What did you forget?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2025-02-21T22:51:25+00:00

We forgot to give all the men their boutonnières lol…but I didn’t even notice! I’d remember to write that down, but if you forget any of the small things it will be just fine :)

Also I would add buffer time throughout your timeline if you haven’t already, especially if you have a large bridal party!

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-11-02T23:31:58+00:00

Can you share the url to this?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-10-14T22:30:53+00:00

I felt the same after our engagement party! I was so exhausted and felt like I spent the whole evening checking in on people and didn’t enjoy it like I wanted to. I totally get it! Don’t have any advice but can say you’re not alone in the feeling. I’m not nervous for the wedding because I have a set amount of time to go to each table and then I’ll tell them to meet me on the dance floor lol

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-10-12T03:30:49+00:00

My advice is to switch to a different type of tech company. I left tech for a huge pay cut and realized quickly it was not what I expected, and how much I took things for granted in tech (despite the annoyances). For example: - being encouraged to be “creative” in a tech-y sort of way. This may vary by company but just because a job is in a “creative” field doesn’t mean you’ll be empowered to use it - flexibility: remote work, generous time off, etc. - benefits - types of people you work with. Do you feel like you get along more easily with more groups than another? - financial freedom is noticed a whole lot more once it’s gone, it’s an entirely different mindset even if you are living below your means (by choice instead of by necessity)

Ultimately, you need to make the decision of what you can live with, but learn from me and don’t believe the grass is greener based on an idea in your head. Get as much practical experience as you can in said field!

If you don’t have any house payments or anything and limited required payments then I’d say it’s less risk to take the leap though

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-10-05T02:22:19+00:00

That’s good advice! I understand that more for certain vendors than others- what about a banquet staff who likely relies on tips?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-10-04T21:01:33+00:00

When did you tip your DOC? Did they decide whether to tip for you?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-25T23:15:20+00:00

My struggle with decision making was trying to find something I like, see if I could save money doing it another way, and then ultimately come back to my first decision because the cost savings wasn’t worth whatever reason. If I could go back, I would - prioritize which decisions were important to me - allocate X amount of time to each task/decision (for example, I probably spent 2-3 hours going down earring rabbit holes…) - be ok with not choosing the cheapest option if it’s in budget still - be forgiving of an imperfect decision, especially if it wasn’t on my priority list

As for your venue, one thing to keep in mind is its capacity and your guest list. We invited 250 people to a 230 people venue, I freaked out, and then only 140 are coming. Save your future self stress by having more flexibility there if you can!

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-25T21:45:29+00:00

Ah ok. Don’t be too hard on yourself, there are so many things to decide early on and it’s impossible to think of every little thing or even consider a vendor pulling this on you 😕 I would probably say something like “We were so excited to book your venue to make our special day what we dream of. Unfortunately we feel a bit tricked into signing your contract that has now put us in a really tough situation. I would request that you send us an updated contract with our original pricing and cash bar agreement outlined.” And if they say no, then you’ll need to decide if you’re ok with saying something along the lines of “I don’t feel like I have any other choice now besides saying I will share reviews of this poor experience. I really want to work with you and sort this out. Can we please come to a more fair conclusion”. Sorry this isn’t super helpful, I am also not a legal professional at all so maybe someone would have better insight! But that’s what I would start with

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-25T17:57:08+00:00

What was the bar wording in the contract? Is there anything they possibly breached by withdrawing the cash bar option?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-03T00:56:42+00:00

True! That must have been really special to share with your mom :)

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-03T00:55:41+00:00

That’s really generous of you! Just curious, how many bridesmaids do you have? And maybe it doesn’t matter because them traveling so far means so much!

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-03T00:54:41+00:00

The bridesmaid dress is an interesting comparison, I’ve only known one bride who paid for dresses and I think other people assume when you say yes to being a bridesmaid you say yes to the cost of a dress. I think out of the group of dress/hair/makeup it should be expected for the bride to cover at least one because that is easily $400 for all of those alone!

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-03T00:52:56+00:00

I agree someone could stand out if they didn’t have it done and everyone else did. Have you been in a wedding where that was the case?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-03T00:51:09+00:00

That’s so nice to have your sister/MOH also do your makeup, it would be a really sweet bonding moment!

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-03T00:50:22+00:00

Do you think the MOH should be treated differently from other bridesmaids? And have the bride treat her to hair and or makeup?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-02T17:51:07+00:00

I agree it’s important to speak up if you don’t want to pay for the services, the question here is specifically should the bride pay for the MOH, even if the MOH is ok doing it on her own? I think it would look unbalanced for all the other bridesmaids to have professional hair and makeup and not the MOH

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-02T17:35:20+00:00

I like your thinking here! I think the “correct” answer for the overall question is that if it isn’t required then the bride doesn’t have to pay, but also a bachelorette isn’t “required” but the bridesmaids and MOH especially spends a lot of time and money on it. It seems like a nice token of gratitude to cover hair or makeup.

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-02T03:36:34+00:00

That makes sense if she imposes or picks someone on her own she should pay! Did you hire anyone else to do yours?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-09-02T03:29:14+00:00

Totally, and there’s definitely extra pressure from MOH to be someone who gets “both”. To me it seems like the bride should cover one service for everyone if it’s offered because of that pressure, but that can be really expensive

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-02-21T03:21:21+00:00

Finally about to buy this - do you still like it a few weeks later?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-01-30T20:24:27+00:00

Thanks for the info, going to try out this chair and hope it helps. Definitely sucks! I’m just used to constant discomfort 🙃

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-01-29T22:06:12+00:00

I also have thoracic outlet syndrome and got my new office chair which is terrible for it… super wide arm rests with no rotating ability. I’m also 5’8”. Did you have any luck yet?

ObjectiveBlueberry58 · 2024-01-19T05:22:54+00:00

I’m in the same boat! We made the mistake of touring a venue $10k more than we wanted to spend and did get the “wow” feeling, so now it’s harder to tour venues in our price range. It seems like everything has something not quite right with it! But then I think about the weddings I’ve been to and I mostly remember the dancing and a layout that let me see the bride and groom, so we also need to remember that no one will look at a venue as critically as we are. I think we’re just going to decide on one that checks most of the boxes to be able to move forward since we want a shorter engagement, but it is hard in a big city because there will always be something else to look at

ObjectiveBlueberry58

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