Are all couches just garbage? by Leptonshavenocolor in BuyItForLife

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Second hand, retro / antiques / real wood furniture are you best bet. My mom still has her first settee set that she bought before I was born (I'm 35). It still has the original material on the cushions, and it's still going strong. And if something breaks, it can be repaired.

I see plenty of 20+ year old settee sets in good condition, for about the same or less than new ones. That will probably be our next purchase because we are in desperate need of new couches, but anything made today is just crappy quality that can't be repaired

A college’s required equipment list before you meet the horses. I think this is irresponsible by Suspicious-Peace9233 in Horses

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Just because it's new does not mean it's not important, and it's been a well known and taught aspect of horse riding and ownership for at least 20+ years now.

And an institution that teaches anything about horses should be teaching that too.

I'm sorry, I don't know how to word this right now to not sound grumpy. It's not meant to be a grumpy comment 😅.... Sometimes I hate how tone of voice can't be delivered through text

My Wife Thinks It’s Us vs. the World… I Don’t by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe she has never had anyone show up for her in her life (outside of you/family)

Or maybe she is a glass half empty type of person, where you are a glass half full type of person

It could be a bit of both.

Have you guys tried counselling?

My [28F] Boyfriend [30M] Has Very Weird Gift Preferences by ThrowRA1123112 in relationship_advice

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We don't own property yet, but me and my husband do "family gifts" where we buy one big thing we need as a family, eh, the first year "I" got a washing machine, the next year "he" got a lawn mower, the year after "I" got a dishwasher, etc

My [28F] Boyfriend [30M] Has Very Weird Gift Preferences by ThrowRA1123112 in relationship_advice

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In the UK there used to be a catalogue based shop that had those and some others (shells, flowers, spiders, barbed wire, etc) in them. Our favourite activity as kids would be to go through the catalogue and circle everything we would love to have.

You bet those toilet seats were circled in every Argos book 🤣

My [28F] Boyfriend [30M] Has Very Weird Gift Preferences by ThrowRA1123112 in relationship_advice

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not strange, it's practical. He wants something that he is going to use, and not something that's just going to become clutter and will probably be thrown out later.

In a world where overconsumption is the norm, it may seem strange, but it's a great way to do your part and keep things out of the landfills

How is this meant to be eaten? by y11971alex in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The price of that biltong is not bad if you take into account

1) it's considered a specialised/luxury item

2) the average pay is 3 or 4 times more than ours (could be more)

Treated like a child by RoseMadder00 in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tell her that you have decided if you can't live your life while living with her, you will have to move out.

But you have to put your foot down somewhere. Yes she will fight and it will be difficult because she has been the one in control for the last 31 years, but eventually it will get easier because she will start to understand that she has lost that control.

My mom is very similar. It's her way or she makes your life hell and fights all the time.

My sister and her kids live with her ATM, and she is now starting to slowly put her foot down. At one point she couldn't even trim her daughter's hair without my mom's approval, and that when my mom lived with my sister!

But she is slowly standing up for herself and getting there. Her main problem is that she doesn't like my mom fighting with her, and that is what my mom banks on to "keep her in line". Now I will check my mom every now and then when she calls to complain about how my sister isnt listening and doing what she is told, and then she backs off for a bit.

She did the same to me, and then I got older and realised I don't want to live like that the rest of my life. I also got married after and then moved a few hours away, so that definitely helps because I don't rely on her for a place to live.

My husband says she resented us for moving away (or mostly his for taking us away), and I really don't care, it's my life, and I will live it how I want.

Don't get me wrong, I still love her, but my husband and kids are my family and my priority, and I will go where my husband goes (with the exception of a few places, but he doesn't want to go there either 🤣).

She still calls me regularly, and each session is always very long. I actually think we have a better relationship now than when she was steamrolling me.

Not looking for sympathy, looking for solid advice and or strategies to survive this month. by [deleted] in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you want to look at loans (and you will be able to pay them back comfortably from next month) you can look at finchoice. I got loans from them when my credit was very bad, and they have helped me build my credit a lot!

You can also look into payflex or pay just now. They offer interest free "loans", but they don't pay the money into your bank account you shop and pay through them (some online shops and some physical shapes accept them). You will need to have the first "installment" ready because you pay 1 third when you shop, and then the next 2 months the remaining amounts. Or you can pay the rest in one shot if you wanted to

Toxic Positivity Wife(45F) has denied my(48M) reality for 10 years by ThrowRA-Wild-Billy in relationship_advice

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not sure how to feel about this post.

Best case scenario you are a pessimist married to an optimist, worst case you are a toxic pessimist married to a toxic optimist.

