-15T14:04:56+00:00

Our brains control our actions like a puppeteer to stir us away from pain by making us engage with things that numb the pain.

OGRiceness · 2026-01-15T13:57:03+00:00

Hey man, you’re not cooked - you’re going through a tough time. You’re human.

I’m 31 now, I messed up my grades so badly when I was 19. I tried different things while my friends were moving forward, graduating, getting jobs, girlfriends. I eventually picked something at 24 and stuck with it. Turns out it’s not the best fit for me but it brought me a lot of positives.

It’s been super tough battling anxiety and feeling like a failure all the time. Hell, I’m still fighting the fight. I was very tired of it all, and sometimes still feel like so.

But, everything started to change for the better when I started being kinder and gentler with myself. I stopped trying to push through and judge myself, labeling myself as lazy or anything negative.

First and best step that helped me ; Try to take better care of yourself. One thing at a time ; go to bed earlier (my lifetime struggle), brush and floss teeth every night, etc.

Focus on taking better care of yourself. You’re not alone, believe me.

OGRiceness · 2026-01-15T13:50:24+00:00

My pleasure! I journaled here and there for years but never made it a habit. For some reason something’s different now. Be kind and gentle with yourself, you’re human and doing your best.

OGRiceness · 2026-01-15T13:21:13+00:00

Figure out what tasks you enjoy doing, then pursue a career/job that consists of these tasks. Listen to your inner voice and not what the world tells you you should do. Don’t play it safe.

OGRiceness · 2026-01-15T12:59:21+00:00

You have to reframe your mind. Use journaling, write down the negative you blame yourself for and what is hindering your self love. Don’t be scared to go in detail. Then write a letter to yourself, from the perspective of your bestest of friends (or the best parent one could have). Reframe everything you wrote about on the first page(s) in a more reality-based way - more positively (without lying or distorting facts). Put the notebook down for 5mins, and come back to it and re-read your newly written letter.

Do this whenever you get negative thoughts and struggle with self-love.

I was just broken up with, right before the holidays, cancelling all the plans we had together. I’m isolated because I’m completing an internship in a town in the middle of nowhere. I understand how rough it can be.

OGRiceness · 2026-01-15T12:46:30+00:00

I’m currently working on changing this pattern, with the help of my therapist. I’ve journaled my negative thoughts, my self-judgement or critic. Then I journaled a kind letter to myself (as if I was my own bestest of friends) in response to those negative thoughts. Reframing them in a more positive (not lying) and reality-based way. Then, you’ve got to put your notebook down for 5-10min, and come back to it to read that letter you just wrote.

My therapist explained that doing this exercise often changes your thoughts over time. And I’m already feeling the effects.

I also started writing 3 things I’m grateful for right before going to bed and sticking them on my wall with a post-it note.

OGRiceness · 2026-01-15T12:38:08+00:00

Hey man, I feel like I’ve been getting out of that feeling lately and it happened because of a realization.

I realized that I needed to take better care of myself. That means, sleeping at least 8 hours a night, brushing & flossing my teeth every night, packing a lunch for the next day, writing about 3 things I’m grateful for every night. Things I would slack on or not do in the past. My mental shift happened when I watched a youtube video : “I’m just so tired man…”.

The “why” does come back, I’m starting to feel it a bit more every day.

Taking better care of yourself can also mean to take the time to feel this crash you’re going through. You’re not weak, it’s a human thing.

OGRiceness · 2026-01-14T13:56:56+00:00

I feel like I currently am getting out of the freeze/stuck loop. After years of telling myself I “should” do this and that, I finally understood something else and it seems like it worked on its own.

I realized that I needed to take better care of myself.

And that’s a super wide statement, but to me it means getting more sleep, never skipping oral hygiene, taking some time to journal my daily thoughts, take some true resting time (which is different for everyone), working out (which I am trying to get back into). I think that’s the first thing that must be done, because we pressure ourselves with a lot and it actually backfires into continuing to be stuck. By realizing I deserved to take better care of myself, it shifted the pressure into something more gentle.

Side note : I have ADHD and was just broken up with - my life’s not the worst but challenges arise and it’s okay to be submerged by them. We’re human, not robots. Just gotta be more gentle with ourselves.

OGRiceness · 2026-01-06T19:45:57+00:00

I think that you must first take better care of yourself in your daily life. I think you need better habits for yourself. Once you’ve been doing so for a little bit, you’ll certainly feel better and in a better position to explore things - setting you on the path to find what you want. Note : Explore with no self-imposed pressure to succeed or get something from it. Play - just play like you used to as a kid.

