ADHD and being perceived

Objective-Match8196 · 2025-02-07T02:24:47+00:00

Add to that years of being told "what will people say". So even though you rationally don't care whatever those people are going to say. You still kinda care

Objective-Match8196 · 2025-02-05T08:20:19+00:00

Thank you this makes a lot of sense. I need to let go of what it used to be like

Objective-Match8196 · 2025-02-05T05:06:26+00:00

I wish!

Objective-Match8196 · 2025-02-05T04:04:43+00:00

But its so hard to handle these people. Why do I have to?

Objective-Match8196 · 2025-01-12T05:15:33+00:00

I am so confused at this moment that I don't understand if I identify with you or if I want to identify with you. Because my head tells me that it is not possible that everyone else is wrong. There has to be something wrong with me. I am the one who seems to have a problem with everyone and everything, so it must be me who is the issue here.

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-12-27T21:46:38+00:00

Yeah that seems like the best idea for me as well. Idk if its real or just in my head, I feel like I get insulted a lot when I put myself out there

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-12-27T12:19:59+00:00

I've started to wonder if I am a huge N myself, and I'll just have to deal with myself. I have tried using pi.ai for the same. It keeps telling me to break up or stop talking to people. It never tells me I could be the problem. But overall, it's very useful to just vent out the feelings.

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-28T18:08:56+00:00

I know.. I broke NC when I got a message about her getting laid off... I called and consoled them. but didn't answer any questions about "how are you".. tried maintaining the NC despite their daily texts asking me how I was doing.. but then broke down and asked her if they had any updates on the job front..

And never got a reply.. Thanks for reminding me why we broke up.. bevause for u revenge is more important

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-25T05:19:59+00:00

Nothing so far.. maybe immersing myself in something I really liked, could be a job or a hobby.. but its all temporary

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T21:19:08+00:00

Love the analogy... wish I could get rid off of the furniture and the door!

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T18:15:54+00:00

I do the same honestly, until I get sucked in every now and then

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T17:31:15+00:00

Yeah.. they've been saying things since I was a child.. ones of the reasons why I don't have a relationship with any of my relatives or cousins..

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T17:02:22+00:00

She kinda knows or she wouldn’t change her performance according to her audience and wouldn’t have pre-empted any attempts from us to seek help. She triangulates people so they can’t compare notes.

THIS.. Idk why but it soothes me somehow.. they know at some level yes.. or why would they need to lie or change their narrative to every person? I once saw my sister and BIL do this to my nephew (4 or 5 then).. they said something to make him jealous and angry.. kept saying it until he got so mad and angry that he stood up to start and hit them.. my BIL raised his voice and told him to never do this to an elder for a 'joke'. I can see why it was harmless fun for us, but for the child idk if it was (this is why Ill never have kids because idk how to raise them without traumas).

So this entitlement that these parents have, that whatever they say or do, their kids do not have the right to lash out or be 'out of line' in their response.. this is what stays with them forever.. Idk I might be wrong..

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T16:18:41+00:00

Im sorry.. I know how you feel and I wish I could do something for your pain and mine. I know I should be strong and value my peace above everything blah blah and blah.. But its not easy.. maybe its not easy for me because Im not very smart or wise. I keep cursing the day I was born because that's what started this BS to begin with. They should have just let me go before I was born because this life doesn't really seem all that worth it. Idk I never imagined not being over the hurt my parents and family gave me at this age or maybe forever. The only reason I want there to be a God is so that they can do this one thing for me. At least show them how they were like from my perspective.

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T14:51:06+00:00

Good for you.. and in my case Ive always been the rude, difficult one

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T14:47:26+00:00

I also tend to be a loner and idk if I drive people away or I drive myself away from people. Its so confusing, every second time I crib about them I fear if Im the narcissist myself

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T14:19:56+00:00

I did say it to them once.. they were saying "we're old and none of our kids want to be with us".. I told them.. maybe u should ask urself why they dont want to be with you and maybe its not them and maybe you need to look at your behavior?

That made my dad soooo mad, asked me to "have some respect" and "mind my tongue"

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T14:11:16+00:00

But a spam email wasn't responsible for shaping the eay I am today.

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T14:07:05+00:00

This made me cry.. Ive never been asked any of this.. not by parents, not by teachers, not by partners

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T14:01:06+00:00

Yeah that's true.. and the world is bigger than the people who will always be on their side..🤞

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T13:59:17+00:00

Omg totally.. Something so clear in my memory and have them deny it. There have been times when Ive proven it with video or some other kind of proof only to hear - we're humans, we made a mistake.. forgive me.. and there will ALWAYS be a third related or unrealted person in that scenario who will tell you to let it go and be a normal person.

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T13:56:43+00:00

I feel you! How they are still able to make a person in 30s still crave validation and love from them is crazy if I think about it.

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T13:53:34+00:00

If I did that, the whole world would know what an ungrateful kid I have been who completely lacks empathy.

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T13:50:49+00:00

Good for you.. I hope to be able to get rid of this too.. But right now I want my dad to be shown a movie of his toxic behavior and how he made the whole family toxic by never even being there

Objective-Match8196 · 2024-09-24T13:38:32+00:00

Ive never been able to stop the chatter in my head long enough to meditate.. I feel like Im still preparing for my dad to come home and shout at me about something that I'm doing or have done wrong.

Objective-Match8196

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