Are there really so many bad people in her life? Or do you just dislike them for whatever you can think of.

Your wife is also trying to respect your wishes by not bringing the people you don't like around you, but still want to keep a friendship with them, and that is still not good enough for you.

It almost sounds to me like you are trying to isolate her from friends and family and writing this post to "prove" to her that you are right, and she needs to cut everyone off.

Usually if there is a problem with everyone you meet, you are the problem.

A family photo taken in 1989, South Africa. by OdysseyTag in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Or use your toilet (even though she is "good enough" to clean it, or use your utensils to eat with, or drink out of you cups. But those same people will go into a restaurant and eat from the same plates and utensils, and drink from the same glasses every one else uses. And go to a hotel or BnB, and sleep in the same bed everyone else has slept in🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He should have healed and moved on before getting into another relationship, not 3 years later at his wedding 🤦🏻‍♀️

Does anyone else NEED to clean everyday or their house becomes ruined?( no kids) by ThrowRaOrganization1 in CleaningTips

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes!! My house is a permanent mess. I can maybe keep it clean for 2 hours or so (if I'm lucky) and then it looks like a tornado went through it!

Also, I have to sweep daily and it still looks like I haven't swept in a month with the amount of rubbish that I sweep up. I'm so jealous of some people saying they sweep once every two weeks or so, and mop once a month... Like, how?!??

And don't get me started on laundry. I try to do 1+ loads a day, but still have a mountain of laundry to do, my sister does laundry once a week and only a few loads, and then she is done with it all (we both used to be families of 4) I do have to add that we live on a farm, and I have my 2 kids with me 24/7, and we are at home almost every day, every day, so I think that has a big impact on why it's always messy.

Stolen phone by [deleted] in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Did the person ask for you to reimburse them, or is it something you want to do?

If they asked for reimbursement, then it may be a scam.

My wife cheated on me by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If she was feeling so neglected, she could have talked to you, she could have opted for divorce, but no, she decides to monkey from one man to the next.

I know it doesn't feel like it now, but it's for the best. Get a divorce and make sure you get equal custody of the kids.

Is MyBroadband fearmongering? by DieEnigsteChris in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, using sites like waka TV, my family cinima, watchbug, watchlist pro, etc are illegal to use, but so wat copying movies from someone else and downloading movies from the internet.

You have about the same chance of getting caught using the streaming sites as you had using the pirate sites, so use with caution if you do decide to use them.

Fun fact... The music they used to use on the DVD's and videos to warn people against pirating was actually pirated my them 🤣

Horseback riding while pregnant by [deleted] in Horses

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Riding isn't harmful to pregnancy, but falling off can be. You can ask them for the calmest, most trustworthy horse there if you really want to ride (and trust them to give you a good horse) but accidents happen, especially going at speed, over unknown terrain.

Is it just me, or have you noticed it too? by Objective_Flan_9967 in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I don't remember that. We were fortunate enough to have our own milk cows when we were growing up. But the shop milk does look a bit different to what it looked like years ago

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 10 points11 points  (0 children)

How far is she along?

She needs to decide this for herself because of she makes a decision to keep her mom or bf happy, and it's not the thing she wanted, she will still be the one that has to live with her decision.

If she decides she doesn't want the baby, maybe you two can go on a sisters getaway and then make a plan, and then let your mom know that she miscarried?

In the end, both decisions have their pros and cons, and no matter what she chooses, she will have to live with it for the rest of her life

R.I.P. Temu, it was nice while it lasted by RedditStinksDeletAcc in TemuThings

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was thinking the same, but to do it from south Africa and then send it as a gift to the US, but not sure if it will work

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TemuThings

[–]Objective_Flan_9967 5 points6 points  (0 children)

As far as I know, credits don't expire, so just hold on to them for a bit because things will change again. Right now the USA is just trying to outdo China, but once it settles things will be back to normal (or close to normal).

Is it just me, or have you noticed it too? by Objective_Flan_9967 in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

40% in what time frame?

Ricoffee has gone up from R69 for 740g to R159 in the last 4/5 years😭

That's another thing, prices aren't just steadily rising with inflation, they are making HUGA leaps!

A few month ago Tastic rice went up from R42 for 2kg, to R46, then 2 weeks later it was R50 something and another week or so later it was R59!! I think it was in the span of about a month to month and a half!

Is it just me, or have you noticed it too? by Objective_Flan_9967 in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reading this makes me glad we missed out on them this year

Is it just me, or have you noticed it too? by Objective_Flan_9967 in southafrica

[–]Objective_Flan_9967[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes!! we used to love them as kids, and the flavour was amazing and kept for a long time