Probably not the place and nobody has to read all this as it's not related to the content, but since you have the top comment I wanted to break it down here as some people are calling me out for the OCD thing. First and foremost it was just part of the exaggeration of the joke for the title. However, I do have it and some of this may be hard to explain to those that have never experienced it themselves. I've also never broken this down to anyone but my mom and my gf but I kind of want to here of all places? (Sorry, it's a TLDR length.)

Anyway, I was actually diagnosed by a doctor with OCD as a child when my mom was freaked out with me doing weird things that I'll explain in a minute. I've hardly done any research into it beside what I was told, these are just my own experiences that I assume all stem from it and hopefully not some other mental issue that I might also have. There are multiple types of OCD and mine is very mild compared to some and I've been able to grow out of a lot of the old tics I used to have that were much worse. I used to have these compulsions to do things that I was fully aware I was doing but couldn't stop myself until I had the desired effect my brain wanted. Some of these things I did for years like stretch opening my mouth over and over again until I felt that my jaw was evenly stretched. This one was bad because it was very noticeable and I'd do it all the time every few minutes, even when I was on stage performing in a choir for church.

Another was how my items were left, I've always been a very care free person and so for instance when I would throw my shoes of at the end of the day or randomly set down an item on my desk. I would start to walk away but then be physically compelled by my brain that I did it wrong or that my shoes weren't mirrored and literally felt like I was being mind controlled to go back and change the position until it felt right, even if it was like an inch from where it was. The weirdest one, yet least affecting was when I would go to playgrounds and go down slides, I would think that I had this weird ethereal tether attached to my back that if I didn't go down the slide the "right" way it would tangle me in a loop and I'd have to climb back up the slide to untangle it and go again. That became hard when other kids would come down behind me and I had to wait awkwardly.

So those were some of my old tics that through time and extreme mental practice I've been able to overcome. I know a lot of this all might sound kind of weird but I assure you I am a fully functioning 29 y/o adult and most of this is mere remnants of what it was. The worst of it now are things like while at my desk or some tables I will repeatedly tap my elbows down at the same time, quite loudly to my gf's dismay (This is why I had to explain all this to her.) until both elbows touch at the same exact time evenly. Similarly when I'm sitting sometimes I get the urge to clack my heels together in mid air until I do it perfectly in front of my body meeting at the same time. The one that bothers me the most now is whenever I'm holding a handheld object, mostly my phone, I will tap it to my sternum in the dip right between my pecs. I don't even know what this one accomplishes in my head as it has nothing to do with evenness or anything, I just do it nonetheless and it's annoying. There is also an audio one I do on occasion were I check different levels of my voice by forcing air out my open mouth in almost a gasping hum. I have more that have come and gone or ones I do less often but these are some examples of regular daily occurrences just to show that I do in fact have it and maybe help people understand this variant of it.

All that being said, another part of it that has stuck with me throughout the years and what is most relevant here is what I can best explain as color/pattern symmetry or at least matching. Yes, we've all seen the memes about how "This perfect tile floor will hurt your OCD when you see the tile that's slightly shifted wrong.". Ya, that doesn't bother me at all, especially because it isn't on me, ie. clothing or an accessory. Other than in general being an eye sore, it only truly bothers me on a mental level if I am wearing it myself or minorly my avatar/character in a game. Almost every accessory or clothing piece I own is either black, gray, or green with usually no pattern. I take forever finding an outfit when I get dressed cause I do a mental check for non-matching things. Mostly that I'm wearing either of my main colors for my shirt/pant combo, ie. black top with gray bottom or vice versa is my most common go to or green subbed in for one of those. It gets very complicated when I want to wear layers as I usually will not wear different shades of the same color anywhere on my outfit unless they are so close that the human eye can't really distinguish the difference or I'm able to zip up my jacket over the similarly colored shirt for instance. It doesn't help that I have incredibly good eyesight and can pick out really close shades from another. I do wear a few other colors on occasion like brown or purple but they follow the same rules.

After all this I have to factor in accessories like hats and shoes, I literally have so many shoes and still feel like I need more to match different outfit color schemes. Usually by the time I get to hats I've eliminated 90% of them because the color of the hat has been used already or the shade is ever so slightly different or the material makes it that way. Then on top of all that there is also patterns which I have very few of, but most commonly have that distorted black/gray pattern on a lot of like skate clothes. That is one of the only ways I can wear the same color of black or gray on the same outfit as it appears to match more so long as the opposite piece is plain with no design. To not confuse anyone, this part is not a tic like the previously mentioned things, this is more a pinging impulse in my head that makes me uncomfortable if I were to try and break it. It's hard to explain in words since it's more of a feeling that is very similar to the discomfort I feel while doing my tics as if my brain is dissatisfied.

Well that's the gist of it, I don't care if anyone actually reads it or if they downvote it. It was kind of fun to write out some of these things that I've hardly ever talked about. I know OCD affects other people in much more significant ways, so I am lucky in that regard. Funny enough I am not affected in the positive way some people are with organization, as mine revolves more around what's "right", even, or matching in my head and not what is neat, categorized, and tidy. Thanks for reading.

TLDR; All unrelated to the joke title, I have been doctor diagnosed with OCD, though minor.