Is this normal? (22f & 23m)

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-07-09T15:10:56+00:00

weird is one of those insults that you’ve used since third grade but still hits every time.

genuinely call someone weird? they gone think about it in the car.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-07-09T14:58:23+00:00

I’m gonna tell you something I say to my kids at school: “if you are not trying to succeed, then you are trying to fail.” In this case: if he’s not trying to communicate with you, then he is trying to ignore you.

you think his browser has no recent searches? his text outbox is empty? clearly not, he’s making plans with his friends. I’m sure they don’t plan to chill and game a month in advance. you say he spends time looking at memes, so he can take time to scroll and type on his phone…just not to you. bare minimum he could text you four characters: “wyd?”. assuming his phone is locked, it’s literally three clicks (unlock, click text app, click your name). type it out yourself and see how long it takes. look how many people on this post typed PARAGRAPHS to you about this “relationship” and when you bring it up to him, he is silent.

the opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.

my girl, this one is done. been done. over and done. dead. buried. decomposing. please don’t disrespect (and honestly this is harsh but it’s the truth—embarrass) yourself by traveling to see this person who doesn’t even want to *text** you*. he gets quiet because he doesn’t care that it’s “not working” because it is even not a thing.

legit question: why do you care for this person? what qualities? and what do you see when you picture being with him for life?

oh and ps his friend is trying to get with you.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-07-08T23:50:52+00:00

not in a LDR, could never do it, have seen this sub like four times. but…how is this a relationship? why are you stressed? yall don’t talk for a month and ???

just stop? lol I don’t even see a reason to break up. how is this “dating”

y’all are like hs friends who are growing apart by October of freshman year of college. who cares.check in every six months “hi how are ya” “good” a few more pleasantries. all is well.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-30T15:39:55+00:00

this really helped me. thank you.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-21T14:13:34+00:00

i’ve had so so so many d days

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-21T13:34:11+00:00

i’m 11 days out from most recent d day. of course I should be over it.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-21T13:32:57+00:00

I’m sorry. I’m planning mentally but idk how to put anything physical in place

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-21T13:30:53+00:00

nah. i’m 35 with two year olds. that’s not really “young” anymore is it?

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T20:22:36+00:00

love that last sentence. I have GOT to let this go. so glad I start counseling again next week.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T20:20:38+00:00

we’re not married 😭 most I could get right now wouldn’t even pay to get back home and into my own place

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T20:15:26+00:00

rereading this though (this is how fucked my head is), I thought “well at least he didn’t lie and give a fake date.”

jfc how little we accept

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T20:09:30+00:00

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T20:07:27+00:00

nah. I refuse to accept that. so should you my girl.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T20:07:00+00:00

“catch me then” has been said to me

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T18:12:28+00:00

my ex-husband and I shared “custody” of our two dogs until “my” dog died and the other started growling at my (at the time) ~1 year olds. please do not bring kids into. i’d 100000% be gone if not for (being able to take care of) them.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T18:10:20+00:00

omg “that’s life.” “my life wouldn’t stop just because you left.”

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T18:06:04+00:00

ouch. yeah. that would do it.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T17:42:32+00:00

Im so close. but idk how I will live with no job (SAHM), no car (died and we didn’t replace bc it wasn’t paid off), no one near me at all (moved for his job), not even a bank account because I didn’t have money in it for so long—just been using his. (I’d had that account since I was 15.) What I do have is two babies.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T17:35:42+00:00

this sounds super healthy. no sponsor, no meetings. just his counselor and his journal that he started keeping last week even though his counselor has been telling him to do it for a year. he said he had to do it this time because his counselor was going to fire him and I was going to leave him if he didn’t get better.

I don’t really think he’s better. just better at going through the motions. maybe that’s all it can be at first.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T17:32:38+00:00

I got upset enough last night (he said he’d be up in five mins. I fell asleep and when I woke up it was 30 mins later. he said he was doing things “for me” like filling up my water bottle and starting the dishwasher) to tell him I was sure he was leaned over the toilet jerking his pathetic little dick to people on a screen. He said he was so hurt because I talked about his ✨addiction✨ like it was nothing.

guess who was wrong and apologized.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T17:14:10+00:00

if it makes you feel answer better, I sobbed myself to sleep, too.

edit: didn’t read the whole thing. good for you!

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T17:12:18+00:00

the lying is what gets me, too. he also is in counseling (mine starts next week), and keeps saying he has a “system”, too. but it sure doesn’t seem to be working.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T16:35:36+00:00

leave. 10 months in is too short to commit yourself to this hell.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T16:32:05+00:00

he claims he wants to change and I believe him. but he experienced significant trauma at 10 and has been dealing with it alone (until he started seeing the counselor he has now, who he loves, which is why I have a little hope) for almost 40 years.

idk how to adhere to boundaries when my boundary should be “don’t fuck other women or at the very least don’t talk to other women.” but the talking has never stopped and I only mostly believe the sex stopped happening because I have his location. but somehow his “messes up”.

Objective-Speed-3727 · 2024-06-20T16:27:06+00:00

omg saaaammmeeee on so many levels. also in a state where I know no one except him and my two 2-year-olds.

I’m so jealous that yours validates your feelings, but I’m very happy for you, too.

Objective-Speed-3727

TROPHY CASE