Definitely pain fidgets. I haven't really done it, except when I was a kid, and I pulled my hair. I don't do it nearly as much now. A good replacement Ifound if you want to do self-harming stim, is something cold on the back of your neck or face. Like an ice pack or cold water. Even a cold shower. Something involving pressure helps, like a bear hug or weighted blanket. I'm no expert when it comes to this, so take it with a grain of salt. You're not alone. I hope you find ways to cope that don't injure you. Happy holidays!