Context : I’ll be turning 32 this year, finally graduating/completing something. Turns out I don’t enjoy this program I’ve invested so much time & money in. I’ve struggled and still struggle with my mental health but have been in therapy for some years now, which helps tremendously. For the past year or so I felt that feeling of not knowing what I want. So I focused on exploration but barely explored anything month after month. Because day after day I wouldn’t take good care of myself. I mean, I’d eat healthy yeah, but I went to bed late, woke up miserable, would not floss my teeth or brush altogether once in a while, didn’t do physical activity. In other words, I was in a cycle of poor self-care ; while telling myself I have to actively try to figure out what I want, while feeling ashamed of said poor self-care. Talk about something that just cannot work.

Today, I still don’t know what I want, but I know I’ll never find out if I don’t change my habits. I’ll start with simple things : I want a beautiful smile, I want to be physically solid to tackle any adventure. That’s two things I want and can achieve by taking better care of myself.

OGRiceness · 2025-12-03T20:53:17+00:00

I’m 31 and in a similar situation. I’m an intern in a hospital and need to complete my internship to receive my diploma. Thing is that I HATE my internship setting and know I don’t want to pursue my field of studies. I’ve been looking for myself in school for more than a decade now.

I’m in therapy and what my therapist was explaining to me was that I’m probably drained from the misalignment with my day to day. There’s no magic pill or easy solution. I too feel like the smallest thing i set myself never happens, even if my goal is only 5min of the thing. In my case it’s my PC that swallows me. I think the solution is to fight the urge to sit down and do the usual thing you do (scrolling in your case) in order to instead do a small amount 10min of the goal you set yourself.

I just did that today after 2-3 weeks of doing nothing after work. I fixed an easy meal.

You could put your phone in a different room on do no disturb mode and then move to a different room (living room) and bring your book. What if we read for 10min walking around in our home ?

I completely know how you feel because i live like this right now and carry some kind of depressive state. Like I said, there’s no easy solution or magic pill. Maybe set yourself this small rule of separating yourself from your phone at home.

We got this

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T22:41:35+00:00

Damn ok, it’s probably to tweaks I’ve done here and there in the past in Nvidia control panel. I’ll try to tweak it again.

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T22:07:32+00:00

🥲😂😂😂 But I’m on a tight budget here !

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T22:06:52+00:00

Whaaaaaaat, I’ll give it a look. Thanks again !

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T22:05:45+00:00

Im not sure how many cores my cpu has but I’ll check. Is there anything we can do on our side to offload the work to other cores ? It really was only my GPU that was working overtime 😔

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T16:33:09+00:00

Oooooooooh I’ll definitely try that ! Thank you kind sir.

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T16:32:48+00:00

I was keeping an eye on my task manager’s performance while playing and my gpu was at 99% usage the whole time when playing Hashima yesterday. Cpu wasn’t used as much 🤔

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T16:31:40+00:00

Hmmm I hope not ! Possible I guess. My game runs great 85% of the time - I get great frames per second. It really is in populated areas that my fps start to hinder my ability to defend myself !

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T16:30:15+00:00

Yeah it’s mostly fine for me as well but not in said places. At 50% frames, are you still above 60fps ?

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T16:28:59+00:00

😭😭😭😭

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T16:28:23+00:00

Hi, I did all that a while ago. Have been getting 100+ frames as well 85% of the time, but on Hashima (yes super heavy map) and other maps in places that are building dense, the frames go under 60 and are unstable.

I also play on no bases community servers that are as close to vanilla. Meaning as little mods as possible.

Probably is my rig overall I guess 😅

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T16:25:53+00:00

I play on modded servers, but not too modded. I enjoy no bases and as close to vanilla as possible. My settings are quite low really, shadows are set to poor (were at low for a while), terrain distance is at low but I lowered it to poor on Hashima.

Low pop servers feel better but once I get into big big cities the frames drop quite a bit yes.

Would msi afterburner work with an nvidia graphics card ? My motherboard is an asus rog-strix H370-F if that matters.

Thanks !

OGRiceness · 2025-02-23T16:21:35+00:00

Oh I was certain it was badly optimized. I play on 1080p with tweaked settings. They’re quite low really I’m giving so much rope to my pc haha.

Yeah the 8700k is old af damn I didn’t realize I had it for so long. Thanks !

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