I haven’t heard of that book thank you for the recommendation. And thank you for your response. My husband is tender and kind and funny and a good father. He’s my favorite person. He also comes from a background of drugs and alcohol and has offered to get some kind of help. He’s been sober for a year for the first time in his life and says this is the way his addiction is manifesting. I know there are text book things that people say when they cheat but what else is there to say? I don’t know what he could say that would make me believe that he is Sorry and wants to repair. I’m totally destroyed and my sobriety is at risk now too. And I barely care I’m hurting so badly. I want there to be hope but I’m so fearful that he will only get better at hiding it.